This is the third and final part of "Charlie," but the end of this just marks the end of the first "episode" of "The Charlie Arc."
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Kyle, Stan, Ike, and Charlie are sitting on the floor in Kyle's room when Mrs. Broflovski (Sheila) knocks on the door and peeks in.
SHEILA: Kyle, sweetie, can I talk to you for a minute?
KYLE: Mo-om!
SHEILA: Now, Kyle!
They walk into the hall. Stan shrugs at Charlie. Ike crawls into her lap.
IKE: Kyle.
SHEILA: Kyle, I don't think I'm comfortable with you playing with your new friend.
KYLE: Why not?
SHEILA: Well, he's dirty and bruised… Did he get in a fight today?
KYLE: No. She came to school like that. And she's a girl, Mom.
SHEILA: Kyle, how many times have I told you to talk with me before you have a girl come to our house?
KYLE: Never. I don't think it's ever come up before.
SHEILA: Well, if that girl starts a fight or hurts any of you boys, you just come get me, all right, Kyle?
KYLE: But—
SHEILA: Kyle.
KYLE: …All right. Sure, Mom.
Sheila kisses him on his forehead.
SHEILA: That's my good little boy.
Kyle walks back into the room.
SHEILA: Keep the door open with a girl in your room, Kyle.
KYLE: Mo-om!
SHEILA: And watch Ike, all right sweetie?
KYLE: Stupid baby.
Charlie is bouncing Ike on her knees and he's giggling. He's saying "Kyle" with every bounce.
KYLE: Shut up, Ike!
CHARLIE: Your little brother's so cute, Kyle.
KYLE: You just think that 'cause you're a girl. And he's not my brother. He's adopted.
CHARLIE: I still think he's cute.
Ike crawls up to Kyle.
IKE: Brother.
KYLE: Shut up, Ike!
IKE: Don't kick the baby.
KYLE: Shut up!
CHARLIE: You're mean, Kyle. I love my little siblings.
KYLE: I bet yours aren't so goddamn annoying, then.
STAN: I hate my sister.
KYLE: EVERYONE hates your sister, Stan. She's such a b—
STAN: Shut up, Kyle!
KYLE (to the tune of "Kyle's Mom is a Bitch"): "Stan's sister is a bitch, she's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world…"
STAN: Don't use that against me, you asshole!
CHARLIE: Jesus, shut up, you guys!
Sheila rushes into the room.
SHEILA: Did I just hear someone say the J word?
All stare at her.
IKE: Kyle.
SHEILA: This is a JEWISH household, young lady, and we NEVER say the J word. Kyle, I think it's about time for your new "friend" to go home. [She leaves the room, mumbling.] And in front of Ike too; what a terrible influence.
CHARLIE: … I'm sorry for saying the J word.
STAN: Don't worry. There's no such thing. Kyle's mom just doesn't like you.
CHARLIE: Oh.
KYLE: Sorry about that.
Charlie looks at the clock. It's 3:56.
CHARLIE: Oh no! I'm going to be late! My mom's gonna kill me!
KYLE (thinking): Kill you?
CHARLIE: I'll see you at school tomorrow, I guess. Bye!
She grabs her backpack and runs from the room.
KYLE: I think something's up.
STAN: So?
KYLE: So… do you want to play undercover spies?
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Kyle and Stan are crouching in some bushes, wearing sunglasses, and carrying fake walkie-talkies. Kyle has binoculars.
KYLE: Chht, Agent Blue, this is Agent Green. Do you read me? Over. Chht.
STAN: Chht. Agent Green, this is Agent Blue. Roger that, I read you loud and clear. Over. Chht.
KYLE: Chht. Ten-four. The target is in visibility at nine-o'clock. Over. Chht.
Charlie is walking as fast as she can in her condition away from the Broflovski house. She looks nervous. The boys are about a block behind her.
KYLE: Deploying jet-packs. Over. Chht.
The two follow her across town and across the train tracks.
STAN: Chht. Agent Green, I think it's about my turn to use the binoculars. Over. Chht.
KYLE: Chht. Negative, Agent Blue. This is my mission, so I get the binoculars. Over. Chht.
STAN [angry]: Chht. Well you look stupid, Agent Green. Over. Chht.
KYLE: Chht. Mission control, this is Agent Green, not giving a shit. Over. Chht.
STAN: Look, do you wanna fight about this?
KYLE: Fine! Whatever. Take the stupid binoculars.
STAN: Wait… Dude, where'd she go?
They scan the sidewalk, but she's gone. Suddenly they hear yelling from the front step of a house. It's the house next to Kenny's. Charlie is at the doorstep, looking down submissively before her angry mother.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: When I say four o'clock, I mean four-fucking-o'clock. Get in here!
She grabs Charlie by the front of her jacket and pulls her inside, slamming the door behind her. Stan and Kyle stare open-mouthed.
STAN: …Dude!
They run up to Kenny's door and ring the doorbell. Kenny opens the door and hiccups.
KYLE: Uh, hey Kenny. Can we use your backyard?
Kenny shrugs, and then hiccups and nods okay. They hear a toilet flush. Cartman comes up laughing.
CARTMAN: Dude, you should've seen the log I just laid. Your crappy plumbing will be backed up for weeks!
Cartman sees Stan and Kyle and frowns.
CARTMAN: Um, Kenny? Do you remember when I explicitly asked you not to invite over these assholes?
KENNY: (I didn't. They just came to the door.)
STAN: Yeah dude, we just need to do something really quick.
CARTMAN (sighing and rolling his eyes): Whatever.
Kyle and Stan, followed by Kenny and Cartman (who stays further back than the others and entertains himself with a Megaman toy), head into Kenny's backyard and crouch in the bushes between the McCormick's and the Pierzynski's. They can here shouting and slamming inside. Suddenly the back door opens up. They duck down. Ms. Pierzynski pushes Charlie outside. Charlie's nose is bleeding.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: And I swear, if that goddamned school has a reason to call me again in the middle of the day, you will live to regret it! You stay out here until I come get you, you understand?
The door slams. Charlie takes a few steps out of the view of the door, then sits down and starts to cry. Then Kenny hiccups. Charlie looks up and is horrified to see the boys. She tries to wipe off the blood onto her sleeve and hide her tears. She looks extremely nervous.
KYLE: Dude, are you okay?
Charlie looks anxiously at the door and then back at the boys. She apprehensively crawls toward them.
CHARLIE (whispering throughout this scene): What are you doing here?
KENNY: (I live here.)
CHARLIE: I know that, I meant those two.
STAN: Who cares, your mom is a psycho! Do you want us to call the police or something?
CHARLIE: No! No. Don't do that. I'm fine.
There's a pause.
STAN: You're joking, right?
CHARLIE: Listen, my mom just has a bad temper. She's really stressed out. It was my fault for being late anyway. I was supposed to be here to watch my little brother and sister.
Stan and Kyle look uneasy. Kenny hiccups.
STAN: Alright dude.
He gets up with his hands in his pockets and walks over to where Cartman is.
KYLE: …Is this where you got all the bruises and stuff?
Charlie looks down, then shrugs.
KYLE: We need to tell somebody.
CHARLIE: No! Please don't tell, Kyle! It's okay. I'm fine.
KYLE: I don't know.
CHARLIE: Promise you won't tell anyone.
Kyle doesn't say anything. Charlie punches him in the arm.
CHARLIE: Promise!
KYLE: Ow, fine! I promise.
CHARLIE: You swear? You really mean it?
KYLE: …I promise not to tell anyone.
Charlie looks calmer.
CHARLIE: Thanks, Kyle.
Kenny hiccups. Ms. Pierzynski's voice can be heard from inside.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: Charlie? Charlie!
CHARLIE [to Kyle and Kenny]: Get away quick.
She crawls back over to where she was before. Kyle and Kenny duck down as the door opens.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: Charlie, I'm sorry, sweetheart. I just wish you wouldn't be late all the time.
CHARLIE: I'm sorry, Mom.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: You know I love you, sweetheart.
CHARLIE: I love you too, Mom.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: Now come on inside. I have work and you have to watch Beck and Davy.
The two disappear into the house. Kenny hiccups. Then they go back into Kenny's yard. Kyle naturally looks troubled. Stan walks up to him.
STAN: This is pretty fucked up right here.
KYLE: Yep.
STAN: Chht. So… what now, Agent Green? Over. Chht.
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The next day at the bus stop, Cartman is once again singing "The Long and Winding Road." This goes on for a bit, and Kenny (who's looking a little pale and sickly) occasionally hiccups.
KYLE: Dammit, would you shut up, fat-ass?
Cartman starts singing louder. The other three groan and cover their ears. Charlie walks up. She looks the same as yesterday but with a swollen nose.
CHARLIE: Hi, guys.
STAN: Hi Charlie. Did your bitch mom beat you up again?
CHARLIE: Shut up! She's not a bitch! This is the bloody nose from yesterday, dumbass.
CARTMAN: I have an idea. Let's play the "bitchy moms" game. I'll go first. Kyle's mom.
KYLE: Hey, shut up, fat-ass!
CARTMAN: What was that? You want to go next? Well okay Kyle. Can you think of a bitchy mom?
Kyle and Charlie glare at him.
CARTMAN: Like, do you know any moms who force their kids to be vegetarians, or beat the living shit out of them, or anything like that?
They keep glaring. Kenny and Stan start laughing. The bus pulls up.
MS. CRABTREE: C'mon! We're runnin' late!
STAN: Hey, shut up, you fucking skank!
MS. CRABTREE: WHAT DID YOU SAY?
STAN: I said, "What's up, you lucky… tank."
MS. CRABTREE: …Oh. Not much, thanks for asking.
The kids get on the bus.
CHARLIE: Hey, did you guys see Terrance and Philip yesterday?
KENNY: (No, we were all too busy not being beaten up by our parents.) Hic.
Stan, Kenny, and Cartman laugh.
CHARLIE: Hey, shut up, you fucking… fuck face or I'm going to… I swear, I…
Her nose starts bleeding again. They continue laughing. Charlie glares and crosses her arms. Kyle, who is sitting across from her, glances around.
KYLE: Uh, Charlie?
CHARLIE: Yeah?
KYLE: You know how you said you didn't want me to talk about—
CHARLIE (in an edgier tone): Yeah?
KYLE: I was wondering if you still were sure—
CHARLIE: I'm sure, Kyle. I'm absolutely sure. Remember: you promised.
KYLE: [Sigh.] Yeah.
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In the classroom…
MR. GARRISON: Okay, children, take your seats now.
CARTMAN (whispering): Hey, Charlie… Guess who I am.
He punches Pip in the stomach, knocking him off his seat.
CHARLIE: Shut up, fat-ass!
MR. GARRISON: That's enough, now, children. It's time to start our oral presentations. Who wants to go first? Alright, Bebe, you're up.
Bebe walks to the front of the class.
BEBE: Ahem. This is a story of trust, of love, of betrayal… But mostly, it's the story of how I was tricked into believing that a girl was a boy, and my inner struggle throughout this experience, and after.
Charlie covers her face with her hands.
MR. GARRISON: Um, you're supposed to talk about a famous scientist from hist—
BEBE: It was a crisp fall afternoon when I entered the elementary school with a dear friend. I had just had my hair done, and it flowed to my waist in curly golden locks. When I entered the room, all of the boys gasped in astonishment at my beauty. Except for Stan, because he's Wendy's boyfriend. He gasped at astonishment at Wendy's beauty.
MR. GARRISON: Bebe, can we—
BEBE: One boy, new, whose countenance I had never before looked upon, remained unmoved by my beauty. I was intrigued, taken aback by his sullen demeanor. But all was not as it seemed.
MR. GARRISON: Okay, C minus. Take your seat Bebe.
BEBE: What? I didn't even get to finish!
MR. GARRISON: We all know what happens. Charlie is a little girl. How embarrassing. Take your seat, Bebe.
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Lunchtime: the boys and Charlie stand in line in front of Chef.
CHEF: Hello, children!
KIDS: Hey, Chef.
CHEF: It's Thursday! And you all know what that means!
BOYS: Salisbury steak!
CHEF: Ha ha, that's right! [He looks at Charlie. Charlie stares back.] Hmm, I don't think I've seen you children in my cafeteria before.
KYLE: Oh, Chef, this is Charlie. She's a girl, but she's not gross.
Charlie smiles, obviously flattered.
CHEF: Nice to see you here, children. Try my delicious Salisbury steak. It's best hot.
CHARLIE: Thanks, Chef.
All of them leave but Kyle.
CHEF: Is something wrong, children?
KYLE: Chef, what would be the best thing to do if I knew someone's mom was hitting them, and hurting them really badly, but I promised that person I wouldn't tell anyone?
CHEF: Children, the best thing to do is always to talk to an adult. You should talk to Mr. Mackey, the cracker counselor. It's never a good idea to keep that kind of thing a secret.
KYLE: Thanks, Chef.
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Meanwhile, at the table…
CARTMAN to Charlie: Um… What do you think you're doing?
CHARLIE: I was going to eat some Salisbury steak, if that's okay with you.
CARTMAN: Oh, yeah, yeah, sure, that's fine… Why don't you go eat that… somewhere else…?
CHARLIE: Why?
CARTMAN: Because I want you to go the fuck away from here. Sheesh. Stupid man-girl.
CHARLIE: I don't care what you want, fatso. Kyle would let me sit here.
CARTMAN: Well Kyle isn't here right now, is he?
CHARLIE: I can sit here, right Stan?
STAN: I don't wanna get in the middle of this.
CHARLIE: …Kenny?
KENNY: Hic.
CHARLIE: Fine. I don't need to sit here. I can go sit with… [She stares blankly at the rest of the student body.] (Incoherent mumbling.)
Charlie walks up to the girls' table. Wendy and Bebe glare at her and look away. Charlie sighs, then goes to sit with Butters.
BUTTERS: Uh, hey there.
CHARLIE: Hi.
BUTTERS: You wanna see my super-cool comic book I made? It's called, "Butter-Man and the Invasion of the Bad Guys."
Charlie doesn't say anything.
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Meanwhile, Kyle returns to the boys' table.
KYLE: Dude, where'd Charlie go?
STAN: Cartman told her to take her shit somewhere else.
KYLE: What? Why the hell'd you do that, you jerk?
CARTMAN: Because, I hate her almost as much as I hate your people, Kyle.
KYLE: You suck.
CARTMAN: "Kyle and Charlie sittin' in a tree. K-I-S-"
KYLE: Shut up! Shut up, Cartman!
CARTMAN (singing): I've waited all my life for you, and now you're here…
KYLE: Damn it! Shut up!
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Back to Butters and Charlie…
BUTTERS: Okay, see, I drew all the pictures and everything. I didn't staple it, 'cause my mom says I'm going to staple my fingers instead of the paper. So I just taped it together instead.
Charlie looks at the comic book. There are stick figures and illegible dialogue bubbles.
CHARLIE: It's… nice, Butters.
Butters looks thrilled.
BUTTERS: You really think so?
CHARLIE: Sure. I mean, it's got… pictures, and characters, and… those look like words, and a story… All the necessary elements for a decent comic book. All right there.
BUTTERS: Aw, shucks, you're the nicest, Charlie. Eric said it was a stupid pile of baby turds.
CHARLIE: He was probably just jealous of all that raw talent. I mean, who wouldn't be?
BUTTERS (tearing up): Charlie… you… that's the nicest thing anybody has ever said to me.
Kyle comes up and sits with them. He looks pissed.
KYLE: Cartman's a smelly pig-ass.
CHARLIE: Yeah, I know.
BUTTERS: Hey Kyle, wanna see my comic book? Charlie says it's "nice," and that I have "raw talent."
Kyle flips through the book. He looks up at Butters, who is smiling eagerly. He looks at Charlie. She smiles and shrugs.
KYLE: Yep, it's definitely nice, all right.
BUTTERS: Whoopee! This is the best day of my life.
Charlie keeps smiling at Kyle. Kyle smiles back nervously.
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Kyle sits with Mr. Mackey in the counseling office.
MR. MACKEY: So, what exactly is it that you wanted to talk about, Kyle? Is everything okay?
KYLE: Yeah… Well, with me, I mean. I kind of wanted to talk with you about someone else.
MR. MACKEY: Well you can tell me anything, m'kay?
KYLE: Yeah. It's about Charlie Pierzynski.
MR. MACKEY: Oh, the new girl in your class?
KYLE: Yeah. Um, I saw her yesterday after school, and… well, I saw her mom hitting her and yelling at her. I'm pretty sure it's her mom who gave her all her bruises.
MR. MACKEY: Thank goodness you told me, Kyle. Telling an adult is always the right thing to do, m'kay? I promise, I'll do everything I can to deal with this issue and help little Charlie.
KYLE: Um, Mr. Mackey?
MR. MACKEY: Yes, Kyle?
KYLE: Could you promise not to tell Charlie that I told you?
MR. MACKEY: Of course, Kyle. Confidentiality is our only policy, m'kay?
KYLE: …M'kay.
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On the bus on the way home, Kenny looks pale and tired. He's hiccupping almost constantly now. Kyle and Stan sit with each other and Charlie sits with Kenny behind them. Cartman is sitting nearby by himself.
CHARLIE: Wow, Kenny, you don't look so good.
Kenny, completely detached from reality, just hiccups.
CHARLIE: Guys, I think Kenny's real sick.
STAN: Yeah. He's probably gonna die soon.
CHARLIE: What?
STAN: Yeah, he does it all the time. No one really cares anymore.
KENNY (angrily): (You guys are assholes!) Hic.
CARTMAN: Hey, guys… Guess who I am. [He punches Kenny from across the aisle.] "Hey, you dumb-ass kid! I'm gonna beat the shit out of you! Go… play with a doll, you stupid girl!"
This time, all four of the others glare at him. The bus stops, and the five get off. Kenny hiccups.
CARTMAN: Well, screw you guys, I'm going home.
He walks away. Kenny hiccups, then vomits and collapses.
CHARLIE: Jeez! Are you okay?
Kenny slowly gets back to his feet. He nods, then hiccups. Then the bus pulls back.
MS. CRABTREE: Hey, you forgot your medieval armaments on the bus again!
She throws a heap of chains, swords, maces, etc. on top of Kenny and drives away. Blood seeps out from under the pile.
STAN: Oh my God, they killed Kenny!
KYLE: You bastard!
There's a pause as Stan and Kyle look at the bloody heap. Charlie does too, but open-mouthed and horrified.
CHARLIE: Oh my God! He's dead!
STAN: Yep. Told you.
CHARLIE: …Oh my God!
Kyle approaches Charlie.
KYLE: Um, Charlie? Do you want to come over to my house?
CHARLIE: I think I'd better get home early today. I don't want to get in trouble again.
KYLE: Oh… yeah, okay.
CHARLIE: But Kyle?
KYLE: Yeah?
CHARLIE: Thanks for keeping my secret. I know you just wanted to help, but telling would have probably just caused problems.
KYLE: Oh. Uh… you're welcome.
Charlie walks away. Kyle looks worried.
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Outside of the McCormick and Pierzynski houses, Charlie walks up to her front door. Before she can open it, her mother does.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: You had better have an answer for me!
CHARLIE: W-What?
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: Don't get smart with me, you little skank! Who were you complaining about my parenting to, huh? Your little friend the school guidance counselor? You are going to live to regret this, you mark my words.
She grabs Charlie drags her into the house. The sounds of shouting and muffled cries are heard. Then screaming, then silence.
Ms. PIERZYNSKI: …Charlie? …Get up, honey. Charlie? …Charlotte, you get up. Stop pretending. …Oh God.
Ms. Pierzynski runs out of her front door. Mrs. McCormick comes out of her house at the same time.
Mrs. McCORMICK: You keep that little demon of yours quiet, you hear me? One more screamin' fit and I'm calling the police!
Ms. Pierzynski just runs away from the houses.
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Kyle walks up to the Pierzynski house. He knocks on the door once, and it opens by itself. Kyle looks around nervously, then walks in.
KYLE: Uh… Um, hello? Is anybody here?
Kyle walks further into the house. The lights are all of. It's a mess.
KYLE: …Charlie?
BECCA: She's sleeping.
Kyle yelps, startled. A little girl, about four or five, comes out of the shadows.
KYLE: …Who are you?
BECCA: I'm Becca Rezinski. Charlie is sleeping.
Kyle stares at her, then walks further into the house. A baby is crying in a crib in the main room.
KYLE: Charlie?
He reaches the bathroom and sees Charlie lying unconscious on the floor. She's covered in blood and vomit. Kyle covers his mouth, horrified.
BECCA: Do we get pizza tonight?
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That's the end of "Charlie." The next episode of "The Charlie Arc" is "Brainwashing." Check it out if you're interested!
