DERPY HOOVES/SWORD:
Derpy: I live with my alcoholic cousin.. I've seen worse.
Derpy: *bucks enamy in the throat, and throws him against the wall* I'm sorry. Did that hurt?
Derpy: (laughs) Worst, bedtime, story, ever!
Derpy: I'm bored.. Wanna open the window and scream hurtful comments towards on going people for no reason?
Game show host: Name something, that excits you?
Derpy: OHHH!! EATING A PEBBLE!!
Derpy: Cause I don't get killed by the first boss.
Derpy: Well.. People always say I have pretty eyes.. But still. There not suppose to be like this. I.. I had an accident. Jumped to hard on my bed. Should of lessened to Saten. My own fault.
Derpy: (seeing zombies attack and realizes she needs to get Saten mad at the zombies, so he would kill them) Um. Saten. te know T dog from Walking Dead?
Saten: Yeah.. He's my preferito character.
Derpy: Well.. He died.
Saten: NOO!!
Derpy: Got eaten da zombies
Saten: (enraged) FUCK THOSE ZOMBIES (attacks)
Derpy: (holding gun) I"LL KILL YOU!
Unknown: (making Derpy think he killed her husband) Look, just put down the gun... You wouldn't have the guts to kill m-
Derpy: (shoots him in both legs)
Unknown: .... Okay, your shoot me, but won't kill m-
Derpy: (shoots him in the head).
Derpy: Well, I guess I'll sit here an- (falls asleep before finishing).
(job interview)
Boss: So... You want a job?
Derpy: I tell you what I want... To sleep with your son!
Boss: ... Nobody's ever spoken to me like that.
Derpy: That's cause everybody is too distracted by the butt you call a face.
Boss: ............ Your hired.
Derpy: (disappointed) Shit.
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APPLEJACK TWIST:
AJ: You kidding.. He use to get drunk when ALREADY drunk... He even threw up on my tail.. Twice.
AJ: You took my Saten! Where is he!
Gangster: I ain't telling you shit!
AJ: Prehaps you didn't hear me... (punches him in the face violently) WHERE IS HE!!
Saten: I'm gonna miss having applejack though
AJ: But I'm wait here
Saten: No.. I meant the drink.
AJ: What drink.
Saten: Applejack.
AJ: *annoyed* What!?
Saten: No. Applejack is a type of alcohol.
AJ: Oh.. Right.. Silly me.
AJ: I told you not to print that story! Now everybody thinks I'm a slut!
Flashwave: But you ARE a slut!.. I'm just helping people to see it!
Pinkie: (there to comfort AJ) Shut up! No she's not!
Flashwave: (punches her) Stay outta this you dumb pink bitch!
AJ: (angrily) HEY!!
Flashwave: (blows raspberry)
AJ: Apologize to her, NOW!!
Flashwave: I don't have to lesson to you.. Dumb slut!
AJ: I may be a slut but I know how to kill a man.. Painfully!
Flashwave: Yeah, sure thing, ugly whore.
AJ: (eye twitches) Can you put your hoof on counter?
Flashwave: (Does so) Your not gonna try and find a way to have sex with it, are you, local slut?
AJ: (staves a knife into his hoof, making it stuck on the counter)
Flashwave: (Groans in pain) You goddamn bitch
Pinkie: (recording this) (this is hilarious).
Flashwave: You fucking bitch (Tries to get the knife out of his hoof)
AJ: (smashes his face against the counter breaking nose).
Flashwave: You goddamn bitch (Keeps trying to get the knife out of him)
AJ: (unaware Pinkie is recording this) Sorry you have to see this Pinkie
Pinkie: Oh, come on. I'm enjoying this
AJ: Really?
Pinkie: Hey, that Cupcakes fanfic wasn't ENTIRELY false
Flashwave: Pinkie is a slut as wel-
AJ: (LITERARY stabs him in the back)
Flashwave: (Screams in pain) You goddamn bitch
Flashwave: (dead with multiple stab wounds)
AJ: (shocked of her own actions) Where the hell did that come from?
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Pinkie: Well, it happens
AJ: AJ: Well, ya know... Didn' your parents have that talk about the birds and the bees when you were younger'?
Sword: Your actually pretty hot when I see you properly. How come we never hooked up?
AJ: You said you'd rather jump head first into an active volcano.
Sword: ... Oh.
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Here's scenes I forgot to add for best of Saten and Ditto and Sword..
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SATEN:
Saten: Well girl's we killed the bottle.
AJ: I had half a glass.
Pinkie: I didn't have any-
Saten: Okay! Don't judge me!
AJ: (nuzzling Saten lovingly)
Saten: Huh.. That's so adorable, your like a cat. Only cuter.
Pinkie: (after battle) Umm.. Saten.
Saten: (sees a knife stabbed into him) Holly shit, when did I get stabbed!?... That's fuckin AWESOME!!
Saten: (to AppleBloom's new boyfriend) Lesson here.. I want you to remember, that little girl was always like a daughter to me. So I don't want any funny business. Because you make her cry, (shows fist) I make you cry!
(Doctor Phil spoof)
Phil McGraw: Okay.. So here's our next guest. Saten Twist.
Saten: Yeah. I've been a bit off lately.
Phil: Yes. I looked at your files.. And I must say.. There are 13 signs, to a psychopath.. But you have 29 of them.
Saten: (offended) Well. That's not very nic-
Phil: How dose your wife handle it?
Saten: Can you please leave AppleJack out of this.
Phil: Say? What's her number?
Saten: (gets up angrily) MotherFUCKER!
Phil: (nervous) ... Saten Twist everyone! (audience cheers)
Saten: I HATE YOU ALL!! (audience claps even MORE).
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DITTO:
una: Say.. What happened to the escaping prisoner?
Ditto: Well.. I hit him with my car.
Luna: You hit him!?
Ditto: Yep.
Luna: You ran over, a fellow pony!?
Ditto: Sure did,
Luna: But.. What about Celestia's rule!?
Ditto: ... Didn't kill him.
(shows the prisoner in the hospital, everything but his head is bandaged up)
Prisoner: (to nurse) You wanna know. How I got these scars!?
Nurse: (heard it before) Hmm,. From Ditto?
Prisoner: From, Ditto!!
Celestia: Ditto, dear, we need your help again.
Ditto: (groans) fine... (sarcastically) someone better be dying!
(skips ahead a bit)
Sick pony: I'm dying!
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MASTER SWORD:
Derpy: It's not ALWAYS about the woman you know.
Sword: huh.
Derpy: What?
Sword: Nothing. Just, rethinking my whole... Entire life
(sword playing golf on natural television)
Sword: Alright., ball. Time to go home.. (misses and starts yelling at the ball) You little son of a (bleep). Why couldnt you just go HOME!? That is your HOME! You too good for your HOME!? ANSWER MEEEE!!!!
Sword: (throws the flag in anger) SUCK MY GREEN ASS BALL!! (the flag knocks over one of the camera man's)
Sword: (pacing and enraged) (bleep)ED WITH THE WRONG MOTHER(bleep)ER! (literary EVERY word is being bleeped out)
Sword: and that. Derpy.. Is how I got my wallet back from those crazy, insane aliens.
Sword: (first hearing of Saten's crush on AJ from Derpy having told him).. I see... Excuse me Derpy, I gotta make a phone call... (off view) Hey Red Head! I heard you have a crush on some cow girl!
Saten: (stupidly from other side of phone) WHO IS THIS!? HOW YOU GETTING THIS INFOMATION!?
Derpy: Who are you!?
Pony: My name i- (gets shot dead)
Derpy: (angrily to Sword) YOU SHOT HIM!
Sword: (holding gun) duaa. That's what guns are FOR!
Sword: If you don't shut up! I'll rip off your fuckin legs and beat you to death with them!!
Derpy: I can never help but imagine what kinda person you would of became, if it weren't for me..
(vision)
Sword: (gang leader) Alright boys! Let's rob the bank! Give the money to the poor, then rob the poor AND SHOOT THE MONEY!! (he and the gang all cheer)
Derpy: What happened to the AlexMane guy?
Sword: He's being handled by top men.
Derpy: Who?
Sword: TOP men.
Sword: When you get to hell! Tell em Master Sword sent ya!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
THE END:
That's all of them..
Please comment
:)
Derpy: I live with my alcoholic cousin.. I've seen worse.
Derpy: *bucks enamy in the throat, and throws him against the wall* I'm sorry. Did that hurt?
Derpy: (laughs) Worst, bedtime, story, ever!
Derpy: I'm bored.. Wanna open the window and scream hurtful comments towards on going people for no reason?
Game show host: Name something, that excits you?
Derpy: OHHH!! EATING A PEBBLE!!
Derpy: Cause I don't get killed by the first boss.
Derpy: Well.. People always say I have pretty eyes.. But still. There not suppose to be like this. I.. I had an accident. Jumped to hard on my bed. Should of lessened to Saten. My own fault.
Derpy: (seeing zombies attack and realizes she needs to get Saten mad at the zombies, so he would kill them) Um. Saten. te know T dog from Walking Dead?
Saten: Yeah.. He's my preferito character.
Derpy: Well.. He died.
Saten: NOO!!
Derpy: Got eaten da zombies
Saten: (enraged) FUCK THOSE ZOMBIES (attacks)
Derpy: (holding gun) I"LL KILL YOU!
Unknown: (making Derpy think he killed her husband) Look, just put down the gun... You wouldn't have the guts to kill m-
Derpy: (shoots him in both legs)
Unknown: .... Okay, your shoot me, but won't kill m-
Derpy: (shoots him in the head).
Derpy: Well, I guess I'll sit here an- (falls asleep before finishing).
(job interview)
Boss: So... You want a job?
Derpy: I tell you what I want... To sleep with your son!
Boss: ... Nobody's ever spoken to me like that.
Derpy: That's cause everybody is too distracted by the butt you call a face.
Boss: ............ Your hired.
Derpy: (disappointed) Shit.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
APPLEJACK TWIST:
AJ: You kidding.. He use to get drunk when ALREADY drunk... He even threw up on my tail.. Twice.
AJ: You took my Saten! Where is he!
Gangster: I ain't telling you shit!
AJ: Prehaps you didn't hear me... (punches him in the face violently) WHERE IS HE!!
Saten: I'm gonna miss having applejack though
AJ: But I'm wait here
Saten: No.. I meant the drink.
AJ: What drink.
Saten: Applejack.
AJ: *annoyed* What!?
Saten: No. Applejack is a type of alcohol.
AJ: Oh.. Right.. Silly me.
AJ: I told you not to print that story! Now everybody thinks I'm a slut!
Flashwave: But you ARE a slut!.. I'm just helping people to see it!
Pinkie: (there to comfort AJ) Shut up! No she's not!
Flashwave: (punches her) Stay outta this you dumb pink bitch!
AJ: (angrily) HEY!!
Flashwave: (blows raspberry)
AJ: Apologize to her, NOW!!
Flashwave: I don't have to lesson to you.. Dumb slut!
AJ: I may be a slut but I know how to kill a man.. Painfully!
Flashwave: Yeah, sure thing, ugly whore.
AJ: (eye twitches) Can you put your hoof on counter?
Flashwave: (Does so) Your not gonna try and find a way to have sex with it, are you, local slut?
AJ: (staves a knife into his hoof, making it stuck on the counter)
Flashwave: (Groans in pain) You goddamn bitch
Pinkie: (recording this) (this is hilarious).
Flashwave: You fucking bitch (Tries to get the knife out of his hoof)
AJ: (smashes his face against the counter breaking nose).
Flashwave: You goddamn bitch (Keeps trying to get the knife out of him)
AJ: (unaware Pinkie is recording this) Sorry you have to see this Pinkie
Pinkie: Oh, come on. I'm enjoying this
AJ: Really?
Pinkie: Hey, that Cupcakes fanfic wasn't ENTIRELY false
Flashwave: Pinkie is a slut as wel-
AJ: (LITERARY stabs him in the back)
Flashwave: (Screams in pain) You goddamn bitch
Flashwave: (dead with multiple stab wounds)
AJ: (shocked of her own actions) Where the hell did that come from?
Add a comment
Pinkie: Well, it happens
AJ: AJ: Well, ya know... Didn' your parents have that talk about the birds and the bees when you were younger'?
Sword: Your actually pretty hot when I see you properly. How come we never hooked up?
AJ: You said you'd rather jump head first into an active volcano.
Sword: ... Oh.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's scenes I forgot to add for best of Saten and Ditto and Sword..
-------------------------------------------------------------------
SATEN:
Saten: Well girl's we killed the bottle.
AJ: I had half a glass.
Pinkie: I didn't have any-
Saten: Okay! Don't judge me!
AJ: (nuzzling Saten lovingly)
Saten: Huh.. That's so adorable, your like a cat. Only cuter.
Pinkie: (after battle) Umm.. Saten.
Saten: (sees a knife stabbed into him) Holly shit, when did I get stabbed!?... That's fuckin AWESOME!!
Saten: (to AppleBloom's new boyfriend) Lesson here.. I want you to remember, that little girl was always like a daughter to me. So I don't want any funny business. Because you make her cry, (shows fist) I make you cry!
(Doctor Phil spoof)
Phil McGraw: Okay.. So here's our next guest. Saten Twist.
Saten: Yeah. I've been a bit off lately.
Phil: Yes. I looked at your files.. And I must say.. There are 13 signs, to a psychopath.. But you have 29 of them.
Saten: (offended) Well. That's not very nic-
Phil: How dose your wife handle it?
Saten: Can you please leave AppleJack out of this.
Phil: Say? What's her number?
Saten: (gets up angrily) MotherFUCKER!
Phil: (nervous) ... Saten Twist everyone! (audience cheers)
Saten: I HATE YOU ALL!! (audience claps even MORE).
-------------------------------------------------------------------
DITTO:
una: Say.. What happened to the escaping prisoner?
Ditto: Well.. I hit him with my car.
Luna: You hit him!?
Ditto: Yep.
Luna: You ran over, a fellow pony!?
Ditto: Sure did,
Luna: But.. What about Celestia's rule!?
Ditto: ... Didn't kill him.
(shows the prisoner in the hospital, everything but his head is bandaged up)
Prisoner: (to nurse) You wanna know. How I got these scars!?
Nurse: (heard it before) Hmm,. From Ditto?
Prisoner: From, Ditto!!
Celestia: Ditto, dear, we need your help again.
Ditto: (groans) fine... (sarcastically) someone better be dying!
(skips ahead a bit)
Sick pony: I'm dying!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
MASTER SWORD:
Derpy: It's not ALWAYS about the woman you know.
Sword: huh.
Derpy: What?
Sword: Nothing. Just, rethinking my whole... Entire life
(sword playing golf on natural television)
Sword: Alright., ball. Time to go home.. (misses and starts yelling at the ball) You little son of a (bleep). Why couldnt you just go HOME!? That is your HOME! You too good for your HOME!? ANSWER MEEEE!!!!
Sword: (throws the flag in anger) SUCK MY GREEN ASS BALL!! (the flag knocks over one of the camera man's)
Sword: (pacing and enraged) (bleep)ED WITH THE WRONG MOTHER(bleep)ER! (literary EVERY word is being bleeped out)
Sword: and that. Derpy.. Is how I got my wallet back from those crazy, insane aliens.
Sword: (first hearing of Saten's crush on AJ from Derpy having told him).. I see... Excuse me Derpy, I gotta make a phone call... (off view) Hey Red Head! I heard you have a crush on some cow girl!
Saten: (stupidly from other side of phone) WHO IS THIS!? HOW YOU GETTING THIS INFOMATION!?
Derpy: Who are you!?
Pony: My name i- (gets shot dead)
Derpy: (angrily to Sword) YOU SHOT HIM!
Sword: (holding gun) duaa. That's what guns are FOR!
Sword: If you don't shut up! I'll rip off your fuckin legs and beat you to death with them!!
Derpy: I can never help but imagine what kinda person you would of became, if it weren't for me..
(vision)
Sword: (gang leader) Alright boys! Let's rob the bank! Give the money to the poor, then rob the poor AND SHOOT THE MONEY!! (he and the gang all cheer)
Derpy: What happened to the AlexMane guy?
Sword: He's being handled by top men.
Derpy: Who?
Sword: TOP men.
Sword: When you get to hell! Tell em Master Sword sent ya!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
THE END:
That's all of them..
Please comment
:)
Well.. I'll say Sword was right about it being sad again.
But that would lead too him say
"I told you so"
And I'll say
"Don't have too rub it in"
And he'll say
"Yes I do"
And than he'll pour coffee onto me.
And I'll say
"Dick"
And he'll say
"Thank you"
either way.. I'm enjoying the funny episode while I can. Before I have too start crying again.
This show is doing anything it can too depress us. Like it's the shows job.. Too kick us in the balls and say "Life sucks, deal with it"
The show is an asshole.
But that would lead too him say
"I told you so"
And I'll say
"Don't have too rub it in"
And he'll say
"Yes I do"
And than he'll pour coffee onto me.
And I'll say
"Dick"
And he'll say
"Thank you"
either way.. I'm enjoying the funny episode while I can. Before I have too start crying again.
This show is doing anything it can too depress us. Like it's the shows job.. Too kick us in the balls and say "Life sucks, deal with it"
The show is an asshole.