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posted by jessicamc26
A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The chicken runs to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the chicken and horse were playing in the meadow again and the chicken fell into the mud hole. The chicken yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my 'thingy' and pull yourself up." And the chicken did and pulled himself to safety. The moral of the story: If you are hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.
posted by dramaqueen00
eat it now!
eat it now!
How come you're always such a fussy young man?
Don't want no Captain Crunch, don't want no Raisin Bran
Well, don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan
So eat it, just eat it (prrr)

Don't wanna argue, I don't wanna debate
Don't want to hear about what kind of food you hate ooh
You won't get no dessert 'till you clean off your plate
So eat it, don't you tell me you're full


Just eat it, eat it , eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesn't matter , it's broiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it, ooh

Your table...
continue reading...
posted by KatiiCullen94
This is what i would say to my jacob, if i can even say he is mine.


How do i even start off, do i start off saying that i dont know how to start off,or do i pour my heart out,that first word, i dont know anymore..Because with you, nothing is the way it seems, or the way it was before. Everything changes even the way im supposed to write this, you've confused me.
OK,, i think is this part where i pour my heart out right?? if not. im going to sound.. odd. but who cares now? not you. you wont even read this my love.
ok here i go, keep me from falling.
I meet you on a saturday, on the first saturday...
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from:sponge bob
wirtten by:sponge bob
guitar by:spongeb
preformed by:sponge bob&patrick& squidward
featuring:Patrick
also featuring :squidward *sorta*
drums:patrick
singer:spongebob

lets gather around the campfire and sing the campfire song our c-a-mp-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g song. and if you think that we cant sing it faster then your wrong but itll help if you just sing along
Bom Bom Bom
*sing it fast!*
C-a-m-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g song,C-am-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g song and if you think that we cant sing it faster then you wrong but itll help if you just sing along.
*even faster*C-a-m-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g song,C-a-m-p-f-i-r-e-s-o-n-g song Patrick!
"SoNG!C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E..
"squdiward1good!"
Itll help!itll help!if you just sing along!OH YEAH!

THE END
"
posted by twilight0girl
link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can you forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the street physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your ass like rembrandt!
Ha! You Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when you see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who you are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what you did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who you are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...
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posted by simpleplan
1. When the teacher says to “take a seat”, you answer “take it where”.
2. When the teacher calls your name at roll call, you answer “Absent”.
3. When she calls roll, you answer “yo mama”.
4. When the teacher says something, you say “is that so?”
5. If you so happened to not turn in your homework say, your class pet ate it.
6. Tell your teacher you’ll turn in your homework, as soon as your parents finish doing it.
7. Tell your teacher you did not turn in your homework because you were watching TV.
8. Fold your homework into a cootie-catcher.
9. Fold your homework into a paper...
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posted by Crazy_NarutoKid
1.The Characters are awesome


2.It can make you laugh so hard


3.It can make you cry like a baby


4.The fight scenes are epic


5.Theres blood


6.They swear


7.The storyline is really good


8.Theres Ninjas'!!


9.They have Sasuke(cool)


10.The weapons they use are so coool


11.The villians are so evil.


12.It makes you wish you lived in the naruto world.


13.They have great opening and ending songs.


14.It makes you think about it all the time


15.It teaches you naruto history
I found this online :)

1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming “Andre, Andre, I’ve got the secret documents!!”

2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, “I’m SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking.” Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.

4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious...
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added by Jamie38459
If this doesn't creep you out, then I dunno what will...
video
granny
boobs
halloween
scare
random
creepy
stupid
funny
added by camosolidsnake
Source: armoredd.com
added by Cliff040479
Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/77371316@N00/72816738/
Some of you girls will remember that on Wednesday i told you that Miley's parents were getting a divorce.

According to the celeb news source HollywoodLife.com, Miley was so devastated by her parents Tish and Billy Ray Cyrus‘ divorce that she got back together with Liam Hemsworth.

“Miley knew about the divorce awhile ago and she’s been taking it really hard. Pretty much at the same time, she broke up with Liam, Hannah Montana was ending and then her parents’ marriage was falling apart,” Miley’s friend says.

“She got super stressed out and that’s really when she started acting out...
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DO you wanna know reasons why Alice Cullen is better then any werewolf out there ( espeshally Leah Clearwater)???? Well read on to see 10 reasons why.............



Oh ya if your a Leah Clearwater fan then you might not wanna read this but if you do and it affends you then leave a comment and i can tell you in person why your sooo stupid and ya i worned you so..................

TEN REASONS WHY ALICE IS BETTER THEN LEAH!!!

1. Alice is acually nice unlike Leah who made Bella cry for no reason at all ( Breaking Dawn)

2. Leah doesn't care about other people she only cares about herself well Alice does...
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
added by Alexyss_Cullen
Source: My Ipod & Some App
added by aitypw
posted by invadercalliope
CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIII
IIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
PPPPPEEEEE
EEEEEEEEEEE
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL!
HI EVERYONE!
TODAYS MY 2 EPISODE!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
ITS ME INVADER CALLIOPE YOUR HOST!
NOW ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE SPECAIL GUEST STAR ZIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
clapdy clap clap
Invader Callipe:HI ZIM
Zim:I'M NORMAL *walks away*
WELL BYE ZIIIIIIIIIIIM!
WELL GOODBYE EVERYONE THIS IS THE END OF EPISODE 2!
SEE YA LATER BYE BYE EVERYONE!
The End!
Miss Carey: Hello, Allex! Come in!
Allex: Hi! What's happening here?
Mady: It's drama club.
Miss Carey: Come and join us!
Allex: Ok. What are you doing?
Ed: We're putting on a play.
Allex: Really? Can i be in it? I like acting.
Nicki: He's a really good actor, Miss Carey.
Miss Carey: Excellent!
Allex: What's the play?
Mady: It's The Ugly Duckling.
Allex: Oh... That's for little children.
Mady: Yes, we're doing it for kindergarten.
Nicki: It's fun!
Ed: I'm the kind man.
Mady: I'm the kind man's doughter.
Alex: What about me?
Miss Carey: You, Alex, can be the ugly duckling.
posted by shutyourface
don't worry this article is not about sheep or bananas it is about a more serious matter.

this is a debate and i want everyone reading this
writing a comment about what you think is write or wrong
ok?

so anyway

here i go


what came first

the egg

or the chicken?

thats my debate and i want EVERYONE who's a fan
of random to write what they think is right


and become a fan of me and become a fan of my
article

and remember

what came first
the egg
or the chicken

i am only doing this because i have been
wondering that for ages
posted by CullenProperty
1.    Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys love flirts.
3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.
5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have you eaten already?" are the first usual questions a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.
6. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
7. When a guy really likes you,...
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