#1:
Steve Jobs (Ian): So buy the iPhone 5... OR I'LL #$%^ YOUR #$%@ AND @#$%$ YOUR @#$%!.. (smiles)
#2:
Ian: (evilly) Here you go Mom! (giggles evilly)
[Ian's Mom eats the donut and starts choking]
Ian: Die mom! (laughs)
Ian's Mom: (coughs) Just a sprinkle.
Ian: (visibly upset) But you're supposed to DIE!
[Ian starts crying]
Ian's Mom: Oh, honey, honey, you can try to kill me again later.
#3:
Anthony: So I woke up super-glued to the toilet seat. And the toilet was filled with poop. I mean FILLED, like 10 people just decided not to flush. I started gagging so I flushed the toilet... and then it started overflowing with me still glued to the seat. So there I was, glued to the toilet and being hit with wave after wave of other people's poop.
#4:
Ian: (smirks) Dude, you're totally gonna lose this one! Burritos are made out of, OK - one: cement, and two: Donald Trump's old skin!
Anthony: Yeah, but I tried both of these things, and they TASTE JUST FINE!!
#5:
Anthony: Let's do.. the skissors!
Ian: What?
Anthony: (points at Scissors) These skissors!
Ian: "Oooh, you mean the skis-órs? YEAH! LET’S DO IT!!
#6:
Anthony: Let's go, burrito! Come back to me!
[Anthony throws the burrito, which comes back, soaring straight over his head and keeps going]
Burrito: (voiced by Ian) SEE YOU LATER, F*GGET!!
#7:
Anthony: Anyway, what about the abilty to hear your dog's thoughts?
(Anthony is sitting on a couch, eating a hot dog. A dog stares at him)
Dog: Hey, give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! Hey give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! Hey, give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! JUST GIVE ME THE GODDAMN HOTDOG!!
#8:
Anthony: How about the ability to turn into water?
(Ian takes a glass of water and drinks it)
Anthony: NOOOOOO!
(Camera pans to Anthony)
Anthony: That's my water!
#9:
Anthony: Yeah, but what about the ability to detect when your friend's feeling really akward, 'cause you've been sitting on his lap this entire time.
Ian: (was sitting on the lap the entire time) Why would you ever need that power?
#10:
Anthony: (enthusiastically) Dig me a hole to China, burrito! [starts digging] I wanna see some Chinese people!
[After a short while, Anthony stops digging in confusion, and then unearths a blue vase. The Merchant from Resident Evil 4 appears]
The Merchant: Greetings, stranger! What are you selling?
Anthony: This is...this is a vase!
The Merchant: Ahh! I'll buy it at a high price! [Gives Anthony money in exchange for the vase]
Anthony: (excited) Oh! Eleven bucks?! WOO! YEAH!
#11:
Reporter: (about Smosh) We're reporting live on how an emo-hair loser and bowl-hair reject managed to get so many views on their stupid videos right in this house. (gets attacked by zombies)
Anthony: (not realizing it's them) Man, I wanted to make fun of those stupid-haired losers!
#12:
Ian: I'll bet your churro can't be a pink frosted sprinkled donut!
Anthony: Oh, yes it CAN!
Ian: Oh, Yeah!? No it can't because your churro isn't pink, it isn't frosted, it isn't sprinkled , and it's definitely not PINK!
Anthony: Well maybe if I ca-
Ian: Well yeah?! yeah?! so you know what? F!#K YOU!!
#13:
Narrator: It's been 13 hours, how do you feel now?
Jim: Must keep working, must never stop working, must always work, I love to work!
Boss: Jim, go home, everybody already left.
(Jim turns to his boss and screen turns red)
Jim (demonically possessed voice): NOT RIGHT NOW CHIEF, I AM IN THE FRICKING ZONE!!
(Jim turns back to his computer and keeps typing)
Jim: (normal voice) I love work I am going I will keep on typing If I stop typing I will die *laughs maniacally*
#14:
Narrator: 15 hour energy, because taking care of yourself with a proper diet and sleep is f**king stupid!
#15:
Dickle: And if you don't believe the Potter Pill will work for you, just listen to these satisfied customers.
(the customers are seen dead)
#16:
Dickle: It's even FDA approved.
Dr. Peacock: (has a gun over his head) This product is FDA approved.
#17:
Ian: What the hell does GPS stand for!?
Anthony: I don't know, it's just a cool combination of letters that don't mean anything, like USA.
#18:
Anthony: Let's take a stab at your mom with my dic- (shows book) -tionary!
#19:
Ian: Why did you tell your grandpa I'm gay?
Anthony: Cause he was old and it made him happy!
#20:
Ian: What was that noise!?
Anthony: I don't know.. You should go check it out by himself, where nobody can hear you, and without bringing any form of weapon, just take this (gives him flashlight).
Steve Jobs (Ian): So buy the iPhone 5... OR I'LL #$%^ YOUR #$%@ AND @#$%$ YOUR @#$%!.. (smiles)
#2:
Ian: (evilly) Here you go Mom! (giggles evilly)
[Ian's Mom eats the donut and starts choking]
Ian: Die mom! (laughs)
Ian's Mom: (coughs) Just a sprinkle.
Ian: (visibly upset) But you're supposed to DIE!
[Ian starts crying]
Ian's Mom: Oh, honey, honey, you can try to kill me again later.
#3:
Anthony: So I woke up super-glued to the toilet seat. And the toilet was filled with poop. I mean FILLED, like 10 people just decided not to flush. I started gagging so I flushed the toilet... and then it started overflowing with me still glued to the seat. So there I was, glued to the toilet and being hit with wave after wave of other people's poop.
#4:
Ian: (smirks) Dude, you're totally gonna lose this one! Burritos are made out of, OK - one: cement, and two: Donald Trump's old skin!
Anthony: Yeah, but I tried both of these things, and they TASTE JUST FINE!!
#5:
Anthony: Let's do.. the skissors!
Ian: What?
Anthony: (points at Scissors) These skissors!
Ian: "Oooh, you mean the skis-órs? YEAH! LET’S DO IT!!
#6:
Anthony: Let's go, burrito! Come back to me!
[Anthony throws the burrito, which comes back, soaring straight over his head and keeps going]
Burrito: (voiced by Ian) SEE YOU LATER, F*GGET!!
#7:
Anthony: Anyway, what about the abilty to hear your dog's thoughts?
(Anthony is sitting on a couch, eating a hot dog. A dog stares at him)
Dog: Hey, give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! Hey give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! Hey, give me the hot dog! Give me the hot dog! JUST GIVE ME THE GODDAMN HOTDOG!!
#8:
Anthony: How about the ability to turn into water?
(Ian takes a glass of water and drinks it)
Anthony: NOOOOOO!
(Camera pans to Anthony)
Anthony: That's my water!
#9:
Anthony: Yeah, but what about the ability to detect when your friend's feeling really akward, 'cause you've been sitting on his lap this entire time.
Ian: (was sitting on the lap the entire time) Why would you ever need that power?
#10:
Anthony: (enthusiastically) Dig me a hole to China, burrito! [starts digging] I wanna see some Chinese people!
[After a short while, Anthony stops digging in confusion, and then unearths a blue vase. The Merchant from Resident Evil 4 appears]
The Merchant: Greetings, stranger! What are you selling?
Anthony: This is...this is a vase!
The Merchant: Ahh! I'll buy it at a high price! [Gives Anthony money in exchange for the vase]
Anthony: (excited) Oh! Eleven bucks?! WOO! YEAH!
#11:
Reporter: (about Smosh) We're reporting live on how an emo-hair loser and bowl-hair reject managed to get so many views on their stupid videos right in this house. (gets attacked by zombies)
Anthony: (not realizing it's them) Man, I wanted to make fun of those stupid-haired losers!
#12:
Ian: I'll bet your churro can't be a pink frosted sprinkled donut!
Anthony: Oh, yes it CAN!
Ian: Oh, Yeah!? No it can't because your churro isn't pink, it isn't frosted, it isn't sprinkled , and it's definitely not PINK!
Anthony: Well maybe if I ca-
Ian: Well yeah?! yeah?! so you know what? F!#K YOU!!
#13:
Narrator: It's been 13 hours, how do you feel now?
Jim: Must keep working, must never stop working, must always work, I love to work!
Boss: Jim, go home, everybody already left.
(Jim turns to his boss and screen turns red)
Jim (demonically possessed voice): NOT RIGHT NOW CHIEF, I AM IN THE FRICKING ZONE!!
(Jim turns back to his computer and keeps typing)
Jim: (normal voice) I love work I am going I will keep on typing If I stop typing I will die *laughs maniacally*
#14:
Narrator: 15 hour energy, because taking care of yourself with a proper diet and sleep is f**king stupid!
#15:
Dickle: And if you don't believe the Potter Pill will work for you, just listen to these satisfied customers.
(the customers are seen dead)
#16:
Dickle: It's even FDA approved.
Dr. Peacock: (has a gun over his head) This product is FDA approved.
#17:
Ian: What the hell does GPS stand for!?
Anthony: I don't know, it's just a cool combination of letters that don't mean anything, like USA.
#18:
Anthony: Let's take a stab at your mom with my dic- (shows book) -tionary!
#19:
Ian: Why did you tell your grandpa I'm gay?
Anthony: Cause he was old and it made him happy!
#20:
Ian: What was that noise!?
Anthony: I don't know.. You should go check it out by himself, where nobody can hear you, and without bringing any form of weapon, just take this (gives him flashlight).
#1:
Why is canada a safe country?
"Cause the mighty king Goose gives us food to eat. And perverts say please ad thank after each rape..
#2:
Every time I get masterbate, I get angry and throw my turtle against a wall"
"I don't think your masterbating in the RIGHT way"
#3:
Halloween falls on a Friday the 13th this year for the first time in 666 years. I’m totally stabbing someone.
"You two huh?"
#4:
The devil has five letters and so does weed:
"Good for you, here's a lollipop"
#5:
Why are Americans stupid?
"Cause they are close to Canada"
#6:
Why are ALL Americans obese, stupid and religious?
"Because ALL Canadians like hockey"
#7:
Is America planning to invade Vancouver?
"No, that's Japen"
#8:
Do they have trees in America?
"Coarse not"
Why is canada a safe country?
"Cause the mighty king Goose gives us food to eat. And perverts say please ad thank after each rape..
#2:
Every time I get masterbate, I get angry and throw my turtle against a wall"
"I don't think your masterbating in the RIGHT way"
#3:
Halloween falls on a Friday the 13th this year for the first time in 666 years. I’m totally stabbing someone.
"You two huh?"
#4:
The devil has five letters and so does weed:
"Good for you, here's a lollipop"
#5:
Why are Americans stupid?
"Cause they are close to Canada"
#6:
Why are ALL Americans obese, stupid and religious?
"Because ALL Canadians like hockey"
#7:
Is America planning to invade Vancouver?
"No, that's Japen"
#8:
Do they have trees in America?
"Coarse not"
"(singing) I just want to be with my fruit!"
#2:
Guy: What you doing with it anyway?
Christian: You know. It's probably one of those things you SHOULDN'T ask about.
#3:
Jimmy: Let's go do this (loads gun)
Christian: Wait, is that real gu- JIMMY!!
#4:
"That is the blackest thing I ever heard in my life!"
#5:
Jimmy: Oh shit. What do I do?
Christian: Blame it on your dad..
#6:
"look everything's chill.. We'll chill!"
#7:
"My night was differently tighter than yours!"
#8:
Jimmy: Why are you holding a camera?
Christian: I'm taping.
Jimmy: No your not. Your on FaceTime.
Christian: Look. Just let me have this.. I'm bored as fuck over here.
#9:
"(crying) yo, I'm like, gonna kill self!... I just watched that fashion show.. And I realized... I'm never gonna have a girl who's that sexy.. I mean.. How are they all so perfect!?"
#10:
"WOOOOOOOW!!"
#5: HOTDIGGIDYDEMON:
I don't have much to say about this guy..
But he's awesome...
#4: ANGRY BRITISH GUY:
What's not to love about a british guy screaming at traffic and well.... Everything..
#3: LONELY ISLAND:
They became so popular on SNL.
They have their own internet series.
And they probably began the "like a boss" meme..
#2: SMOSH:
I love these guys.
Don't even know why.. :)
But they became one of the highest paid youtube stars. Annual Earnings: $6.7 million.
the Smosh channel has more than 20 million subscribers and 4.6 billion video views.[4] The Smosh team has expanded to include others...
continue reading...
I don't have much to say about this guy..
But he's awesome...
#4: ANGRY BRITISH GUY:
What's not to love about a british guy screaming at traffic and well.... Everything..
#3: LONELY ISLAND:
They became so popular on SNL.
They have their own internet series.
And they probably began the "like a boss" meme..
#2: SMOSH:
I love these guys.
Don't even know why.. :)
But they became one of the highest paid youtube stars. Annual Earnings: $6.7 million.
the Smosh channel has more than 20 million subscribers and 4.6 billion video views.[4] The Smosh team has expanded to include others...
