Ok, this is my first attempt at writing a story, if that's what I should call it, I'm not sure. I'm not an experienced writer, and English isn't my mother tongue, so it's not flawless. Please bear with me a little. But please feel free to give me feedback on this, positive or negative, either way. :)
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There was a time, when she felt like she could do anything. A time when the world didn't seem as intimidating. When all her challenges and struggles was small, and forgotten by the blink of an eye. She doesn't seem to remember a single time when she was younger, when she found herself nervous, shy or held back by anything.
But now that she's older, it seems like she's crumbling under the weight of it all. Suddenly she's not forgetting at all. She's remembering and holding on to memories of failures or other unpleasant things, as if that would solve anything. Sadly, but like expected, it hasn't helped her much yet. She's the shy, quiet girl, spending her time over-analyzing everything.
She goes around for days, thinking of whatever activity coming up that she's anxious about. Maybe a school presentation, or maybe something else, involving situations she's not too comfortable with. She sits in class, watching the teacher as he asks the class a question. A short, easy question. Yet, she sits perfectly still, both hands down, hoping that the teacher somehow will miss her presence. Even though she knows the answer. I can see how she tries to take a look around the classroom without moving too much. She's wishing for someone, anyone, to raise their hand. It's so obvious on her face, she wishes to be anywhere but here. Much like seeing her in P.E., how she always look like she wishes to sink into a hole in the floor. She sighs in relief as the boy on the front row, Alex, raises his hand, moving the teachers attention towards the other side of the classroom.
Her life is full of those small, completely manageable situations, that she can't seem to deal with in a satisfying manner. Even though the big deal about those situations are something relatively easy, small or quickly finished, she can't seem to let it go. How she became so shy and at times anxious, is beyond me. I can't come up with anything that suggested her becoming this girl crumbled by shyness. To be honest, she has no reason to be crumbled either. She is smart, and I'm guessing she's got the answers to all the questions being asked, if she only dared to answer them. She is quite pretty too. Even though she looks average at first sight, she's not. Besides the brain and looks, she's also a very nice and warm person. To me, she seems like the kind of person who could do great things if she only let go of the steering wheel once in a while. And if she would open up a little to the people around her, they would see that too.
I wish I could help her somehow, make that discomfort so evidently in her face, disapear. I guess I could say somehting like "Fake it 'til you make it" or "Be seen.Get out there!", but I know she has heard it all before. But not even knowing all the tips and tricks has made a difference yet. I just hope that someday it will.
I wish she remembered that time in elementary school, when she didn't want to go to school. And the time she ran home from the bus stop, crying, because she had English at school that day? Why can't she remember that, and how she got her act together? How come she doesn't remember the triumph she must have felt when she defeated her fears and shyness, and went to school after all? Why has she forgotten how she ended up being one of the best students in her English class the following years? Why can't she just remember how all her troubles, who at that time, seemed bigger than life itself, ended up being small?
She has done it once. I'm confident in the fact that someday, she will do it again...
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There was a time, when she felt like she could do anything. A time when the world didn't seem as intimidating. When all her challenges and struggles was small, and forgotten by the blink of an eye. She doesn't seem to remember a single time when she was younger, when she found herself nervous, shy or held back by anything.
But now that she's older, it seems like she's crumbling under the weight of it all. Suddenly she's not forgetting at all. She's remembering and holding on to memories of failures or other unpleasant things, as if that would solve anything. Sadly, but like expected, it hasn't helped her much yet. She's the shy, quiet girl, spending her time over-analyzing everything.
She goes around for days, thinking of whatever activity coming up that she's anxious about. Maybe a school presentation, or maybe something else, involving situations she's not too comfortable with. She sits in class, watching the teacher as he asks the class a question. A short, easy question. Yet, she sits perfectly still, both hands down, hoping that the teacher somehow will miss her presence. Even though she knows the answer. I can see how she tries to take a look around the classroom without moving too much. She's wishing for someone, anyone, to raise their hand. It's so obvious on her face, she wishes to be anywhere but here. Much like seeing her in P.E., how she always look like she wishes to sink into a hole in the floor. She sighs in relief as the boy on the front row, Alex, raises his hand, moving the teachers attention towards the other side of the classroom.
Her life is full of those small, completely manageable situations, that she can't seem to deal with in a satisfying manner. Even though the big deal about those situations are something relatively easy, small or quickly finished, she can't seem to let it go. How she became so shy and at times anxious, is beyond me. I can't come up with anything that suggested her becoming this girl crumbled by shyness. To be honest, she has no reason to be crumbled either. She is smart, and I'm guessing she's got the answers to all the questions being asked, if she only dared to answer them. She is quite pretty too. Even though she looks average at first sight, she's not. Besides the brain and looks, she's also a very nice and warm person. To me, she seems like the kind of person who could do great things if she only let go of the steering wheel once in a while. And if she would open up a little to the people around her, they would see that too.
I wish I could help her somehow, make that discomfort so evidently in her face, disapear. I guess I could say somehting like "Fake it 'til you make it" or "Be seen.Get out there!", but I know she has heard it all before. But not even knowing all the tips and tricks has made a difference yet. I just hope that someday it will.
I wish she remembered that time in elementary school, when she didn't want to go to school. And the time she ran home from the bus stop, crying, because she had English at school that day? Why can't she remember that, and how she got her act together? How come she doesn't remember the triumph she must have felt when she defeated her fears and shyness, and went to school after all? Why has she forgotten how she ended up being one of the best students in her English class the following years? Why can't she just remember how all her troubles, who at that time, seemed bigger than life itself, ended up being small?
She has done it once. I'm confident in the fact that someday, she will do it again...
i would end up here with you
i was a restless wanderer on a distant path
you were a lonely dreamer with a broken laugh
i would go anywhere the road would lead
my hopes and dreams is all that i would need
i don't need a house or fancy cars
i would rather sleep underneath the stars
you did'nt have much to call your own
but what a lovely smile on your face shown
you said your chance at love had past you by
i told i'm here so dont you cry
our lives were like the pieces of a broken heart
now that we're together what a life could start
there was magic in the air that night
everything was moving at the speed of light
you were like my juliet and i your romeo
you love me i love you thats all i need to know
no longer will you dream of love thats true
no longer will i wander my search has led to you
I wrote this about my (now ex) boyfriend, but still felt something about the poem, if not him. I'd love some criticism on it (hopefully constructive) :).
Treacle dripping from our scars
Pooling on a jagged floor
You are gone, still I know
From clustered trees and homemade vows
That we are one. And as you lead
Your life of promise, graft and need
Know that we are one the same
Intertwined are heart at name.
You may notice that only the second verse rhymes, this is an attempt to show the idea of a one-sided relationship in its form in it's one-sided rhyme scheme. This is probably quite stupid- let me know.
Treacle dripping from our scars
Pooling on a jagged floor
You are gone, still I know
From clustered trees and homemade vows
That we are one. And as you lead
Your life of promise, graft and need
Know that we are one the same
Intertwined are heart at name.
You may notice that only the second verse rhymes, this is an attempt to show the idea of a one-sided relationship in its form in it's one-sided rhyme scheme. This is probably quite stupid- let me know.