What Are You Doing the Rest of Your Life?
I DONT OWN IT
by Kristen Elizabeth
"Can I join you?"
If the Tennessee twang hadn't given him away, the sheer mass of the body that plopped down next to Jasper on the back porch steps would have. With his eyes still closed, Jasper lifted his shoulders. "Why not?"
Emmett glanced over at him. "I guess you don't feel like talking."
"You've guessed right."
The biggest member of the Cullen family squinted in the glare of the dying sun. "You ever gonna feel like talking?"
Jasper opened his eyes. "Did someone send you out here? Was it Carlisle?" He frowned. "Alice?"
"Hey, nobody sends me anywhere." Emmett hesitated, rethinking. "Well, Rose does, but that doesn't count." Jasper snorted. A moment passed before Emmett spoke again. "If I asked you a question and you answered it, would that count as us talking?"
"I believe that would be the very definition of us talking," Jasper muttered. He gave in with a sigh. He'd only known Emmett for three weeks, but he already knew the man wasn't the type to back down once he'd set his mind to something. "Ask your question."
"What was it like..." After a long search for the right wording, Emmett came up with, "...killing people?"
It wasn't a question Jasper had expected. Blinking, he stared at Emmett's genuinely curious expression. "You've never...?"
"Oh hell, yeah. I've slipped up." Embarrassed, Emmett scratched the top of his head. "Couple times, matter of fact. It was always a big deal, though. Once, we even had to move. So I'm just wonderin'...what's it like when it's not a big deal? When it's just...you know...the way you live?"
"What do you want to hear me say?" Jasper asked after a long minute of silent thought. "That it's easier than this life? Of course it is. There's no guilt. There are no consequences. Take what you want, drink when you will, deny yourself nothing." He paused. "It becomes so easy to forget who you were."
Emmett snorted. "Carlisle's always saying that. 'Remember who you are'."
"I didn't say 'are'. I said 'were'." Jasper watched the sun dip below the dark green fringe of trees. "When you live that life...when you feed from them and it isn't, as you say, a big deal, you can't be one of them anymore. You can't live like this," he said, indicating everything from the stately house behind them, to the expensive cars in the garage, to the Weejun loafers on Emmett's feet.
"Huh." Emmett pondered this for a second. "But you gave it all up for Shortcake."
Jasper ignored his use of Alice's brand-new nickname; she might have loved it, but he wasn't entirely comfortable with how quickly she'd become attached to the Cullens. "Does it matter why I did it?"
"Sure it does! 'Cause what we do ain't at all easy. There's a hell of a lot of guilt and a whole lot of consequences when you mess up. So if you don't got a real good reason for doin' it..."
"You probably wouldn't ever succeed," Jasper finished. "Or even try."
Emmett nodded. "That's my way of thinkin', at least."
They sat in silence until the sun disappeared behind the trees and stars began to appear on the dark blue twilight sky. Finally, when he sensed that Emmett could no longer stand the stillness and quiet, Jasper asked, "Why do you do it?"
"You gotta ask?" Emmett shrugged his massive shoulders. "But even if Rose didn't figure into it...I've still got family alive, you know? Brothers and sisters. I can't ever see 'em, but they're out there. And when I really stop and think about it...I don't think I could just kill without feeling at least a little bit bad about it. 'Cause everyone I kill is someone's brother or sister. You know?"
Instead of reply, Jasper stood. "I think I should hunt tonight." He looked down at Emmett. "Carlisle doesn't think I should go alone yet."
It wasn't exactly an invitation, but Emmett leapt to his feet with a grin. "Finally! I am so sick of hunting with Edward. You don't seem like you mind gettin' your shirt dirty." He lowered his voice. "Just between you and me, that kid really needs to loosen up. You know...with a woman."
Jasper smiled wryly. "The thought has occurred to me, as well."
Having seen Alice's vision of Jasper's teeth sinking into Linda's neck, Edward sprang forward only a split second after Jasper lunged. But he didn't get far before his path was cut short by Lenora. Quick and deadly, she tackled him to the ground and pinned him there, his head twisted to the side and kept down by one slender, but infinitely strong hand.
"Easy, pretty boy," she cooed into his ear. "And I won't be rough with you...unless that's what you want." He couldn't reply with her fingers digging into his cheek; all he could do was struggle to throw her off.
But Edward relaxed, even under Lenora's grip, when Carlisle reached Jasper at the exact second he stopped in his tracks, only inches away from Linda and her open wound.
Frozen, like he'd been struck by lightning, every muscle in Jasper's body was tightly corded with the effort it had taken him to come to a complete halt so close to the one thing in the world that would relieve his burning thirst.
He felt Carlisle's hand on his arm and although his first instinct was to throw it off, Jasper did nothing. The control he'd managed to gain over himself was so new and so tenuous...he had no idea how long it would last. If it didn't, as much as he hated to admit it, he would need Carlisle to hold him back.
"Jasper..." Alice's sweet voice called to him, but he couldn't quite bring himself to turn away from Linda as she stood in front of him, cradling her bleeding hand against her chest. "Jasper, please look at me."
Carlisle's voice was low and calm. "Keep talking to him," he urged Alice. "Help him stay connected."
But Silas spoke before she could continue. "How long can you hold out, Jasper?" Linda was too terrified to stop him from prying her hand open to show off the smeared blood and angry cut across her palm. He inhaled deeply, sighing with longing. "I'll bet she's sweet."
From her place on Edward's chest, Lenora shot Alice a wicked grin. "She reminds me of a bride Jasper and I shared once." Leaning down, she ran her tongue around the shell of Edward's ear, holding him even tighter when violently thrashed beneath her. "Virgins always taste better," she purred.
"Just do it, Jasper," Silas urged. "It'll be like riding a bicycle." In the blink of an eye, his tone changed from magnetic to malicious. "You won't be able to hold out for long. Everyone knows it. Look at them scrambling to stop you. If they believed in you at all, they'd let you be."
Carlisle took his hand off Jasper's arm. "I trust you," he said, taking a step back. "Trust yourself now. Prove him wrong."
Lenora snorted delicately. "If your so-called father is always this preachy, Edward, no wonder you've got so much..." Her hand trailed down his stomach and below his belt. "...energy that you're holding back." She lowered her lips to his. "We'll have to see if we can do something about that..."
If Jasper hadn't been so intensely focused on the most important battle of his life...the war with himself...he would have been shocked by the sudden force of Alice's rage. With a deep growl that belied her tiny figure, Alice threw herself at Lenora, teeth bared. The sudden attack caught Lenora off guard; the full weight of Alice's body slammed into her, knocking her off Edward. The two women landed on the cold, wet cavern floor as Edward sat up, rubbing his jaw.
"Get your filthy hands off my brother!" Alice snarled, grabbing a fist full of Lenora's hair and pulling hard enough to rip it out. "And don't ever..." She yanked even harder. "..ever so much as even think about Jasper again! He is not who you remember!"
Despite having Alice's fingers tangled in her hair, Lenora managed to get the smaller girl underneath her. She drew her hand back, preparing to strike Alice, but Edward caught her wrist before she could deliver the slap. With a sickening crunch of bone, he twisted her arm back far enough to snap it in half at the elbow joint.
Screaming wildly, Lenora staggered to her feet, her broken arm dangling limply at her side as she feebly clutched it with her good hand. As Edward helped Alice up, Lenora screamed at her, "Wise up, little girl! He will always be a killer! You can't cure him and you can't put him in a cage and you're a silly fool if you ever thought he'd change just for you!" Her blood-colored eyes burned with rage and pain. "Tell her, Jasper! You know it...you can't say it on your own, but it's there, in your head. Every day is hell for you...worse than any war ever could be! And you hate it! You want to give in so badly...you want to lose yourself in the kill and never..."
"No...I don't." Slowly, like any sudden movement would be his undoing, Jasper turned his head to coldly stare at Lenora. "I made this choice. She didn't make it for me. And my days might be harder now, but unlike the ones I spent with you and Maria, I'm grateful to be living them."
Silas laughed. "Oh, he has been with you for too long already, Carlisle. He's starting to sound just like you."
Carlisle's eyes narrowed. "He's a good man. And that's his own doing."
Jasper glanced at Carlisle. "I'm not as good as you think I am." Like a snake striking without warning, Jasper planted his fist in Silas' face, sending the older man flying backwards from the sheer force of the blow. He hit the hard cavern wall and slumped to the ground as Jasper took a big step away from Linda. "But I'm learning."
With a piece of Carlisle's shirt wrapped around Linda's hand, blocking the scent of her blood, Jasper let himself seek out the comfort of Alice's embrace. He had every intention of engulfing her in his arms, but when he reached her, his legs gave out from under him and he landed on his knees in front of her. Grasping her waist with one hand, he pulled her towards him until he could bury his face in the bodice of her dress. She let him stay like that for several minutes as she combed her fingers through his mane of tangled blonde waves, whispering his name softly.
No one noticed Marjorie watching them with tears in her eyes.
After tending to Linda, Carlisle looked the shivering, traumatized humans over for any other wounds. Finding none, he urged them to their feet. "You've all seen some things here that you were never meant to see," he told them. "What you choose to do with your new knowledge of the world is entirely up to you, but I would recommend..." He glanced at Lenora, cradling her arm, and Silas, still picking himself up off the ground. "Try to forget. It won't be easy, I know, but believe me, it's the best..."
"Johnny, don't do it!" Edward's sharp command had everyone, even Alice and Jasper, turning their heads to look at the boy they'd all forgotten. Edward slowly walked to the boy and crouched down, putting them at eye level. "You really don't want to do that," he told the boy.
Johnny's small face was twisted into a mask of confused rage. "You can't tell me what to do!" he childishly retorted. "I'm not a little kid anymore."
"No," Edward agreed. "Not really. But you see...if you hurt my father, I'm going to have to fight you. And I'm a lot bigger than you."
"Your father?" Johnny sniffed.
Edward nodded. "I know what you're thinking. You want to defend him." He glanced at Carlisle. "Make him proud of you." Looking back at Johnny, he continued, "But even fathers have to earn their son's respect. Really ask yourself...what has Silas done to be worthy of your loyalty?"
A minute dragged by as the small boy who should have been out playing catch in his yard, dreaming about being a professional baseball player when he grew up, considered Edward's words. "I don't know," he finally said, running the back of his hand under his nose.
Silas glared at Edward. "You think you can turn him against me?"
"I think you've already done that yourself," Carlisle told him. He turned back to the humans. "We're going to get you out of here and get you back to your families." His smile was calm and reassuring. "You're going to be just fine and..."
Once again, he was cut off, but this time by simultaneous gasps from Johnny and Alice. Jasper shot to his feet. "Alice? What is it?"
"Feet gliding over snow," she whispered.
Johnny blinked. "Five of them. Some are very old."
"They've traveled a long way." Alice's eyes were far away as she drew in a sharp gasp. "For a long time."
"Who, Alice?" Jasper asked, gently grasping her shoulders. "Who do you see?"
Frowning, Johnny added, "They have weird names. Afton. Demetri. Santiago."
It was enough for Carlisle. His pale face turned chalk-white and his eyes grew wide. "Oh, god help us," he murmured, pressing his palms together at his mouth. "Please."
Edward watched him intently. "You know who they are?" A second later, he heard the word in his father's thoughts. "No, it can't be..."
The smirk on Silas's face had disappeared, replaced now by a nervous twitch. "Carlisle?"
"We have to get them out of here." Carlisle frantically gestured to the humans. "Now!" He took a deep breath to calm himself. "The Volturi are coming."
Alice slowly shook her head. "No. The Volturi are here."
I DONT OWN IT
by Kristen Elizabeth
"Can I join you?"
If the Tennessee twang hadn't given him away, the sheer mass of the body that plopped down next to Jasper on the back porch steps would have. With his eyes still closed, Jasper lifted his shoulders. "Why not?"
Emmett glanced over at him. "I guess you don't feel like talking."
"You've guessed right."
The biggest member of the Cullen family squinted in the glare of the dying sun. "You ever gonna feel like talking?"
Jasper opened his eyes. "Did someone send you out here? Was it Carlisle?" He frowned. "Alice?"
"Hey, nobody sends me anywhere." Emmett hesitated, rethinking. "Well, Rose does, but that doesn't count." Jasper snorted. A moment passed before Emmett spoke again. "If I asked you a question and you answered it, would that count as us talking?"
"I believe that would be the very definition of us talking," Jasper muttered. He gave in with a sigh. He'd only known Emmett for three weeks, but he already knew the man wasn't the type to back down once he'd set his mind to something. "Ask your question."
"What was it like..." After a long search for the right wording, Emmett came up with, "...killing people?"
It wasn't a question Jasper had expected. Blinking, he stared at Emmett's genuinely curious expression. "You've never...?"
"Oh hell, yeah. I've slipped up." Embarrassed, Emmett scratched the top of his head. "Couple times, matter of fact. It was always a big deal, though. Once, we even had to move. So I'm just wonderin'...what's it like when it's not a big deal? When it's just...you know...the way you live?"
"What do you want to hear me say?" Jasper asked after a long minute of silent thought. "That it's easier than this life? Of course it is. There's no guilt. There are no consequences. Take what you want, drink when you will, deny yourself nothing." He paused. "It becomes so easy to forget who you were."
Emmett snorted. "Carlisle's always saying that. 'Remember who you are'."
"I didn't say 'are'. I said 'were'." Jasper watched the sun dip below the dark green fringe of trees. "When you live that life...when you feed from them and it isn't, as you say, a big deal, you can't be one of them anymore. You can't live like this," he said, indicating everything from the stately house behind them, to the expensive cars in the garage, to the Weejun loafers on Emmett's feet.
"Huh." Emmett pondered this for a second. "But you gave it all up for Shortcake."
Jasper ignored his use of Alice's brand-new nickname; she might have loved it, but he wasn't entirely comfortable with how quickly she'd become attached to the Cullens. "Does it matter why I did it?"
"Sure it does! 'Cause what we do ain't at all easy. There's a hell of a lot of guilt and a whole lot of consequences when you mess up. So if you don't got a real good reason for doin' it..."
"You probably wouldn't ever succeed," Jasper finished. "Or even try."
Emmett nodded. "That's my way of thinkin', at least."
They sat in silence until the sun disappeared behind the trees and stars began to appear on the dark blue twilight sky. Finally, when he sensed that Emmett could no longer stand the stillness and quiet, Jasper asked, "Why do you do it?"
"You gotta ask?" Emmett shrugged his massive shoulders. "But even if Rose didn't figure into it...I've still got family alive, you know? Brothers and sisters. I can't ever see 'em, but they're out there. And when I really stop and think about it...I don't think I could just kill without feeling at least a little bit bad about it. 'Cause everyone I kill is someone's brother or sister. You know?"
Instead of reply, Jasper stood. "I think I should hunt tonight." He looked down at Emmett. "Carlisle doesn't think I should go alone yet."
It wasn't exactly an invitation, but Emmett leapt to his feet with a grin. "Finally! I am so sick of hunting with Edward. You don't seem like you mind gettin' your shirt dirty." He lowered his voice. "Just between you and me, that kid really needs to loosen up. You know...with a woman."
Jasper smiled wryly. "The thought has occurred to me, as well."
Having seen Alice's vision of Jasper's teeth sinking into Linda's neck, Edward sprang forward only a split second after Jasper lunged. But he didn't get far before his path was cut short by Lenora. Quick and deadly, she tackled him to the ground and pinned him there, his head twisted to the side and kept down by one slender, but infinitely strong hand.
"Easy, pretty boy," she cooed into his ear. "And I won't be rough with you...unless that's what you want." He couldn't reply with her fingers digging into his cheek; all he could do was struggle to throw her off.
But Edward relaxed, even under Lenora's grip, when Carlisle reached Jasper at the exact second he stopped in his tracks, only inches away from Linda and her open wound.
Frozen, like he'd been struck by lightning, every muscle in Jasper's body was tightly corded with the effort it had taken him to come to a complete halt so close to the one thing in the world that would relieve his burning thirst.
He felt Carlisle's hand on his arm and although his first instinct was to throw it off, Jasper did nothing. The control he'd managed to gain over himself was so new and so tenuous...he had no idea how long it would last. If it didn't, as much as he hated to admit it, he would need Carlisle to hold him back.
"Jasper..." Alice's sweet voice called to him, but he couldn't quite bring himself to turn away from Linda as she stood in front of him, cradling her bleeding hand against her chest. "Jasper, please look at me."
Carlisle's voice was low and calm. "Keep talking to him," he urged Alice. "Help him stay connected."
But Silas spoke before she could continue. "How long can you hold out, Jasper?" Linda was too terrified to stop him from prying her hand open to show off the smeared blood and angry cut across her palm. He inhaled deeply, sighing with longing. "I'll bet she's sweet."
From her place on Edward's chest, Lenora shot Alice a wicked grin. "She reminds me of a bride Jasper and I shared once." Leaning down, she ran her tongue around the shell of Edward's ear, holding him even tighter when violently thrashed beneath her. "Virgins always taste better," she purred.
"Just do it, Jasper," Silas urged. "It'll be like riding a bicycle." In the blink of an eye, his tone changed from magnetic to malicious. "You won't be able to hold out for long. Everyone knows it. Look at them scrambling to stop you. If they believed in you at all, they'd let you be."
Carlisle took his hand off Jasper's arm. "I trust you," he said, taking a step back. "Trust yourself now. Prove him wrong."
Lenora snorted delicately. "If your so-called father is always this preachy, Edward, no wonder you've got so much..." Her hand trailed down his stomach and below his belt. "...energy that you're holding back." She lowered her lips to his. "We'll have to see if we can do something about that..."
If Jasper hadn't been so intensely focused on the most important battle of his life...the war with himself...he would have been shocked by the sudden force of Alice's rage. With a deep growl that belied her tiny figure, Alice threw herself at Lenora, teeth bared. The sudden attack caught Lenora off guard; the full weight of Alice's body slammed into her, knocking her off Edward. The two women landed on the cold, wet cavern floor as Edward sat up, rubbing his jaw.
"Get your filthy hands off my brother!" Alice snarled, grabbing a fist full of Lenora's hair and pulling hard enough to rip it out. "And don't ever..." She yanked even harder. "..ever so much as even think about Jasper again! He is not who you remember!"
Despite having Alice's fingers tangled in her hair, Lenora managed to get the smaller girl underneath her. She drew her hand back, preparing to strike Alice, but Edward caught her wrist before she could deliver the slap. With a sickening crunch of bone, he twisted her arm back far enough to snap it in half at the elbow joint.
Screaming wildly, Lenora staggered to her feet, her broken arm dangling limply at her side as she feebly clutched it with her good hand. As Edward helped Alice up, Lenora screamed at her, "Wise up, little girl! He will always be a killer! You can't cure him and you can't put him in a cage and you're a silly fool if you ever thought he'd change just for you!" Her blood-colored eyes burned with rage and pain. "Tell her, Jasper! You know it...you can't say it on your own, but it's there, in your head. Every day is hell for you...worse than any war ever could be! And you hate it! You want to give in so badly...you want to lose yourself in the kill and never..."
"No...I don't." Slowly, like any sudden movement would be his undoing, Jasper turned his head to coldly stare at Lenora. "I made this choice. She didn't make it for me. And my days might be harder now, but unlike the ones I spent with you and Maria, I'm grateful to be living them."
Silas laughed. "Oh, he has been with you for too long already, Carlisle. He's starting to sound just like you."
Carlisle's eyes narrowed. "He's a good man. And that's his own doing."
Jasper glanced at Carlisle. "I'm not as good as you think I am." Like a snake striking without warning, Jasper planted his fist in Silas' face, sending the older man flying backwards from the sheer force of the blow. He hit the hard cavern wall and slumped to the ground as Jasper took a big step away from Linda. "But I'm learning."
With a piece of Carlisle's shirt wrapped around Linda's hand, blocking the scent of her blood, Jasper let himself seek out the comfort of Alice's embrace. He had every intention of engulfing her in his arms, but when he reached her, his legs gave out from under him and he landed on his knees in front of her. Grasping her waist with one hand, he pulled her towards him until he could bury his face in the bodice of her dress. She let him stay like that for several minutes as she combed her fingers through his mane of tangled blonde waves, whispering his name softly.
No one noticed Marjorie watching them with tears in her eyes.
After tending to Linda, Carlisle looked the shivering, traumatized humans over for any other wounds. Finding none, he urged them to their feet. "You've all seen some things here that you were never meant to see," he told them. "What you choose to do with your new knowledge of the world is entirely up to you, but I would recommend..." He glanced at Lenora, cradling her arm, and Silas, still picking himself up off the ground. "Try to forget. It won't be easy, I know, but believe me, it's the best..."
"Johnny, don't do it!" Edward's sharp command had everyone, even Alice and Jasper, turning their heads to look at the boy they'd all forgotten. Edward slowly walked to the boy and crouched down, putting them at eye level. "You really don't want to do that," he told the boy.
Johnny's small face was twisted into a mask of confused rage. "You can't tell me what to do!" he childishly retorted. "I'm not a little kid anymore."
"No," Edward agreed. "Not really. But you see...if you hurt my father, I'm going to have to fight you. And I'm a lot bigger than you."
"Your father?" Johnny sniffed.
Edward nodded. "I know what you're thinking. You want to defend him." He glanced at Carlisle. "Make him proud of you." Looking back at Johnny, he continued, "But even fathers have to earn their son's respect. Really ask yourself...what has Silas done to be worthy of your loyalty?"
A minute dragged by as the small boy who should have been out playing catch in his yard, dreaming about being a professional baseball player when he grew up, considered Edward's words. "I don't know," he finally said, running the back of his hand under his nose.
Silas glared at Edward. "You think you can turn him against me?"
"I think you've already done that yourself," Carlisle told him. He turned back to the humans. "We're going to get you out of here and get you back to your families." His smile was calm and reassuring. "You're going to be just fine and..."
Once again, he was cut off, but this time by simultaneous gasps from Johnny and Alice. Jasper shot to his feet. "Alice? What is it?"
"Feet gliding over snow," she whispered.
Johnny blinked. "Five of them. Some are very old."
"They've traveled a long way." Alice's eyes were far away as she drew in a sharp gasp. "For a long time."
"Who, Alice?" Jasper asked, gently grasping her shoulders. "Who do you see?"
Frowning, Johnny added, "They have weird names. Afton. Demetri. Santiago."
It was enough for Carlisle. His pale face turned chalk-white and his eyes grew wide. "Oh, god help us," he murmured, pressing his palms together at his mouth. "Please."
Edward watched him intently. "You know who they are?" A second later, he heard the word in his father's thoughts. "No, it can't be..."
The smirk on Silas's face had disappeared, replaced now by a nervous twitch. "Carlisle?"
"We have to get them out of here." Carlisle frantically gestured to the humans. "Now!" He took a deep breath to calm himself. "The Volturi are coming."
Alice slowly shook her head. "No. The Volturi are here."