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#1:
POST: I don't want my baby boy to he straight, I want it gay.. If it's straight, I'll put it to adoption straight away!
ME: Don't worry little lady. If your the kids first impression of what a woman is, he'll either be gay or a serial killer..


#2:
POST: I'm bored.. Somebody fuck be.
ME: I would, but you might cough on me, and I might catch your stupid.


#3:
POST: How do Christians reproduce, if they think sex is a sin, how do they have babies!?
ME: No, no, your mistaking Christians for temblr feminists., they consider you a rapist for "having a penis"


#4:
POST: Who trying to get me pregnant? I'll abort it by summer.
ME: Good idea, don't want more of your kind running around.


#5:
POST: Having the flu ain'r gonna stop me from being a slut :)
ME: You know what also has flu symptoms? HIV. What do you get from being a slut? HIV. What do you deserve for being a slut? A shovel to the face. What you thought I was gonna say HIV? I'm not a monster.


#6:
POST: So I accidantly drank my sons pee.. Tastes even better than my husbands pee.. I love golden showers!
ME:



#7:
POST: Today my science teacher threw his dead cart in the freezer, so we had to clean it. #Gross.
ME: #NoShit!.. If your a professor.. Your cat died.. And you put in a freezer so other have to clean.. You shouldn't be a professor!.. You shouldn't even be a alive.


#8:
POST: Korn has the best songs, "I wander out where you can't see
Inside my shell I wait and bleeeeed!!"
ME: That's Slipknot you, fucking, idiot!


#9:
POST: My kid is NEVER gonna watch Skrek! Disagree all you want! Beautiful people don't go with ugly people! My daughter would grow up thinking she should change cause some ugly boy likes her! Why didn't Shrek change for Fiena!? Beautiful people are strong, ugly people are not! Why couldn't he change for Fiona!? Because woman have to do everything!
ME: Try watching SHREK 2, dumbass.


#10:
POST: GTA V sucks, GTA 5 is better.
ME: Some people can't wake up in the morning without a daily dose of STUPID!!


#11:
POST: How old do you have to be to watch porn? I'm a 11 year old, who has a 16 year olf brother who always wants me to watch porn with him.
ME: All that question does is make me wanna punch your brother.


#12:
POST: So my roommate and I watch porn every night.. Now he keeps wanting to masterbate in front of me. Is this normal?
ME: Not if your gay.. And weird!
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Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hello everypony, and-
Master Sword: *Coughs*
Tom: Goddammit!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: You interrupted me!
Master Sword: Not on purpose!!
Tom: Yes it was on purpose. You know what I'm going to do?
Master Sword: *Terrified* What?
Tom: I'm gonna forget this whole thing happened, and move right along to Brony Of The Month.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Who is Brony of the month this time?
Tom: WWEChampion16....
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