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(To Will after being accused of doing drugs) I'll pee in a cup! I'll pee. (Pilot)

(To Football Players) I'm not afraid of being called a loser because I can accept that's what I really am. (Pilot)

Quinn: If you quit the club, I'll let you touch my breast.
Finn: Under the shirt?
Quinn: Over the bra. (Showmance)

Well, when I first joined, I thought you were kind of insane. I mean, you talk way more than you should and to be honest, I looked under the bed to see if you were hiding there. But...then I heard you sing and you touched something in me. (Showmance)

Do you see anyone else with a plate of "I'm sorry" cookies? I don't, just you. (Acafellas)
    
(To Will) Hey check this out. I got this from the library. Did you know you can just borrow books from there? (Preggers)

Finn: Do you know what we should do?
Rachel: Elope?
Finn: What?
Rachel: Nothing. (The Rhodes Not Taken)

Rachel: I'm sleeping with him.
Finn: So am I!.... This play's weird. (The Rhodes Not Taken)

Rachel: I'm sorry for calling you contemptible and deplorable.
Finn: That's okay. I didn't even know what those words meant. (Vitamin D)

Rachel: I feel terrible. Even if we win it won't be satisfying.
Finn: I know. I don't even remember performing.(Vitamin D)

(To Quinn) I came up with the best baby name of all-time: Drizzle. (Throwdown)

I don't think any one decision makes your life. Unless you invent some sort of zombie virus or something. (Mash-Up)

( Finn about to give Kurt a slushie facial) Kurt: Do it.
Finn: I don’t really want to, honestly. I know how picky you are about the products you use on your face.
Kurt: But you’ve been getting so much pressure from the gorillas on the football team. I guess they didn’t appreciate me resigning from the team and choosing Glee.
Finn: Probably would’ve went over better if you didn’t announce it in the showers. (Mash-Up)

(About sunglasses) It’s like you can’t see their eyes so they have all the power. I could be looking at your boobs and you’d have no idea. (Mash-Up)

Mr. Schue, kids are busier than when you went here. We've got homework, and football, teen pregnancy... lunch. (Wheels)

(In his thoughts) I never noticed how nice Rachel's butt is. Crap, I think Quinn knows I'm staring at it. (Ballad)
    
(On the phone with Kurt at the Fabray's)I have to go. They'll think I'm pooping. (Ballad)

Finn: I'm sick and tired of people pushing me to be somebody I'm not.
Kurt: You're lashing out at me is fantastically compelling and inappropriate. (Ballad)

(To Rachel on her makeover) I'm gonna say this as nice as I possibly can. But you look like a sad clown hooker. (Hairography)

(To Rachel) The guys said if I took the Glee club photo, they'd make me choose between a Hitler mustache and buck teeth. And I can't rock either of those looks. (Mattress)

Finn: I miss getting hit.
Kurt: Pure boyish insanity. (Home)

Rachel: (about doctor) What if he says I'll never sing again? I mean, who am I without my voice? I-I'm just this-- spoiled annoying only child--"
Finn: Don't say that; there's like, so many awesome things about you.
Rachel: Like?
Finn: *pauses* Um... look he's not gonna say you'll never sing again (Laryngitis)
    
Kurt: Could you have a word with Azimio and Karofsky about harassing me without damaging my Gaga outfit?
Finn: Are you serious? Do you know how difficult it is with those guys? They already think we're boyfriends. (Theatricality)

Terri: I have compulsive need to crush other people's dreams.
Finn: Yeah, that's what Mr. Schue said. (Funk)

(To Mr. Schue) At the beginning of the year... I...I didn't have a father. Someone I could model myself after. Show me what it really means to be a man. (Journey)

Finn: Rachel is what you'd call a controlist.
Rachel: I'm controlling. Controlist isn't a word. (Audition)

(About Rachel's new look) I think that guy just broke up with his girlfriend just so he could stare at you. (Britney/Brittany)

Finn: How do you feel about me not being on the football team anymore?
Rachel: I kinda like it. I don't have to fantasize about what song I'd sing at your bedside if you were in a coma. (Britney/Brittany)

(To Rachel) Come here. This is how it's going to happen. I'm going to be quarterback again and I'm going to throw a touchdown in our first game. Then I'm going to point to you in the stands so that everyone in this school knows that you're my girlfriend. All right? (Britney/Brittany)

(While praying) I need to ask you something. I'm dating Rachel. She's great but she's kind of a prude. I'm kind of going crazy. Her boobs aren't great but they're still girl boobs and I would really like to touch them. I've dedicated a week of my musical life to you. I hope you can see it in your heart to answer my prayers. (Grilled Cheesus)

(To Sam) I'm with Rachel now. She's a lot shorter than Quinn and she talks a lot, but I love her. (Duets)

Rachel: I'm only really generous if there's something in it for me.
Finn: Yeah. But I still like you. (Duets)

Finn: Coach Beiste, we think you’re awesome. And even though you’re all hard and tough on the outside, it doesn’t mean you’re not the opposite on the inside.
Sam: Like a chocolate turtle.
Finn: Totally. You’re nougaty. (Never Been Kissed)

(To Kurt) In Glee Club whenever two of us got together we got a nickname. Rachel and I are Finchel. Rachel and Puck were Puckleberry. And today a new union is formed: Furt. You and I, man. We’re brothers from another mother. (Furt)

Rachel: You said you'd never break up with me.
Finn: I never thought you'd make me feel like this. (Special Education)

Funny, Karofsky, how you call everyone gay all the time. But you never seem to have a girlfriend. (The Sue Sylvester Bowl Shuffle)

Finn: We used to be best friends.
Puck: Before I got your girlfriend pregnant and made out with your other girlfriend. (The Sue Sylvester Bowl Shuffle)

(To Karofsky) Can we not fight for just one day? It’s already hard enough not to kick you in the nuts every time I see you. (The Sue Sylvester Bowl Shuffle)

Rachel: She's prettier than me.
Finn: Would you stop? ... You're beautiful. (Silly Love Songs)

(To kissing booth girls) Brush and floss time. Gotta keep up the oral hygiene if I’m gonna satisfy all of you. (Silly Love Songs)

(To Glee boys) You guys do realize that Justin Bieber sucks, right? (Comeback)

Rachel: I've never even had a drink.
Finn: Seriously? No wonder I never got past second base. (Blame It on the Alcohol)

Okay, Rachel, since this is your first time at this I'm gonna break it down for you. Guys and girls fall into certain archetypes when they get drunk. Exhibit A, Santana, the weepy, hysterical drunk, Lauren Zizes and Quinn, the angry girl drunks, Brittany, also known as the girl who turns into a stripper drunk, Mercedes and Tina, happy girl drunks, and then we come around full circle right back to you, Rachel, and right now you're being the needy girl drunk, hanging all over me, being all lovey, it's not cool. (Blame It on the Alcohol)
    
(On Holly teaching Sex Ed) Finn: Cucumbers can give you AIDS?
Mercedes: No way, I just had one in my salad. (Sexy)

Quinn: Even if we win that or even Nationals that isn't gunna put us back where we belong.
Finn: Which is where...?
Quinn: On top!
Finn: On top of what...? (Original Song)

(To Kurt about his tuxedo) Dude, that rocks! It's like Gay Braveheart. (Prom Queen)

Hey Jesse, did you order scrambled eggs? Last time I checked you liked them served on people's heads. (Prom Queen)

(Upon breaking up with Quinn) Finn: Don't you feel anything anymore? This is real. This is happening.
Quinn: Are you happy now? Is this me feeling enough for you?
Finn: I-I'm sorry, I still love yo-
Quinn: Just don't touch me!(Funeral)

(To Rachel) Wait, this is the moment in those romantic comedies where I kiss you. (New York)
    
(To Jesse) Dude, back off; you're just jealous. Jealous of what we have, and what we shared with the entire audience because it was shared between two people who love each other. It was the Superman of kisses! It came with its own cape, right Rachel? (New York)
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