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posted by Canada24
9 AND A HALF YEARS AGO:

Michael is one the many people standing in line at the North Yankton bank.

Michael: Man.. Where's Dr. Kevorkian when you need him?

Lady: Well, if I know doctors, he's probably golfing.

Michael: (chuckles) good one.

Lady: Thanks mister.. I got 'more' jokes in you want?

Michael: Maybe later.

Trevor: (arrives, holding a present box)

Michael: (polite voice to the lady from before) Excuse me for a second.. (suddenly his calm demeanour is changed to an angry one, as he fires a loaded handgun into the air) EVERYONE ON THE FUCKIN FLOOR!

Trevor: (reveals that the present box was REALLY carrying an MP5) THIS IS A ROBBERY!.. (stands closer to Michael) And.. Not a separate robbery we're together.

Guard: You mean like a couple?

Trevor: No!.. Well, in a way.

Voice: We're being robbed by Johnny and Clyde!

Michael: SHUT UP! (fires more bullets to shut them up).

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Two cops heard the gunfire, and saw Brad run in after being late.

Cop: Uh Banson looks like we got an 64-G in progress.

Cop 2: (confused stare).

Cop: Armed robbery with a gun!

Cop 2: (confused stare)

Cop: (draws picture of a stickman robing another stickman with a pistol) Come on man, you know this.

Cop 2: Ohh, a shooty-stealy!

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Guard: (reaches for alarm).

Trevor: Don't touch that alarm! (shoots it, ironically triggering it) DAMN IT!

Another guard comes in.

Guard 2: (enters from main door) Ohh I'm so excited, first day as a security guar-

Brad: (panics and shooting guard 2 dead with his AP Pistol).

Guard 2: Crap. (dies).

Brad: (examines the body and begins to panic) Oh shit! Now it's murder man! IT'S MURDER!

Michael: Just rel-

Brad: FUCK THAT! (jumps though the glass window) I WANNA LIVE! (lands on the highway, and gets ran over by a OC Transpo bus).

Michael: SHIT!.. Trevor! Brad is dead!

Trevor: Very funny Michael.

Michael: I'm serious, there's pieces of him everywh-

Trevor: (ignores him and points gun at cashier) GIVE ME THE MONEY!

Cashier: (gives him it).

Trevor: (looks in it but it explodes) AHH! DYE PACK!.. (Trevor tries to get a tissue, but the tissue box is also a dye pack. Enraged, he then hits a bank teller, who turns out to also be a dye pack).

Trevor: Is anyone NOT a dye pack?.. Speak now and I won't shoot.

Guy: I a- (gets shot in the arm). You sa-

Trevor: I lied.

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LATER:

Trevor: This way to the chopper!

Michael: No!.. Stick to the fuckin plan. Follow me.. (suddenly gets shot by sniper).. (poor acting skills) AHH! Lights fading, limbs growing cold.. I see a tunnel.. Must. Move. Toward the light.

Trevor: Michael, just hang on.

Michael: (poorly imitating Christopher Walken) Mother?.. Is that you?.. Your little boy.. Is coming home!

Trevor: ... How hard did he hit you exactly?

Michael: (whispers) Rose-buds.. (pretends to be dead).

Trevor: Michael.. I see you breathing, cut it ou- (gets shot at).

Trevor: I ain't leaving this spot!

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Trevor ironically is running as far away from the spot as he could.
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