Chapter Fourteen
I didn’t know how to feel. How was someone expected to feel after they had almost been killed? Someone was gasping. What was wrong with them? As I tried to concentrate, I realized it was myself gasping. I think I was starting to hyperventilate.
“ Grandpa! She needs help!” Renesmee cried beside me. They were trying to get me back to the house. I couldn’t see anything. My vision had black dots clouding it and I felt woozy.
“ She’s going into shock. We need to get her somewhere she can lie down as soon as possible.” I distantly heard Carlisle’s calm voice. I felt like I was in the fog. Everything was muffled and cloudy, obscuring my hearing and vision. I felt like I was slowly suffocating. From my cloudy world, I barely felt myself being lifted and then wind rushing by. Suddenly, I was surrounded by the sickly sweet scent of the Cullen’s house. I felt myself being laid gently down onto something soft.
“ She’s going to be all right, isn’t she?” Renesmee asked, her voice slightly panicked.
“ Of course. She has never been in that traumatic situation before. Her mind doesn’t know what to do, so its just shutting out the bad memories.” Carlisle’s voice reached my mind some how.
So that was what was happening to me. No wonder I was in my own little foggy world.
“Look! Her eyelashes are fluttering!” Renesmee said a few minutes later.
Were they? I couldn’t feel them.
“ She’s still out of it. Hopefully she’ll come around soon. I need to go check Evan’s bandages. Ill be back in a little bit.” I could barely hear the soft swish as he moved away. Wow. They were quiet. The fog surrounding me seemed to thicken, and for a while, I fell into unconsciousness.
“ Where is she, Nessie?” Jacob’s voice pulled at me, trying to get me to come out of the fog. I tried to go toward his voice, but I was lost…
“ She’s lying in there…But Jake, I don’t know how she is. Grandpa says she’ll be ok…but, she’s totally out of it.” Renesmee’s voice sounded tired. How long had I been like this?
“ Well let me try.” Jacob’s deep voice sounded like music to my ears. Maybe he wasn’t mad at me now.
“Ok great. I’m going to go sit with Evan. Maybe you’ll have better luck than I did.” Renesmee softly swished away.
As Jacob came closer, I could smell him. His slightly musky, and woodsy sent surrounded me overcoming the sickly sweet sent of the vampires. I would choose his smell any day.
“ Mika. I don’t know if you can hear me or not, but I have some things I have to say.”
I was dimly aware of his warm hand brushing over my forehead.
“ I should have never gotten mad at you. Nessie told me everything. How you just wanted to help her, since you felt like you took me away from her.”
He sighed heavily.
“ If I hadn’t have gotten mad at you, you would have never had to feel like you needed to leave to make things better. And now, because of me…You are like this. Mika, I swear, never to put you in this kind of position again. And I understand if you never want to see me again.” His deep voice trailed off. I struggled to escape from my incoherent state. I need to be able to tell him that I still loved him. And that I never wanted to leave him again. I struggled to escape the fog that was trying to take over my mind. I wanted Jacob. I needed Jacob.
“ Mika?” Jacob’s voice was hopeful. I battled the fog, trying to open my eyes to see his beautiful face.
“ Come on, sweetheart. You can do it.” Jacob encouraged softly.
I struggled, and suddenly my eyes were open. The room was bathed in a soft light. I blinked and turned my head to look at him. His face was happy, but deep in his chocolate brown eyes was a hint of fear.
“ Jacob.” My voice came out surprisingly normal.
“ Mika, I can leave. If you don’t want me here.”
I sat up slowly. His tall frame was sitting beside me on the bed. He looked gorgeous. His black hair was starting to get a little longer, and his eyes almost melted me.
“ Don’t be stupid, Jake.”
And then my arms were around his neck, and my lips were on his. I could feel his lips tilt up into a smile, and then he was kissing me back. He leaned me back on the bed, his elbow propped to keep him from squishing me. I ran my hands up in his hair, grabbing and pulling him closer. As he kissed me deeply, I had a sense of belonging. I was home.
I didn’t know how to feel. How was someone expected to feel after they had almost been killed? Someone was gasping. What was wrong with them? As I tried to concentrate, I realized it was myself gasping. I think I was starting to hyperventilate.
“ Grandpa! She needs help!” Renesmee cried beside me. They were trying to get me back to the house. I couldn’t see anything. My vision had black dots clouding it and I felt woozy.
“ She’s going into shock. We need to get her somewhere she can lie down as soon as possible.” I distantly heard Carlisle’s calm voice. I felt like I was in the fog. Everything was muffled and cloudy, obscuring my hearing and vision. I felt like I was slowly suffocating. From my cloudy world, I barely felt myself being lifted and then wind rushing by. Suddenly, I was surrounded by the sickly sweet scent of the Cullen’s house. I felt myself being laid gently down onto something soft.
“ She’s going to be all right, isn’t she?” Renesmee asked, her voice slightly panicked.
“ Of course. She has never been in that traumatic situation before. Her mind doesn’t know what to do, so its just shutting out the bad memories.” Carlisle’s voice reached my mind some how.
So that was what was happening to me. No wonder I was in my own little foggy world.
“Look! Her eyelashes are fluttering!” Renesmee said a few minutes later.
Were they? I couldn’t feel them.
“ She’s still out of it. Hopefully she’ll come around soon. I need to go check Evan’s bandages. Ill be back in a little bit.” I could barely hear the soft swish as he moved away. Wow. They were quiet. The fog surrounding me seemed to thicken, and for a while, I fell into unconsciousness.
“ Where is she, Nessie?” Jacob’s voice pulled at me, trying to get me to come out of the fog. I tried to go toward his voice, but I was lost…
“ She’s lying in there…But Jake, I don’t know how she is. Grandpa says she’ll be ok…but, she’s totally out of it.” Renesmee’s voice sounded tired. How long had I been like this?
“ Well let me try.” Jacob’s deep voice sounded like music to my ears. Maybe he wasn’t mad at me now.
“Ok great. I’m going to go sit with Evan. Maybe you’ll have better luck than I did.” Renesmee softly swished away.
As Jacob came closer, I could smell him. His slightly musky, and woodsy sent surrounded me overcoming the sickly sweet sent of the vampires. I would choose his smell any day.
“ Mika. I don’t know if you can hear me or not, but I have some things I have to say.”
I was dimly aware of his warm hand brushing over my forehead.
“ I should have never gotten mad at you. Nessie told me everything. How you just wanted to help her, since you felt like you took me away from her.”
He sighed heavily.
“ If I hadn’t have gotten mad at you, you would have never had to feel like you needed to leave to make things better. And now, because of me…You are like this. Mika, I swear, never to put you in this kind of position again. And I understand if you never want to see me again.” His deep voice trailed off. I struggled to escape from my incoherent state. I need to be able to tell him that I still loved him. And that I never wanted to leave him again. I struggled to escape the fog that was trying to take over my mind. I wanted Jacob. I needed Jacob.
“ Mika?” Jacob’s voice was hopeful. I battled the fog, trying to open my eyes to see his beautiful face.
“ Come on, sweetheart. You can do it.” Jacob encouraged softly.
I struggled, and suddenly my eyes were open. The room was bathed in a soft light. I blinked and turned my head to look at him. His face was happy, but deep in his chocolate brown eyes was a hint of fear.
“ Jacob.” My voice came out surprisingly normal.
“ Mika, I can leave. If you don’t want me here.”
I sat up slowly. His tall frame was sitting beside me on the bed. He looked gorgeous. His black hair was starting to get a little longer, and his eyes almost melted me.
“ Don’t be stupid, Jake.”
And then my arms were around his neck, and my lips were on his. I could feel his lips tilt up into a smile, and then he was kissing me back. He leaned me back on the bed, his elbow propped to keep him from squishing me. I ran my hands up in his hair, grabbing and pulling him closer. As he kissed me deeply, I had a sense of belonging. I was home.
