Zero felt oddly like there wasn't quite enough oxygen in the room as Kaname just looked at him for a long moment before the pureblood's mouth dipped insistently back to his cheek and neck, making all kinds of heat shiver through the ex-human's body. Zero resisted a small groan, his hand almost automatically sliding up to tangle in Kaname's hair, feeling boneless as he sat trapped in the chair.
Then he seemed to come back to himself a little and his flush deepened. He quickly released Kaname's hair.
"Kuran, cut it out," Zero growled, shoving uselessly against him again before giving up and instead swiftly sliding down in the chair and ducking out from underneath the other vampire. Kaname's hands caught in the front of Zero's shirt as he gained his feet. It was as if the pureblood was unwilling to release him.
"I'm gonna go check if the coast's clear yet..." Zero was mostly looking for an escape route to put some distance between them as he tried to politely pry Kaname's fingers lose. He quickly gave up on politely because the pureblood wasn't budging. "Kaname...!" exasperation was creeping swiftly into his voice. "Come on, let me go!"
"No!" There was a strange, desperate look in the pureblood's eyes that Zero didn't understand. Kaname was trying to control himself, but that control was slipping, wearing away under the continual onslaught he was drowning under. He hadn't expected it to be this bad.
"No..." it was more of a whisper now. "You must to stay close to me... I need you to... oh God..." Kaname groaned softly through his teeth as if in absolute agony, which he was. His fists wound tighter into Zero's shirt, holding the other almost painfully close.
Zero was well and truly freaked out now. Was Kaname having some kind of nervous breakdown? What the hell was going on? They certainly couldn't afford to have him cracking up at a time like this!
"Kaname will you get a hold of yourself? What the hell is your problem?" he snapped, shaking the pureblood roughly by the shoulders, but unable to dislodge the death grip Kaname had on his shirt, which was starting to tear in the desperate vampire's fingers.
"Don't you understand?" Kaname rasped through his teeth, his throat constricting and aching sharply as if he'd swallowed a gallon of glass shards. Of course, there was no way Zero could understand, so Kaname knew he had to tell him, while the pureblood was still coherent enough to make the ex-human understand the danger.
"I had a blood bond with Ichijo," Kaname murmured miserably. He hated to admit it to anyone, but Zero needed to know. "I bit him in a struggle, and while I was his captive, he bit me, repeatedly." Kaname's voice was trembling with what Zero thought was rage, but it had a very raw, almost despairing edge to it that the ex-human did not yet understand. However, Zero did remember the multiple, grievous bite wounds on Kaname's neck when he'd found him in the dungeon in Ichijo's house, remembered what he had witnessed only a short while before back in the ruined office complex and he couldn't help the spike of deep hatred for the dead vampire that welled through him. Zero understood little really, about these vampire blood bonds, but he'd felt the effects that the one he and Kaname shared had on him, even unwilling. Kaname seemed a hundred times more sensitive to it than he was and he didn't want to imagine what that must have enabled Ichijo to do to Kaname when he was their prisoner. However, that still didn't explain what was happening now, after Ichijo was dead... shouldn't Kaname be glad? Why was he cracking up?
Unexpectedly, Kaname buried his face against Zero's chest, desperately seeking the warmth of the connectedness he felt when he was near the other vampire, because of the bond that they shared. He needed that... needed it desperately or he may very well be lost.
Zero's eyes were more than a little wide as Kaname burrowed like a wounded kitten against his chest, practically nuzzling him. Okay, this was just getting way, waaaay too weird. He grabbed Kaname by a fistful of the long, dark hair on the back of his head, but he almost didn't have the heart to try and yank him away... the pureblood seemed so desperate, and Zero just couldn't understand why.
"It doesn't matter how they were formed... blood bonds are dangerous things, the purer your blood, the more dangerous it is..." Kaname was trying hard to hurriedly finish the explanation even as he felt the humiliating and unstoppable sting of tears pressing at the back of his eyes. This was really unbearable; he'd had no idea it was going to be like this... how could his body do this to him? He was so damn angry... and yet all he wanted to do was cry. Ichijo was really having the last laugh on this one, wasn't he? Everything he'd done to Kaname... and now even his well deserved death threatened to destroy the pureblood's sanity.
"Because when a bond is broken by a death, it has a very strong effect on the other party involved. It has nothing to do with feelings or logic, it's just... the way it is..." Kaname's voice was tightly controlled, but Zero could hear the hitch of his breathing. "I hated him, he deserved to die, but apparently... that doesn't matter. When a pureblood suffers a broken bond, sometimes it can drive them crazy or... or worse..."
Kaname couldn't hold back the small, aborted tremors that he would not refer to as sobs that were starting to shake through him. His body heaved as he held tight to Zero, using the other vampire as a grounding wire to keep him hanging on, keep him half-way sane... keep him from wanting to bash his head into the wall or throw himself out the window just to make the intense emptiness in his chest and the screaming pain in his head stop.
Zero was completely bewildered by this whole situation, but whatever was going on... it had to be bad, because he could imagine nothing on earth that would make the proud pureblood break down in front of him like this... or drive Kaname to be clinging to him so desperately, as if Zero was his only lifeline. Unless... the thought hit Zero like a thunderclap. Maybe he was Kuran's lifeline.
Zero released Kaname's hair and his hands slid hesitantly, awkwardly down to rest on the pureblood's heaving shoulders. "We... we have one of those too, don't we? That... bond thing," he murmured quietly... not sure if he was horrified or intrigued. He was feeling it again, Kaname's sorrow echoing faintly in his own chest, that weird throbbing sensation in his neck.
"Yes..." Kaname's strangled whisper was just audible as he nuzzled his face harder against Zero's chest, inhaling his scent deeply, raggedly. He needed to feel Zero, needed to be close to him, taste him... needed to focus on anything other than that which was tearing him apart. Kaname started kissing Zero's chest through his shirt, his hot mouth pressing at the fabric over the other's nipple as he rubbed his face back and forth in an almost catlike manner against the shirt, whimpering softly. If he'd had enough sense about him to really realize what he was doing, Kaname would probably have died from shame, but he didn't have the mental capacity to feel embarrassed about what he was doing right now. He knew only what his body needed to stay sane, to survive... and his will to survive was strong.
Zero felt a weird, awkward but electric shiver pass through him as he felt what Kaname was doing. He jerked and tried to pull away, hands clamping on Kaname's shoulders.
"Wha-? Whoa... hey...!" he protested, but Kaname wouldn't let go and it was impossible to pry the clingy pureblood off. Kaname was like a barnacle that was completely oblivious to Zero's attempts to dislodge him.
Zero felt that strange, unwanted, but delicious heat roiling through him again as Kaname's teeth penetrated lightly through his shirt, playing against his skin while the heat of the pureblood's mouth felt like a small inferno of pleasure as it pressed against him. Zero's gaze shot around the dark, deserted storehouse they were holed up in. Geez... Kaname really knew how to pick his moments and locations, didn't he? First the woods, now here...
Zero felt his back slam up against the wall of crates behind him and realized that Kaname had pushed him back, long fingers hurriedly, desperately pushing Zero's shirt up and tearing it open so that Kaname could nuzzle and taste his bare skin. It helped, a little... when he was doing that, he could hold the darkness devouring him at bay, he could hold onto the warmth of the bond still flowing between them, could use it to fill the devastating emptiness in his chest and try to shut out the clawing fingers of night...
"T-this is why you brought me along..." Zero gulped softly, understanding blossoming slowly as he shivered under the incredibly un-ignorable sensation of Kaname's caresses. Suddenly it all made sense... this was the real reason Kaname had wanted him to be the one to come with him, or at least a large part of it. Kaname had known he might face Ichijo, had known that if he did, he would kill the Aristocrat. And Kaname had known... what it meant to break a blood bond in that manner. Zero was his insurance policy. The bond that neither of them had wanted to share was ironically now essential to the pureblood.
"I need you... I need... our bond... or I've nothing to hold onto..." Kaname whispered raggedly, but truthfully, against Zero's chest. It would have been a hard thing, admitting that he needed the other vampire so desperately, if Kaname wasn't already half out of his mind.
Maybe Zero should have felt a bit used... but it wasn't as if he wanted to hear that Kaname wanted him for any other reason after all. At least... not yet, not consciously. The blissful havoc Kaname was wreaking on his senses wasn't hurting either. Besides... there was something so incredibly compelling about seeing Kaname like this, so shaken and needy... it drew Zero to him like a powerful electro magnet. How could Zero not help him? Especially when he was the only one who could?
Kaname was trying desperately to get hold of himself. He didn't have time for this! Didn't have time, and it was so unbelievably stupid... but his body didn't seem to understand that. His knees felt weak and the aching pain in his chest was physically agonizing. The chemicals in his brain and body were firing relentlessly on their own programming, flooding his system with artificial despair that could not be explained by any logical means. Kaname himself really didn't understand why this was happening, although he'd been afraid it would. The reason pureblood suicide had claimed as many lives as it had over the centuries was almost exclusively as a result of a severed blood bond. Kaname had always assumed it was because those who formed such bonds were so deeply in love they couldn't live without one another, but now he supposed he had been somewhat naive. If this was what it felt like, even when there had been no love involved, and in fact had been only hatred... he didn't want to imagine what it would be like when the real grief for a loved one was also involved. Perhaps those poor souls left in this state had really simply had no other choice but to end their lives. How could one possibly live for an eternity like this?
Right now, he certainly felt like he wanted to die, as horrendously idiotic as that was. But it wasn't something he had any control over. He felt like he was going insane. Only the wonderful, live saving feeling of Zero's presence, throbbing in his senses, of the other vampire's skin under his fingers, under his mouth as he trailed his lips across the boy's chest and stomach, was keeping him on this side of reason.
Zero's body was mottled in places from their earlier altercations and Kaname kissed the bruises tenderly. So strange... bruises that did not fade immediately. So frightening to think of such fragileness... Kaname buried his face against Zero's chest again, holding him close as another wave of barely controlled tremors tore through him. Deep, terrible mortification was also burning through the pureblood at his helplessness to control this bizarre, chemical despair and that wasn't helping his unbalanced emotional state one bit. A moment of sanity wavered by and he realized what he was doing to Zero. Was he really this desperate? Why couldn't he just get himself under control? He shook harder; he was nearly choking as he struggled to fight both this unnatural depression and the unbearable tug to use Zero to ward it off. But he couldn't do both... one or the other was going to have to win.
Zero caught Kaname's head between his hands, feeling the pureblood's anguished breaths echoing through him and against him. He understood now. He needed to distract Kaname, keep him focused on something other than whatever physical and mental effects the broken bond was having on him until... until what? Until it passed, hopefully. Zero had no idea, how was he supposed to know these things? Damn vampires and their oddities...
"Shhh... it's okay, Kaname..." he murmured soothingly, drawn irresistibly to comfort the other. "It will be all right. This has to pass, right? It's not real, so it has to pass, and it will... shh..." Zero dipped his head and mouthed Kaname's neck a bit hesitantly, licking at the bite area which he had a feeling Kaname would like.
Kaname did. Intensely apparently, because a shiver coursed through him as he leaned against Zero and he leaned eagerly into the touch, murmuring softly in a way that encouraged continuation. Slowly, Zero complied, licking and nibbling lightly at the graceful curve of the pureblood's neck, tracking his lips and tongue up and down the flawless ivory flesh in a slow trail of what he was trying not to refer to as kisses. It was just a tactic to keep Kaname distracted, that was all. He knew the pureblood's neck was a sensitive place. His own was. Zero wasn't really sure what to do and was pretty much winging things. Maybe if Kaname drank his blood it would make him feel better...?
As if reading his mind, Kaname's mouth had slid to Zero's neck, but he wasn't biting him. He was licking and caressing Zero in return. And yes... he was definitely kissing him.
Weird. Everything about this was weird. Zero wished he felt more uncomfortable. He didn't though, and that bothered him because instead it simply felt so... good.
Zero's breath escaped in a trembling rush against Kaname's neck as his mouth moved almost of its own accord in more fevered, urgent patterns against the pureblood's skin. He ached to taste... to touch... his fingers curled into the Kaname's shirt as he gripped the pureblood's upper arms tighter.
Kaname's hands slid across Zero's chest, pushing the now button-less shirt open further as he caressed sensually, hungrily. Kaname's body was still shaking and his breath hitched and hiccupped softly against Zero's skin every now and again as he kissed him, but it seemed that when he was thus occupied, the despair was easier to keep at bay.
Zero was consumed by the deep, unimaginable desire to be bitten. Kaname's mouth was kissing and teasing, but not biting him, and although he had never in a million years imagined he would feel this way, Zero ached to feel the other's teeth sinking into his flesh, to feel his blood being drawn. He also ached to do the same in return.
Lightly, he teased Kaname's neck with his fangs, as if to give him the idea... but his own teasing backfired and before he realized it, Zero felt his fangs breaking the skin and claiming the pureblood's neck and his blood. The beautiful taste took his senses and he felt like he was reeling, giddy from the intensity of the sensation.
Kaname's bite area on both sides of his throat had been throbbing wildly with empty, aching pain since Ichijo's death. When Zero kissed and licked him, it felt a bit better. When he unexpectedly sank his teeth in... it felt a lot better. Kaname's knees practically buckled from the mind-rending combination of sensual bliss and emotional agony that was warring inside him.
He gasped softly against Zero's neck, his body shaking from he knew not what anymore, all his feelings and sensations were becoming too mixed up to qualify or quantify. Didn't matter. All he cared about at the moment was how very, very much he wanted to bite the warm, delightful neck under his mouth. And there was no reason on earth why he shouldn't. It was almost strange to have something he wanted so intensely actually be achievable... to not feel he had to hold back or deny himself.
Zero groaned in pleasure as he finally felt Kaname's teeth in his neck, that unique sensation of having his blood drawn filling his senses as they fed on each other simultaneously. Zero had never fed and been fed upon at the same time before, neither had Kaname. It was a wholly unique and indescribable feeling. Truly, there was no way to quantify the shockingly deep, inexplicable kind of pleasure it gave, the blood-deep feeling of connectedness, of intimacy... of being one flesh with two hearts beating co-mingled blood through both bodies.
Zero couldn't breathe. Whatever he'd intended when he started this, however much he'd desired only to help Kaname... he was losing sight of all of that, very fast. His heart was racing and he wanted, needed more. He wanted to touch Kaname, and be touched in return... he wanted... dear heaven, he wanted to devour the pureblood completely in ways he couldn't even consciously comprehend because they were too foreign.
Even Kaname had not been prepared by how earth shatteringly incredible the mutual sharing of blood could be. Zero filled his senses completely, almost managing to block out the dark despair that was still trying to beat at him if he thought about it, if he didn't simply keep his every sense, his every thought and feeling tuned only to Zero. To the beat of his heart against Kaname's chest, the throb of his pulse as it spilled blood into Kaname's mouth, the soft, beautiful gasps of delight as their lips moved mutually against one another's skin, lost in a sea of vampire pleasure that no one else would ever have been able to understand.
Kaname drank greedily, deeply. He could, without fear of harming Zero, because Zero was latched onto his neck with equal hunger. There sensation of giving and taking was indescribable, it consumed him. At this moment, the pureblood wanted Zero more intensely than he felt he'd ever desired anything.
Zero devoured the pale, graceful neck, and he ached for more. He knew now, what it felt like, but he couldn't help himself – he slid his teeth free and bit down again, needing the delightful sensation of penetrating Kaname's flesh, repeatedly.
Kaname moaned and gasped softly against Zero's neck in pleasure. He knew by now, how Zero liked to do that, and interestingly enough, his body had learned to enjoy it. Of course it hurt, but it was a beautiful, delicious pain and right now every sensation was turning into pure bliss.
Gorged and intoxicated with sensual delight, Kaname finally lifted his head from Zero's neck a few minutes later. Zero was still busily enraptured with his neck and Kaname combed his fingers slowly through Zero's hair. "Zero..." he murmured huskily. The brown eyes were glazed and widely dilated. It was like a drug, these feelings... only so, so much better.
Reluctantly, Zero's head came up and their eyes met.
Kaname's gaze was drawn to the blood on Zero's mouth. Slowly, he leaned in, tongue lightly tracing the curve of Zero's lower lip as he lapped some of it up.
Zero felt his breath catch, almost failing him as his gaze held the pureblood's. He could get lost in the fire burning there... maybe he already was. Kaname's blood was throbbing through his veins, through his senses. It was a complete head-rush and he felt high as a kite – a kite sailing without a string in a gale. His body burned with a kind of yearning he almost didn't know how to handle. At this moment, he felt incredibly connected to the vampire in whose eyes he was getting lost.
Get a grip stupid... your only purpose here is to distract him... that's what he brought you for, that's what you agreed to. He's using you, that's all, this doesn't mean anything... a small voice inside Zero's skull was trying to make itself heard, but it was hard over the pounding in his ears.
"I-I think y-you're feeling better now..." the ex-human somehow managed to mumble out, hands sliding to Kaname's shoulders in a very half-hearted attempt to push him back. "We should, um..." But Zero couldn't seem to think what exactly it was they should do, because all his blood felt like it had pooled below the belt-line and was throbbing there so palpably it made trivial things like higher brain function seem impossible.
A bulldozer could not have dislodged Kaname at this moment, Zero's vague attempts certainly weren't about to do much. The pureblood easily captured Zero's hands in his, fingers intertwining, palms pressed together as he trapped Zero's hands back against the crate, on either side of the ex-human's head.
"We should what?" he murmured huskily, the low voice almost a purr. His face was still close to Zero's, his hot breath brushing the other's skin as he drank up the warmth of the hesitant but fiery passion flickering in the silver-red eyes. Kaname deliberately rocked his hips against Zero's, and the fact that both of them were very aroused was obvious.
Zero's eyes glazed and he arched back into the contact instinctively. He forgot whatever he'd been going to say. "We, um... we should... go..." he fought an uphill battle against himself for the words, his breath coming rapidly.
"It will be a while yet before the coast is clear... we have plenty of time," Kaname murmured back. There was the familiar look of a predator in his eyes again, but it excited Zero rather than scaring him this time.
Zero gulped softly, Kaname was still rocking against him and his mind was unraveling. "Plenty of time for what?" he demanded in a breathless whisper.
Kaname just looked at Zero, eyes intense, a small smile playing across his lips. He leaned in and slowly ran his tongue from Zero's collarbone to his ear, causing the other to shiver helplessly.
"I still need you, Zero..." he whispered against the velvety skin of the ex-human's earlobe, the pureblood's tongue and teeth playing lightly with the other's earrings. "All of you..."
As Kaname shifted his head back to look Zero in the face again, his heart and stomach were fluttering crazily, mingling with the intoxicating conflagration in his blood. They were playing with fire, this bond of theirs, and both were likely to get burned. Some part of Kaname knew... no matter what his well laid plans, no matter what his head tried to tell him, this wasn't only about using Zero for survival. Not anymore. Some part of him wanted Zero to know it too. He released Zero's right arm, his hand instead sliding to cup the other's cheek.
A fraction of an inch closer was all it took, and their lips met fully. Kaname kissed Zero very lightly, and at first Zero simply froze, an unreadable look firing through his eyes. For a moment, Kaname thought Zero would jerk away or possibly even try to hit him, but instead, the warm lips under his responded – hesitantly, very slowly, but they definitely responded.
For a moment, Zero very nearly did punch the other vampire for the sudden, incredibly intimate liberty he'd taken. It was weird, considering what they'd been doing, that it was this simplest of touches that wrung the most emotional reaction from him. But even so, Zero didn't try to move away. The touch of Kaname's lips on his felt like it had momentarily shorted his brain circuits. It was such a delicious sensation... he couldn't break away, despite a certain feeling of unnatural awkwardness. This was wrong on so many levels... he had certainly never imagined his first kiss like this. But... inexplicably... he found himself kissing Kaname back anyway. It was like his brain and body had completely severed ties, the latter happily doing as it pleased without the consent or approval of the former. He might have been tempted to blame it on Kaname, that the pureblood was influencing and controlling him – it certainly felt like an alien force had taken over his body. But somehow... that would never ring true. Deep down, Zero knew that at least at this moment, he wanted this too. His body was just being more honest than he was able to be consciously.
Kaname needed little encouragement and he leaned more hungrily into the kiss, his lips moving passionately against Zero's, his long fingers tangling in Zero's mussy silver locks. He physically ached for Zero, and he felt he could never manage to touch him enough to satisfy that ache. He kissed Zero deeply and passionately, lips parting, tongue exploring the exotic heat of his lover's mouth and playing against his fangs. Kaname was almost dizzy with the sensation and desire. He was overcome with the powerful urge to devour, but in an entirely different way than normal. He groaned softly as his body pressed up fully against Zero's, one hand remaining tangled in Zero's hair as the other slid down to sensually, urgently map the smooth contours of his chest.
It was a good thing Kaname had Zero pressed so firmly back against the crates behind him, because the ex-human's legs felt like limp noodles and he may not have been able to stand up on his own. The heat of Kaname's mouth, of his eyes, of his touch burned its way into Zero's skin and his consciousness in ways impossible to describe. Kaname seemed to have a lot less compunction about acting on his desires than Zero was experiencing, but slowly his own needs became too much to ignore. Slowly, Zero stopped just letting Kuran have his way and started responding in kind.
As Kaname's hand slid down to work the catch of his trousers, Zero started kissing him back in earnest, hesitation giving way to raw hunger. He would regret this later, he knew he would, but right now, none of that seemed to matter. His hands tangled in the soft hair at the back of Kaname's neck as he tugged him closer, tipping his head to explore more of his partner's mouth, to drink up the small, gasping groans of delight that were shuddering through the pureblood.
Zero bit Kaname's lower lip, somewhat accidentally, actually, in his urgent desire for contact. But Kaname reacted so beautifully that Zero did it again, intentionally. The pureblood's whole body shuddered against him and his eyes dilated sharply.
Kaname leaned more heavily into Zero, knees feeling like putty as he growled softly in his throat, tearing open the stubborn button on his partner's trousers, hand delving inside.
It was Zero's turn to gasp sharply and shudder.
Then he seemed to come back to himself a little and his flush deepened. He quickly released Kaname's hair.
"Kuran, cut it out," Zero growled, shoving uselessly against him again before giving up and instead swiftly sliding down in the chair and ducking out from underneath the other vampire. Kaname's hands caught in the front of Zero's shirt as he gained his feet. It was as if the pureblood was unwilling to release him.
"I'm gonna go check if the coast's clear yet..." Zero was mostly looking for an escape route to put some distance between them as he tried to politely pry Kaname's fingers lose. He quickly gave up on politely because the pureblood wasn't budging. "Kaname...!" exasperation was creeping swiftly into his voice. "Come on, let me go!"
"No!" There was a strange, desperate look in the pureblood's eyes that Zero didn't understand. Kaname was trying to control himself, but that control was slipping, wearing away under the continual onslaught he was drowning under. He hadn't expected it to be this bad.
"No..." it was more of a whisper now. "You must to stay close to me... I need you to... oh God..." Kaname groaned softly through his teeth as if in absolute agony, which he was. His fists wound tighter into Zero's shirt, holding the other almost painfully close.
Zero was well and truly freaked out now. Was Kaname having some kind of nervous breakdown? What the hell was going on? They certainly couldn't afford to have him cracking up at a time like this!
"Kaname will you get a hold of yourself? What the hell is your problem?" he snapped, shaking the pureblood roughly by the shoulders, but unable to dislodge the death grip Kaname had on his shirt, which was starting to tear in the desperate vampire's fingers.
"Don't you understand?" Kaname rasped through his teeth, his throat constricting and aching sharply as if he'd swallowed a gallon of glass shards. Of course, there was no way Zero could understand, so Kaname knew he had to tell him, while the pureblood was still coherent enough to make the ex-human understand the danger.
"I had a blood bond with Ichijo," Kaname murmured miserably. He hated to admit it to anyone, but Zero needed to know. "I bit him in a struggle, and while I was his captive, he bit me, repeatedly." Kaname's voice was trembling with what Zero thought was rage, but it had a very raw, almost despairing edge to it that the ex-human did not yet understand. However, Zero did remember the multiple, grievous bite wounds on Kaname's neck when he'd found him in the dungeon in Ichijo's house, remembered what he had witnessed only a short while before back in the ruined office complex and he couldn't help the spike of deep hatred for the dead vampire that welled through him. Zero understood little really, about these vampire blood bonds, but he'd felt the effects that the one he and Kaname shared had on him, even unwilling. Kaname seemed a hundred times more sensitive to it than he was and he didn't want to imagine what that must have enabled Ichijo to do to Kaname when he was their prisoner. However, that still didn't explain what was happening now, after Ichijo was dead... shouldn't Kaname be glad? Why was he cracking up?
Unexpectedly, Kaname buried his face against Zero's chest, desperately seeking the warmth of the connectedness he felt when he was near the other vampire, because of the bond that they shared. He needed that... needed it desperately or he may very well be lost.
Zero's eyes were more than a little wide as Kaname burrowed like a wounded kitten against his chest, practically nuzzling him. Okay, this was just getting way, waaaay too weird. He grabbed Kaname by a fistful of the long, dark hair on the back of his head, but he almost didn't have the heart to try and yank him away... the pureblood seemed so desperate, and Zero just couldn't understand why.
"It doesn't matter how they were formed... blood bonds are dangerous things, the purer your blood, the more dangerous it is..." Kaname was trying hard to hurriedly finish the explanation even as he felt the humiliating and unstoppable sting of tears pressing at the back of his eyes. This was really unbearable; he'd had no idea it was going to be like this... how could his body do this to him? He was so damn angry... and yet all he wanted to do was cry. Ichijo was really having the last laugh on this one, wasn't he? Everything he'd done to Kaname... and now even his well deserved death threatened to destroy the pureblood's sanity.
"Because when a bond is broken by a death, it has a very strong effect on the other party involved. It has nothing to do with feelings or logic, it's just... the way it is..." Kaname's voice was tightly controlled, but Zero could hear the hitch of his breathing. "I hated him, he deserved to die, but apparently... that doesn't matter. When a pureblood suffers a broken bond, sometimes it can drive them crazy or... or worse..."
Kaname couldn't hold back the small, aborted tremors that he would not refer to as sobs that were starting to shake through him. His body heaved as he held tight to Zero, using the other vampire as a grounding wire to keep him hanging on, keep him half-way sane... keep him from wanting to bash his head into the wall or throw himself out the window just to make the intense emptiness in his chest and the screaming pain in his head stop.
Zero was completely bewildered by this whole situation, but whatever was going on... it had to be bad, because he could imagine nothing on earth that would make the proud pureblood break down in front of him like this... or drive Kaname to be clinging to him so desperately, as if Zero was his only lifeline. Unless... the thought hit Zero like a thunderclap. Maybe he was Kuran's lifeline.
Zero released Kaname's hair and his hands slid hesitantly, awkwardly down to rest on the pureblood's heaving shoulders. "We... we have one of those too, don't we? That... bond thing," he murmured quietly... not sure if he was horrified or intrigued. He was feeling it again, Kaname's sorrow echoing faintly in his own chest, that weird throbbing sensation in his neck.
"Yes..." Kaname's strangled whisper was just audible as he nuzzled his face harder against Zero's chest, inhaling his scent deeply, raggedly. He needed to feel Zero, needed to be close to him, taste him... needed to focus on anything other than that which was tearing him apart. Kaname started kissing Zero's chest through his shirt, his hot mouth pressing at the fabric over the other's nipple as he rubbed his face back and forth in an almost catlike manner against the shirt, whimpering softly. If he'd had enough sense about him to really realize what he was doing, Kaname would probably have died from shame, but he didn't have the mental capacity to feel embarrassed about what he was doing right now. He knew only what his body needed to stay sane, to survive... and his will to survive was strong.
Zero felt a weird, awkward but electric shiver pass through him as he felt what Kaname was doing. He jerked and tried to pull away, hands clamping on Kaname's shoulders.
"Wha-? Whoa... hey...!" he protested, but Kaname wouldn't let go and it was impossible to pry the clingy pureblood off. Kaname was like a barnacle that was completely oblivious to Zero's attempts to dislodge him.
Zero felt that strange, unwanted, but delicious heat roiling through him again as Kaname's teeth penetrated lightly through his shirt, playing against his skin while the heat of the pureblood's mouth felt like a small inferno of pleasure as it pressed against him. Zero's gaze shot around the dark, deserted storehouse they were holed up in. Geez... Kaname really knew how to pick his moments and locations, didn't he? First the woods, now here...
Zero felt his back slam up against the wall of crates behind him and realized that Kaname had pushed him back, long fingers hurriedly, desperately pushing Zero's shirt up and tearing it open so that Kaname could nuzzle and taste his bare skin. It helped, a little... when he was doing that, he could hold the darkness devouring him at bay, he could hold onto the warmth of the bond still flowing between them, could use it to fill the devastating emptiness in his chest and try to shut out the clawing fingers of night...
"T-this is why you brought me along..." Zero gulped softly, understanding blossoming slowly as he shivered under the incredibly un-ignorable sensation of Kaname's caresses. Suddenly it all made sense... this was the real reason Kaname had wanted him to be the one to come with him, or at least a large part of it. Kaname had known he might face Ichijo, had known that if he did, he would kill the Aristocrat. And Kaname had known... what it meant to break a blood bond in that manner. Zero was his insurance policy. The bond that neither of them had wanted to share was ironically now essential to the pureblood.
"I need you... I need... our bond... or I've nothing to hold onto..." Kaname whispered raggedly, but truthfully, against Zero's chest. It would have been a hard thing, admitting that he needed the other vampire so desperately, if Kaname wasn't already half out of his mind.
Maybe Zero should have felt a bit used... but it wasn't as if he wanted to hear that Kaname wanted him for any other reason after all. At least... not yet, not consciously. The blissful havoc Kaname was wreaking on his senses wasn't hurting either. Besides... there was something so incredibly compelling about seeing Kaname like this, so shaken and needy... it drew Zero to him like a powerful electro magnet. How could Zero not help him? Especially when he was the only one who could?
Kaname was trying desperately to get hold of himself. He didn't have time for this! Didn't have time, and it was so unbelievably stupid... but his body didn't seem to understand that. His knees felt weak and the aching pain in his chest was physically agonizing. The chemicals in his brain and body were firing relentlessly on their own programming, flooding his system with artificial despair that could not be explained by any logical means. Kaname himself really didn't understand why this was happening, although he'd been afraid it would. The reason pureblood suicide had claimed as many lives as it had over the centuries was almost exclusively as a result of a severed blood bond. Kaname had always assumed it was because those who formed such bonds were so deeply in love they couldn't live without one another, but now he supposed he had been somewhat naive. If this was what it felt like, even when there had been no love involved, and in fact had been only hatred... he didn't want to imagine what it would be like when the real grief for a loved one was also involved. Perhaps those poor souls left in this state had really simply had no other choice but to end their lives. How could one possibly live for an eternity like this?
Right now, he certainly felt like he wanted to die, as horrendously idiotic as that was. But it wasn't something he had any control over. He felt like he was going insane. Only the wonderful, live saving feeling of Zero's presence, throbbing in his senses, of the other vampire's skin under his fingers, under his mouth as he trailed his lips across the boy's chest and stomach, was keeping him on this side of reason.
Zero's body was mottled in places from their earlier altercations and Kaname kissed the bruises tenderly. So strange... bruises that did not fade immediately. So frightening to think of such fragileness... Kaname buried his face against Zero's chest again, holding him close as another wave of barely controlled tremors tore through him. Deep, terrible mortification was also burning through the pureblood at his helplessness to control this bizarre, chemical despair and that wasn't helping his unbalanced emotional state one bit. A moment of sanity wavered by and he realized what he was doing to Zero. Was he really this desperate? Why couldn't he just get himself under control? He shook harder; he was nearly choking as he struggled to fight both this unnatural depression and the unbearable tug to use Zero to ward it off. But he couldn't do both... one or the other was going to have to win.
Zero caught Kaname's head between his hands, feeling the pureblood's anguished breaths echoing through him and against him. He understood now. He needed to distract Kaname, keep him focused on something other than whatever physical and mental effects the broken bond was having on him until... until what? Until it passed, hopefully. Zero had no idea, how was he supposed to know these things? Damn vampires and their oddities...
"Shhh... it's okay, Kaname..." he murmured soothingly, drawn irresistibly to comfort the other. "It will be all right. This has to pass, right? It's not real, so it has to pass, and it will... shh..." Zero dipped his head and mouthed Kaname's neck a bit hesitantly, licking at the bite area which he had a feeling Kaname would like.
Kaname did. Intensely apparently, because a shiver coursed through him as he leaned against Zero and he leaned eagerly into the touch, murmuring softly in a way that encouraged continuation. Slowly, Zero complied, licking and nibbling lightly at the graceful curve of the pureblood's neck, tracking his lips and tongue up and down the flawless ivory flesh in a slow trail of what he was trying not to refer to as kisses. It was just a tactic to keep Kaname distracted, that was all. He knew the pureblood's neck was a sensitive place. His own was. Zero wasn't really sure what to do and was pretty much winging things. Maybe if Kaname drank his blood it would make him feel better...?
As if reading his mind, Kaname's mouth had slid to Zero's neck, but he wasn't biting him. He was licking and caressing Zero in return. And yes... he was definitely kissing him.
Weird. Everything about this was weird. Zero wished he felt more uncomfortable. He didn't though, and that bothered him because instead it simply felt so... good.
Zero's breath escaped in a trembling rush against Kaname's neck as his mouth moved almost of its own accord in more fevered, urgent patterns against the pureblood's skin. He ached to taste... to touch... his fingers curled into the Kaname's shirt as he gripped the pureblood's upper arms tighter.
Kaname's hands slid across Zero's chest, pushing the now button-less shirt open further as he caressed sensually, hungrily. Kaname's body was still shaking and his breath hitched and hiccupped softly against Zero's skin every now and again as he kissed him, but it seemed that when he was thus occupied, the despair was easier to keep at bay.
Zero was consumed by the deep, unimaginable desire to be bitten. Kaname's mouth was kissing and teasing, but not biting him, and although he had never in a million years imagined he would feel this way, Zero ached to feel the other's teeth sinking into his flesh, to feel his blood being drawn. He also ached to do the same in return.
Lightly, he teased Kaname's neck with his fangs, as if to give him the idea... but his own teasing backfired and before he realized it, Zero felt his fangs breaking the skin and claiming the pureblood's neck and his blood. The beautiful taste took his senses and he felt like he was reeling, giddy from the intensity of the sensation.
Kaname's bite area on both sides of his throat had been throbbing wildly with empty, aching pain since Ichijo's death. When Zero kissed and licked him, it felt a bit better. When he unexpectedly sank his teeth in... it felt a lot better. Kaname's knees practically buckled from the mind-rending combination of sensual bliss and emotional agony that was warring inside him.
He gasped softly against Zero's neck, his body shaking from he knew not what anymore, all his feelings and sensations were becoming too mixed up to qualify or quantify. Didn't matter. All he cared about at the moment was how very, very much he wanted to bite the warm, delightful neck under his mouth. And there was no reason on earth why he shouldn't. It was almost strange to have something he wanted so intensely actually be achievable... to not feel he had to hold back or deny himself.
Zero groaned in pleasure as he finally felt Kaname's teeth in his neck, that unique sensation of having his blood drawn filling his senses as they fed on each other simultaneously. Zero had never fed and been fed upon at the same time before, neither had Kaname. It was a wholly unique and indescribable feeling. Truly, there was no way to quantify the shockingly deep, inexplicable kind of pleasure it gave, the blood-deep feeling of connectedness, of intimacy... of being one flesh with two hearts beating co-mingled blood through both bodies.
Zero couldn't breathe. Whatever he'd intended when he started this, however much he'd desired only to help Kaname... he was losing sight of all of that, very fast. His heart was racing and he wanted, needed more. He wanted to touch Kaname, and be touched in return... he wanted... dear heaven, he wanted to devour the pureblood completely in ways he couldn't even consciously comprehend because they were too foreign.
Even Kaname had not been prepared by how earth shatteringly incredible the mutual sharing of blood could be. Zero filled his senses completely, almost managing to block out the dark despair that was still trying to beat at him if he thought about it, if he didn't simply keep his every sense, his every thought and feeling tuned only to Zero. To the beat of his heart against Kaname's chest, the throb of his pulse as it spilled blood into Kaname's mouth, the soft, beautiful gasps of delight as their lips moved mutually against one another's skin, lost in a sea of vampire pleasure that no one else would ever have been able to understand.
Kaname drank greedily, deeply. He could, without fear of harming Zero, because Zero was latched onto his neck with equal hunger. There sensation of giving and taking was indescribable, it consumed him. At this moment, the pureblood wanted Zero more intensely than he felt he'd ever desired anything.
Zero devoured the pale, graceful neck, and he ached for more. He knew now, what it felt like, but he couldn't help himself – he slid his teeth free and bit down again, needing the delightful sensation of penetrating Kaname's flesh, repeatedly.
Kaname moaned and gasped softly against Zero's neck in pleasure. He knew by now, how Zero liked to do that, and interestingly enough, his body had learned to enjoy it. Of course it hurt, but it was a beautiful, delicious pain and right now every sensation was turning into pure bliss.
Gorged and intoxicated with sensual delight, Kaname finally lifted his head from Zero's neck a few minutes later. Zero was still busily enraptured with his neck and Kaname combed his fingers slowly through Zero's hair. "Zero..." he murmured huskily. The brown eyes were glazed and widely dilated. It was like a drug, these feelings... only so, so much better.
Reluctantly, Zero's head came up and their eyes met.
Kaname's gaze was drawn to the blood on Zero's mouth. Slowly, he leaned in, tongue lightly tracing the curve of Zero's lower lip as he lapped some of it up.
Zero felt his breath catch, almost failing him as his gaze held the pureblood's. He could get lost in the fire burning there... maybe he already was. Kaname's blood was throbbing through his veins, through his senses. It was a complete head-rush and he felt high as a kite – a kite sailing without a string in a gale. His body burned with a kind of yearning he almost didn't know how to handle. At this moment, he felt incredibly connected to the vampire in whose eyes he was getting lost.
Get a grip stupid... your only purpose here is to distract him... that's what he brought you for, that's what you agreed to. He's using you, that's all, this doesn't mean anything... a small voice inside Zero's skull was trying to make itself heard, but it was hard over the pounding in his ears.
"I-I think y-you're feeling better now..." the ex-human somehow managed to mumble out, hands sliding to Kaname's shoulders in a very half-hearted attempt to push him back. "We should, um..." But Zero couldn't seem to think what exactly it was they should do, because all his blood felt like it had pooled below the belt-line and was throbbing there so palpably it made trivial things like higher brain function seem impossible.
A bulldozer could not have dislodged Kaname at this moment, Zero's vague attempts certainly weren't about to do much. The pureblood easily captured Zero's hands in his, fingers intertwining, palms pressed together as he trapped Zero's hands back against the crate, on either side of the ex-human's head.
"We should what?" he murmured huskily, the low voice almost a purr. His face was still close to Zero's, his hot breath brushing the other's skin as he drank up the warmth of the hesitant but fiery passion flickering in the silver-red eyes. Kaname deliberately rocked his hips against Zero's, and the fact that both of them were very aroused was obvious.
Zero's eyes glazed and he arched back into the contact instinctively. He forgot whatever he'd been going to say. "We, um... we should... go..." he fought an uphill battle against himself for the words, his breath coming rapidly.
"It will be a while yet before the coast is clear... we have plenty of time," Kaname murmured back. There was the familiar look of a predator in his eyes again, but it excited Zero rather than scaring him this time.
Zero gulped softly, Kaname was still rocking against him and his mind was unraveling. "Plenty of time for what?" he demanded in a breathless whisper.
Kaname just looked at Zero, eyes intense, a small smile playing across his lips. He leaned in and slowly ran his tongue from Zero's collarbone to his ear, causing the other to shiver helplessly.
"I still need you, Zero..." he whispered against the velvety skin of the ex-human's earlobe, the pureblood's tongue and teeth playing lightly with the other's earrings. "All of you..."
As Kaname shifted his head back to look Zero in the face again, his heart and stomach were fluttering crazily, mingling with the intoxicating conflagration in his blood. They were playing with fire, this bond of theirs, and both were likely to get burned. Some part of Kaname knew... no matter what his well laid plans, no matter what his head tried to tell him, this wasn't only about using Zero for survival. Not anymore. Some part of him wanted Zero to know it too. He released Zero's right arm, his hand instead sliding to cup the other's cheek.
A fraction of an inch closer was all it took, and their lips met fully. Kaname kissed Zero very lightly, and at first Zero simply froze, an unreadable look firing through his eyes. For a moment, Kaname thought Zero would jerk away or possibly even try to hit him, but instead, the warm lips under his responded – hesitantly, very slowly, but they definitely responded.
For a moment, Zero very nearly did punch the other vampire for the sudden, incredibly intimate liberty he'd taken. It was weird, considering what they'd been doing, that it was this simplest of touches that wrung the most emotional reaction from him. But even so, Zero didn't try to move away. The touch of Kaname's lips on his felt like it had momentarily shorted his brain circuits. It was such a delicious sensation... he couldn't break away, despite a certain feeling of unnatural awkwardness. This was wrong on so many levels... he had certainly never imagined his first kiss like this. But... inexplicably... he found himself kissing Kaname back anyway. It was like his brain and body had completely severed ties, the latter happily doing as it pleased without the consent or approval of the former. He might have been tempted to blame it on Kaname, that the pureblood was influencing and controlling him – it certainly felt like an alien force had taken over his body. But somehow... that would never ring true. Deep down, Zero knew that at least at this moment, he wanted this too. His body was just being more honest than he was able to be consciously.
Kaname needed little encouragement and he leaned more hungrily into the kiss, his lips moving passionately against Zero's, his long fingers tangling in Zero's mussy silver locks. He physically ached for Zero, and he felt he could never manage to touch him enough to satisfy that ache. He kissed Zero deeply and passionately, lips parting, tongue exploring the exotic heat of his lover's mouth and playing against his fangs. Kaname was almost dizzy with the sensation and desire. He was overcome with the powerful urge to devour, but in an entirely different way than normal. He groaned softly as his body pressed up fully against Zero's, one hand remaining tangled in Zero's hair as the other slid down to sensually, urgently map the smooth contours of his chest.
It was a good thing Kaname had Zero pressed so firmly back against the crates behind him, because the ex-human's legs felt like limp noodles and he may not have been able to stand up on his own. The heat of Kaname's mouth, of his eyes, of his touch burned its way into Zero's skin and his consciousness in ways impossible to describe. Kaname seemed to have a lot less compunction about acting on his desires than Zero was experiencing, but slowly his own needs became too much to ignore. Slowly, Zero stopped just letting Kuran have his way and started responding in kind.
As Kaname's hand slid down to work the catch of his trousers, Zero started kissing him back in earnest, hesitation giving way to raw hunger. He would regret this later, he knew he would, but right now, none of that seemed to matter. His hands tangled in the soft hair at the back of Kaname's neck as he tugged him closer, tipping his head to explore more of his partner's mouth, to drink up the small, gasping groans of delight that were shuddering through the pureblood.
Zero bit Kaname's lower lip, somewhat accidentally, actually, in his urgent desire for contact. But Kaname reacted so beautifully that Zero did it again, intentionally. The pureblood's whole body shuddered against him and his eyes dilated sharply.
Kaname leaned more heavily into Zero, knees feeling like putty as he growled softly in his throat, tearing open the stubborn button on his partner's trousers, hand delving inside.
It was Zero's turn to gasp sharply and shudder.
