Canada24's club.. Article: Master sword and Saten twist adventures: BEST OF's... Part 1 (sword and Saten themselves)

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Master sword and Saten twist adventures: BEST OF's... Part 1 (sword and Saten themselves)

posted by Canada24

MASTER SWORD:

Sword: (writing fanfic of Derpy, but then Saten comes in and he switches it too porn, of all things)..

Saten: How do I know you won't shoot me in the eye
Sword: (literary aiming a sniper gun at Saten's eye) No, no, I won't shoot you in the eye..

Sword: Let's look at the bright sides... Saten not being drunk, bright sides.

Sword: GODDAMN IT, CHIMNEY, SHUT THAT FUCKING REPEATING BROKEN RECORD YOU CALL A MOUTH!

Sword: Whats with the knife!? Please tell me that's going to be used for non-stabbing me purposes!

Sword: Oh, and I should apologize,. I guess when I saw Derpy getting hurt I just wanted to RIP HIS FUCKING HEART OUT!!! And I did. Its right..... (Sees heart and points) over there.

Sword: And then I told him, "That's what she said", and then I broke his arm.

Sword: Derpy is such a perfect girlfriend!
Saten: I'm glad... But no trying anything.
Sword: Dose sex count?...... We had sex.
Saten: .......... (angrily punches him in the face).
Sword: Still worth it!

Sword: Oh, hey you two. How is your day going... And why are your eyes bloodshot... and why are you giggling... and why do you smell like weed?

Sword: (to babysitter) You harm Dinky your be dead and buried before the amber alert goes out!
Derpy: He's not kidding.. I saw him do it before.

Derpy: I still wonder what Sword would of been like, as an gangster.
(vision of Sword as a gang leader) Come on boys! Let's rob a bank. Give the money to the poor. Then rob the poor. And SHOOT THE MONEY! (they all cheer).

Pita: Hey Sword. Meet my X boyfriend.
Sword: You dated Pita?
Lucas: Yep.
Sword: (examines Pita then turns back to Lucas) Why would you 'stop'?

Sword: I can't believe this. I slept with Derpy AND Octavia, at the same time.
Derpy: Great, but no telling Saten.
Sword: Coarse not.
(soon after)
Sword: (at bar) Saten I had a threeway with Derpy and Octavia!
Saten: Who the fuck starts a conversation like that!? I JUST sat down!

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SATEN TWIST:

Saten: Relax, I only smoke when I drink now.
Derpy: But you "always" drink!
Saten: .......... I'm working on that.

AJ: AJ: Why'd you have a crush on me. I mean, there are so much other ponies that you could have chosen.... Why me?
Saten: Well. I always loved your voice.. And you have the most beauitful eyes I've ever seen, ever..

AJ: (after giving Saten a big kiss on the lips) Ah need ta tell you something.
Saten: *gasps* Oh god. Your breaking up with me.
AJ: What?
Saten: W Why would you kiss me, and then break up with me.. That is so crue-
AJ: *puts her hooves on him softly* Honey. Relax. Ah'm not breaking up with ya,
Saten: (nervously) Oh.. Right, I I knew that.. (takes a large sip from the beer)..

Saten: (No! No! Don't give him the sadifaction of answering!) Not sure (NO! YOU FUCKIN IDIOT! One of these days I'm gonna jump us off a cliff) shut up brain, or I'll stab you with a toothpick.

AJ: I love Saten to death.. But his jealously is annoying.. You should of seen him at dinner.
(ealier).
Waiter: Here is your napkin (Hands her napkin)
Satan: Woah woah woah... Did you just give my wife an extra napkin?
Waiter: Is there something wrong with it
Satan: (angrily) Yeah, there is. I think you may be trying to flirt with her!
AJ: Satan, it's just a napkin. Calm down
Satan: Fine
Waiter: Now, here are your breadsticks
Satan: (See's one extra breadstick) Okay, that's it! (Beats the waiter up).

Bartender: Here's your beer
Saten: I wanted WINE!! (Throws it at him) GET IT RIGHT!!

Saten: Least your still better than her last boyfriend.
(Flashback)
Derpy: (crying) Saten! Jerry cheated on me with another woman., said I wasn't hot anymore, do to my eye injury..
Saten: I see.. Where dose he live?
Derpy: Next door, why?
Saten: (loading double barrel) Just gonna talk him,
Derpy: Is that a gu-
Saten: Wait here.. (Leaves with the gun)
(Gun shot sound, before he soon returns)
Derpy: What was tha-
Saten: Nothing.. But I think we need to get outta town for a while.

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THE END.

Part 2 will be BEST OF DITTO and maybe of MADDY

Dreamtime likes this

Windwakerguy430 That was great XD

Top ten most likeable video game protagonists

posted by Canada24

#1: COLE PHELPS:
Some people would disagree.. I find Cole Phelps one of the most likeable video game characters.. He doesn't give a shit about the fame, or the money.. Only thing considered selfish, is he's trying to feel better about himself.. And I hated him for cheating on his wife the first time.. But I get it now.. In most causes of PTSD, the person has trouble to their wife, who don't understood what it was like out there.. Elsa was troubled. She better understood.. All it does is make you hate Roy that much more. Marie did not "need" to know about what was likely a one time thing..

#2:...

Top six villains we both hate AND love

posted by Canada24

#1: ANNIE WILKES:
We totally get that crazy fandom that can drive you to extremes. But you know, waiting on line all night to get into a Comic-Con panel is one thing. Another thing to kidnap your favorite author, breaking his legs with a sledge hammer (in the book she friggin chops off his finger), and murdering a cop. But hey, she has a certain entertainment value.

#2: THE JOKER:
The Clown Prince of Crime is beloved by fans for how deliciously devious he can be. Every version of the character (and there are many) finds a unique way to get under our skin by utterly devastating Batman, and one...

Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) trivia (2)

posted by DisneyPrince88

1.To provoke a response from the actors in the scene in "Freddy's Cave", the photographs they found were Polaroids of little girls mixed with real Polaroids taken from medical surgeries.

2.It is the 8th highest grossing slasher film of all time.

3.Their main source of inspiration was The Dark Knight (2008).

4.Jackie Earle Haley accidentally cut Kyle Gallner's chest with the Freddy glove while filming a scene. Haley didn't realize what he had done until the scene was finished.

5.They wanted Jackie Earle Haley to play Freddy because they loved his Watchmen screen test.

6.At 5'6", Jackie Earle Haley...

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CANADA24 reviews I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE

posted by Canada24

According to Cinema Snob this movie use to be called

"Rape and revenge"

Really gives away the ending, doesn't it?

This movie is banned in my own country.
And for good reason.

Any SANE person would be left with this reaction.

You know.. The same one from Cannibal Halocoast.. Or the Twilight movies.

The film is noted for its controversial depiction of graphic violence, nudity, obscene language, and lengthy depictions of gang rape which take up 30 minutes of the film's runtime.

Yeah.. Who wants to spent 30 minutes watching some poor woman getting assaulted by hillbillies simply cause she has tits...

I found a GOOD creepy pasta: simply titled 1978

posted by Canada24

In my opinion, it's more depressing than scary

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I like to think I live a nice life. I own a cozy, 3 bedroom home in a quiet neighborhood in the suburbs. I have a wife I care about deeply and a 9 year old son who is my world. I enjoy my job as an accountant, and I'm well recognized in the community. I can confidently say I greatly enjoy living and appreciate all that I have earned. I only wish my entire life had been like this.

You see, throughout my teens and early adulthood, I suffered from severe anxiety issues stemming from an...

TOP TEN WORST THINGS THE JOKER HAS DONE:

posted by Canada24

This was deleted for some reason.. So redoing it..

#1: HARMING/KILLING CHILDREN:
As bad as Trevor Phillips can get.
Joker is still worse.
Joker has no boundaries, he grabbed Robin hostage when he was still a little kid in the show, tortured him for weeks on straight, and made the poor boy go insane.
Joker would burn down a orphanage full of sick childrun because he's "bored".
He does something even worse.
The Joker gives unsuspecting children poisoned cotton candy, and the children instantly died, but does the Joker feel remorse?
No he just laughs maniacally..

#2: KILLING PEOPLE WITH SHARDS OF GLASS:...

TOP TEN SCARIEST CREEPYPASTAS OF MY OPINION

posted by Canada24

#1: GIVE IT EVERYTHING:
It's kinda hard to summarize this story, but basically it's a set of emails, where a man gets a mysterious dog on his front yard, holding a sign saying "give it everything", and gave it too his son. But the kid begins acting weird after that. And the dog watches him sleep, not in a cute way, but disturbing way.
In each email, the writer becomes more and more paranoid.
I won't spoil much, so your have to read the story.
But it's scarier than you think.. Especially when THATCREEPYREADING reads it to you..

#2: NO HOMOPHONES:
The narrator is fucking NUTS. As a kid, he got...

Favorite video game weapons.. (feating Windwakerguy430, and fanfiction's Hardrocker21 and RedRose85)

posted by Canada24

#1: MAKE PAYNE 3 - UZI (or Micro SMG if you prefer):
I never played the others. I play Max Payne 3 as it's OWN game.. The 3rd games gives enough to understand the character.. His family is dead, he's rarely serious, he has a serious temper issue, but he's a decent human being, even though he believes he's NOT.
Anyway. Max seems to prefer hand weapons.
In all cutscenes, if your using a shotgun or machine gun, he will hold it in his other hand while holding a handgun as the actual weapon, and after each cut scene you always have to switch back to it. Something that confused the first time, I did...

Top ten Nostalgia Critic quotes PART 3

posted by Canada24

#1:
Elizabeth: I have absolutely no intention of marrying Everard. I'm sorry to upset your plans, but...
Elizabeth's Father: Plans did you say? My one and only plan, dear girl, is to see you as happy as possible, and I would never dream of forcing you to do something you don't want to.
Critic:(as Elizabeth's father) Unless it was the beginning of the movie in which case I said you had no choice.
Critic: (as a scene of Elizabeth and her father hugging plays) Seriously, what did she do different? She made the same argument she did before. In fact, it's actually less angry. Are you honestly telling...

1

I think I like Nostalgia Critic a bit more than AVGN

posted by Canada24

Yes..
James Rolfe is the one who's more popular, and probably was on youtube FIRST. Doug Walker probably came second.

And yes..
They have more or less the SAME humour. They're both portrayed as Anti-Heroes.
NERD is portrayed as an foul mouthed, abusive, mentally insane, alcoholic.
And CRETIC is portrayed as equally short tempered, abusive, insane, and foul mouthed.

But somehow, I find Nostalgia Critic a bit funnier than Angry Video Game Nerd.

I guess it's Doug Walker's voice.
He has that high pitched voice, that make the angry rants that much funnier.

But I don't NOT like Nerd.
He's still funny.. Hell, he's hilarious.
Cretic is just a bit MORE hilarious..

1

Most UNDERRATED Metallica album

posted by Canada24

As all TRUE Metallica fans know.
ST ANGER is often the "worst" album.

But why?

I gave it a listen.
And I tell you what.
There is NOTHING bad about an album opening up with FRANTIC.

Haters say, it's the lack of solos that makes this album so bad.
But the solos often got SO long, I don't consider this really a BAD thing. More for the actual SONGS.

And it's also the loud snare drums that's hated on.
But I fuckin LOVE the snare drums Lars Ulrich really shows off how talented he is. As the drums are extremely loud, but not in a bad way. The POINT of Metallica, is to be LOUD.

I'm not sure how much enjoyment I'll get out of them LIVE, xD

1

WHY Cupakes would never happen

posted by Canada24

#1:
Pinkie would never hurt her friends, Pinkamena murders Rainbow Dash with joy.

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#2:
Pinkie makes cupcakes normally, Pinkamena uses dead bodies.

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#3:
Pinkie is a bit slow witted, Pinkamena would often demonstrate unnaturally high intelligence in later crossovers.

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#4:
Pinkie is a cute and harmless little pony. Pinkamena is an mentally ill serial killer.

@@@@@@@

#5:
Pinkie cracks light hearted jokes, Pinkamena has a very twisted (Freddy Krueger like) humor.

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Top ten most EVIL villains: PART 2:

posted by Canada24

#1: DOCTOR HARLAN FONTAINE (La Noire):
Fontaine is one of the most cold and ruthless characters in the game, obsessed with power and manipulation. He constantly utilizes people to further his ends, as seen by his keeping Elsa Lichtmann addicted to drugs in order to investigate the breakdown of an addict and using Lou Buchwalter for the Fund, causing his death. He is also a master at manipulating people, demonstrated by how he convinced Courtney Sheldon to give him the stolen army surplus morphine in blatant abuse of his trust. Furthermore, he manipulated Ira Hogeboom to assist in the Fund's...

Top 8 Greatest LA NOIRE moments

posted by Canada24

#1: LEROY SNAPS:
Lorna's lack of grief, her relationship with Leroy, as well as Lester's life insurance raised Phelps' suspicions. Phelps and Bekowsky eventually discover that Lester was murdered by a steak knife, and was dead before the car hit him. If the player had already found the knife, when first investigating the crime scene. Cole will conclude this is the same one (witch is proven correct).
Phelps and Bekowsky will confront Lorna at her home. Revealing how cowardly she actually is, Lorna attempted to pin all the blame onto Leroy.
Unfortunately Leroy overheard and, armed with a handgun,...

2

Top 5 video game characters who are neither good OR bad:

posted by Canada24

#1: TREVOR PHILLIPS (GTA 5):
Trevor shows to be extremely protective of those he cares for. He threatens ANYONE who disrespects them. And his anger of Brad's death show's he truly did care about the man.
But Trevor is ALSO impetuous, vengeful, psychotic, unhinged, unpredictable, untamed, infamous, sociopathic and prone to violent outbursts and destructive rampages - in the second trailer he smashed an unknown person's head into a bar counter and was then seen setting a house on fire and walking out of the area without a care in sight. He does everything in an awful and relentless manner, (much...

1

Got bored so made top eight quotes from SPOOF MAJOR:

posted by Canada24

#1:
The Majr: Gentlemen… we… are Nazis!
Nazis: Sieg heil! Sieg heil!
The Major: And we… Will have war!
Nazis: Sieg heil! Sieg heil!
The Major: And we… AND WE… *sneeze*
Nazis: Gesundheit! Gesundheit!

#2:
Doctor: But Major, now that they know of our plans...
Major: Ah, Herr Doctor, but that is the plan~! Now that they know our plan, they will plan around our plan, and so we shall in turn plan around the plan that they are planning around our plan!!
Doctor: ...Your brilliance knows no bounds!
Major: And regardless... We have one advantage that they sorely lack... ZEPPELINS!

#3:
The Major: Ah, if...

1

Top 5 most Disturbing songs:

posted by Canada24

#1: EMINEM - KIM:
There's a certain part of Eminem that most would call me the same as.
Marshal is famish for having a very dark humour, much like myself.
But in this one, he manages to take it a step to far, as he's barely even singing, really just screaming.
Eminem, thanks his many talents, makes us believe he might of actually done this (witch he doesn't, Kim is his X wife, an it was just "wishful thinking"). Eminem is never the killer he is in his songs, it's just his humour. He's probably pretty nice, who really know..

link

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Not MLP themed, but what's your thoughts on this scary story I found?

posted by Canada24

It started with my 3 year old son screaming in his room in the middle of the night. When I came in to check on him he was in hysterics. Tears ran down his little cheeks as he cried about how the Boogeyman had frightened him. I let him sleep with my wife and I for the night, thinking it was just a bad dream.

The next evening he didn’t even want to be in his room, but I convinced him that the Boogey Man was just a figment of his imagination. I was awoken once more by his screams. I rushed to his room, to find him in tears again.

On the third night I set up a camcorder in his room, in order...

Top 6 funny radio moments from GTA 4 and 5

posted by Canada24

#1:
MAN: Young man? You trapped in the Seventies? Nobody says "young man".
What else you gonna say? "Fresh"?
LAZLOW: Look--whatever, homeboy. Listen. Tell me what the kids are into. I gotta connect with the kids. Not my private parts, you know, but--that's for online--but, what are you out doing?
MAN: Yo, I'm delivering weed.
LAZLOW: But, you--you're only like thirteen.
MAN: Exactly. I won't go to prison.

#2:
GIRL: Yeah, um, oh, my God, am I on the radio!?
LAZLOW: Do you not realize that? This is a microphone, stupid!

#3:
Alan McClean: Speaking gives an atmosphere of fear!.. Waterboarding gives an atmosphere...

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Crazy Times 2 Part 6

posted by Canada24

"HOLLY FUCK! IT's FUCKIN BURNING!.. The whole place!... I've got to go in! I've got to get something!" Roman cried, seeing Dimitri and Burgarini have literary burnt down Roman's apartment, and Roman tried running into it, but Niko held him back.

"Leave it, cousin! This place is gone" Niko replied.

"THEY FUCKIN BURNT IT NIKO!... Do you know how long it took me to get a place of my own!? You got off the boat and I was here for you... I had NOTHING!.. nobody!.. I worked my way up from the fucking dirt!"

They reach Roman's taxi business only to see it has ALSO been burnt down, further angering Roman....