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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: Why are we always standing in front of the exact same house?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Don't ask me. Ask the director.
Master Sword: He's not even here.
Tom: Why not?
Master Sword: He got arrested for drunk driving, and attacking a police officer, thinking it was a zombie panda.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Strange.... very very strange. Today's crossover parody, Barbie: Life In The Russian Front....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house* HAPPY NEW YEAR ASSHOLES!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Let's get some fireworks! *Sets up a firework*
Master Sword: Let's shoot some guns into the air! *Grabs a Glock 18, and shoots twelve bullets* I love Austrian guns!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Sees firework go off in the sky*
Master Sword: That was great, but seriously people, it's just the beginning of a new year.
Tom: There's no need to get excited about it....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Hey everypony.
Audience: Hey!!
Tom: How are you doing?
Audience: Good.
Tom: Then go to hell!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Why would you tell them to do that? If they all went to hell, we'd have no audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Just a good start to get our audience laughing. Anyway, we got some bad news. It's about Warner Brothers.
Master Sword: Oh great.
Tom: They now have taken control of...
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I do think that you probably should avoid the following sites I am going to list. I will add more to the list when I find more sites I think you should probably avoid. So if anyone sends you links to the following sites, you have been warned that they could be tricking you. Some of these are obviously bad by the name of the url but some of them are very sneaky to trick you.

UNLESS YOU ARE A SICKO I ADVISE YOU NOT TO GO TO THE FOLLOWING SITES

meatspin.com
fingerslam.com
infoslash.com
wowomg.com
2girls1cup.com
2girls1finger.com
lemonparty.org
goatse.cz
cleangirls.org
salsasnack.com
goatsemarathon.com
biblecamp.info...
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I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.
You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
For a moment I thought I...
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1. Angel Eyes - call her this name and she'll either think you're lying or you'll get some action faster than a pit bull on a t-bone.

2. Baby Doll - is a class girlfriend name so call her this all you want even if she is the kind who will out chug you in beer and pull a monster truck over your face on occasion.

3. Bubble Butt - is one of those names you never, and I mean never call your girlfriend since this will end it all, and there will be no chance in getting back with her even for a drunken 2 am booty call.

4. Cuddle Bug - is one that most girlfriends will respond well to and will be an invitation...
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Good truth or dare Questions

Truth or dare is fun, only when all the people involved in the game are comfortable with each other. Here are some questions, which can be termed as good truth or dare questions, which will help you to break the ice and ease the environment of a strained gathering.

Which was the most embarrassing moment of your life?

Describe the strangest dream you have ever had in your life?

What is the one quality or feature you would like to change about yourself?

Do you have a crush on any of your friend's boyfriend or boyfriend's friend?

Do you think your boyfriend is marriage material?...
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TRUTH

Who do you have a crush on?

If you had to date anyone here right now, who would it be?

Name one celebrity you would want to make out with

Name five people you hate and why you hate them

Name all the people you've had a crush on before

Have you ever embarrassed yourself in front of everyone in school? If you did, what did you do?

What embarrassing thing has a parent done to you?

Have you ever cheated on your girlfriend/boyfriend?

Have you had your first kiss, if you have, were was it and who was it with?

Have you ever seen a parent naked?

Have you ever seen animals reproducing?

Have you stalked anyone,...
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found this stuff and i wanted to share with you guys (girls) so enjoy !! =)





1.Stare at someone and if/when they stare back at you, yell, “Staring is extremely impolite!”

2.Bring a Glad product to school and whenever someone gets mad at you, say, “Don’t get mad! Get Glad!” Then hold up the Glad product.

3.Keep talking as if you’re talking to the person next to you, and when they answer, scream, “I wasn’t talking to you! Now, Bob, where were we?”

4.When the teacher calls roll, after each name scream "THAT'S MEEEEE!!! Oh, no, sorry."

5.Sing your questions to the class.

6.Sit in...
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posted by smileypop9
1.When you walk into the room, run up to the teacher and stare her in the eyes. nothing more. just keep a straight face and stare. they get quite scared.

2.Before your science class starts, put a cooler that has "Human Head" written on top, on the front table. On the board write: "Class, we will be disecting a human head tommorrow, the sign up list is on my desk for the part you would like to dissect" Actually put a sign up list on her desk.

3.bring a cactus to school. Raise your hand. When called upon say the cactus has a question. look at the cactus and wait for it to say something. when it...
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1. Angus is for a beefy yet cute boyfriend, or to bolster up the woefully sagging self-esteem of a weak, pasty face limb noodle who does your homework for you.

2. Babe - is a classic cute boyfriend nickname that will only get you in a slight amount of trouble in front of his friends. ( i call mine this)

3. Baby Boo Boo - is for a boyfriend that you'd like to castrate slowly by giving him effeminate names.

4. Bunny-kins - means you're cousins and will be humping like bunnies at the next family wedding.

5. Bunny Wabbit - you may as well stroke his belly with a coonskin cap and feed him grapes when...
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1)"Why, do you find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I love the second grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and you actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...
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DEMENTED POEMS

Roses are crap
Violets are shit
Sit on my face
And wiggle a bit

Roses are stupid
Violets are silly
Grease up your flaps
Cuz here comes my willy

Roses are awful
Violets are the pits
Lift up your shirt
And show me your tits

Roses make me laugh
Violets make me titter
You're a dirty bitch
And you love it up the shitter

Roses are straight
Violets are twisted
Bend over love
You're about to get fisted

Roses are crap
Violets are wanky
Oooh I've just cum
Pass me a hanky

Roses are red
It's elementary
Let's ring your best friend
And try double entry

Roses are shit
Violets are crap
Show me your clit
And I'll cum in your lap

Roses are red
Skidmarks are brown
Give me a blow job
And swallow it down

Roses are groovy
Violets are funky
I'm thinking of you
And spanking my monkey
link

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{。^◕‿◕^。} (◕^^◕) ✖✗✘♒♬✄ ✂✆✉✦✧♱ ♰♂♀☿❤❥ ❦❧ ™®©♡♦ ♢♔♕♚♛★ ☆✮ ✯☄☾☽ ☼☀☁☂☃☻ ☺☹ ☮۞۩ εїз☎☏¢ ☚☛☜☝☞☟✍
✌☢☣☠☮☯ ♠♤♣♧♥ ♨๑❀✿ ψ☪☭♪ ♩♫℘ℑ ℜℵ♏ηα ʊϟღツ回...
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I Found that on the internet

1. When you were young, were you involved in any kind of political protests such as for the Civil Rights movement or against Vietnam? Why or why not?

2. What tells you when a child is responsible enough to trust a lot?

3. What was your first car? What was your favorite car when you were young?

4. How often do you go over the speed limit?

5. Were you considered popular in middle school or high school? Why or why not?

6. Did you have big fights with your mom when you were growing up? If so, what were they usually about?

7. Did you have big fights with your dad when you were...
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1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...
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posted by chowjoyi
41 ways to annoy your parents



1. Follow them everywhere.

2. When they say your name, moo loudly like a cow.

3. If you have a dog, follow the dog around on all-fours and say "Bark." over and over again really loudly.

4. Talk to a pen constantly.

5. When your friends come over, pretend to be talking in code and have your friend say 'Your-a pa smells-a like a woman-a." If they crack the code, play stupid.

6. Have a dozen of imaginary friends that you ask their opinion of everything.

7. After you have your bath, wrap a bath towel around you and then walk outside of the bathroom. When your parents ask...
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I never thought I would be doing a list like this because when I do lists based on looks it's on women. As a straight guy, it's easier for me to rank women than men. However, when I put my mind to something I try my best to come through. I had already done this list with women and I remember being asked if I would ever do it with men, so here it is. Keep in mind this is all just my personal opinion as a straight guy and it wasn't easy to figure out AT ALL! Please comment but be polite. Also, always comment because I worked HARD on this and during a time I had just had laser eye surgery and...
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50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time you turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him or her that you’ve lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he or she has anything...
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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my list of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let you know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything or eating anything you might spit it or something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the broom late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's favorite...
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