After I've made some black tea to help you wake up,
I shall bake some bread and make some omelet.
Those servants who are useless and can't do anything right,
I shall grill some burn marks onto them as well, severely.

I shall put a shirt on you, button it, tie a ribbon,
help you put on your socks, and finish with your eye-patch.
THIS, is my master Lord Ciel Phantomhive.

How can this kind of spot have a bunch of disarranged bed hair!
And what a stubborn bundle it is!
Does bed hair act just like its master or something?
It doesn't listen to what I say at all!

I do think that some punishment is in order...
a water sprayer, spray, spray, spray, spray!
It's already so wet from my water torture,
but it still retains its obstinate curves.
It's more insistent than any death god,
but I'll just stretch and straighten it a little bit,
and then when I use a comb on it...
Voila! A shiny angel's halo!

"As the butler of the Phantomhive House,
if I can't even straighten out some bed hair,
what would I ever be able do?"

I must take care of everything very swiftly;
that's how I do my job every day.
I also must carry out the assassinations instantly;
yes, that's a demon's real state of affairs.

"After breakfast you will meet Professor Hugues,
who is very knowledgeable about how to be an emperor.
In the afternoon, a dance lesson, a business negotiation...
roughly five tasks. Is that all right, Young Master?"

Master is so busy that he often writhes in pain,
as he checks and checks the documents with sideways glances.
If the guests look too suspicious,
I shall make sure to give them some precarious treatment.
When night's darkness has descended,
I shall check the temperature of the bath water, splish-splash!
Where would you like me to wash first?
...No, as much as it pains me, I'll have to say "no" to this spot.

It's time for bed, so good night,
as I hum for you a lullaby.
Ah, sleep well, Young Master,
sleep peacefully like a dead body.
If you have a nightmare, please summon me immediately,
and I shall answer with "Yes, yes, my Lord."
When morning finally arrives,
I shall make some more black tea to help you wake up.

A butler's daily routine.

A demon's real state of affairs.