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posted by e2mma2weasle3
100 ways to annoy the Cullen’s.

1.) Take Jasper to an African American Support center and tell everyone there his full name.

2.) Talk in a really bad Texas ancient when around Jasper.

3.) Tell Carlisle that Esme has been having an affair with Aro Volturi

4.) Dangle Alice's favorite pair of shoes over your head when you are standing on the opposite side of the boundary line.

5.) Fill Edward's iPod with rap songs

6.) Fill Emmett’s with classical

7.) Tell Alice that Jasper looks at porn

8.) Pay ten guys to look at Rosalie and go "Ewe"

9.) Spray paint Edward's car pink

10.) Tell him it was Alice's idea

11.) Then when he gets mad tell him that Bella likes it, just to calm him down

12.) Then suggest anger management classes

13.) Tell Jasper he should be a therapist

14.) Tell anyone of the Cullen’s that they should go to a tanning salon

15.) Tell Rosalie that Alice is pregnant

16.) Tell her that it was Emmett who did it

17.) Tell Jasper the same thing

18.) Video tape the fight

19.) Then play it back for Carlisle

20.) Fill Edward's closet with team Jacob shirts

21.) Ask Edward "Gee, I haven't seen Mike Newton lately; bella would probably know where he is right?"

22.) Break all the mirrors in Rosalie’s room.

23.) Tell her that her face did it

24.) Suggest that she get a makeover to prevent it from happening again

25.) Sign Jasper up to run the school's blood drive

26.) Call Jasper the walking talking "chill pill"

27.) Say to Emmett "wow, you really let yourself go, have you considered working out?"

28.) When ever Edwards too busy to help you with something say "Oh that's ok, I'm sure Jacob or mike could help."

29.) Say to Edward "hey Edward my car's broken, I was wondering if you've seen Rosalie around so she could fix it."

30.) Then when he offers to do it start laughing hysterically.

31.) Then say "Oh that's ok I'll just ask Jacob."

32.) Tell Rosalie that Leah is prettier than her

33.) Subscribe Esme for parenting magazines.

34.) Then tell her that they were actually meant for Edward

35.) Tell him that you'd feel much better for Renessmee if he also took some classes

36.) When he refuses tell him "Well fine! If you don't care about your daughter's safety!"

37.) Die Renessmee's hair blonde

38.) Then have her start crying and screaming "Now daddy won't like me!" right in front of Edward

39.) Sell Edward's piano

40.) Then tell him it's time he buckled down and started saving up for Renessmee's college fund

41.) Deflate all of Edward's car tires at school

42.) Then hide the knife you used to do it in Jasper's locker

43.) Tell everyone in history class the Jasper isn't a descendent of Jasper Whitlock but that he is Jasper Whitlock

44.) Tell them that he's here to kill everyone in the school

45.) And if they don't believe you show them the knife in his locker

46.) Or if you don't want to be that harsh; In the middle of History class when learning about the Confederate army, point to the picture of Jasper in the book and shout "Hey Jasper! That looks just like you!"

47.) Tell every girl at school that Edward broke up with Bella

48.) Then give out Bella's phone number to them

49.) Then laugh when she starts to scream at him about all the girls calling her asking for Edward

50.) Do the same thing for Emmett and Rosalie

51.) Then Jasper and Alice

52.) Then when all the guys accuse you of it, innocently claim "I was only trying to give you guys more variety"

53.) Then let them know you’re available

54.) When they get even more upset sate; "Well you don't want to be stuck with the same girl for the rest of your lif-, Oh, yea, sorry..."

55.) Visit the hospital and try to get Carlisle to go insane; by using a fan to blow the scent of the blood in his face.

56.) Or better yet, splash some of the patient’s blood in his face.

57.) Then when he asks what you’re doing tell him that he looked thirsty

58.) Tell Edward that he's a show off

59.) Ask Edward if he can fly

60.) Tell any one of the Cullen’s that you’re being a vampire for Halloween

61.) Then ask them where they bought their costumes

62.) Replace all the blood in their house with red cool-aid

63.) Take pictures of their reactions when they drink it.

64.) Trade Edward's car for a mini-van

65.) Then make comments like "Can I get a ride to school soccer mom?"

66.) Put one of Bella's bra's in Emmett's coat pocket

67.) Then think "Hey what's that doing in there?" When in front of Edward

68.) Say things to Edward like "Hey Bella looks cold, want me to call Jacob?"

69.) Clean all of the stuff out of every Cullen's room and throw it over the boundary line

70.) Tell everyone at school that the Cullen guys are actually girls

71.) Then prove it by showing them how they don't even flinch when you kick them in the balls

72.) Then do the same things for Carlisle at the hospital

73.) Order tombstones for every single Cullen

74.) When they ask why tell them you provoked the Volturi and blamed it on them

75.) Then actually do it

76.) Ask Jasper if he could be your square dancing partner

77.) Constantly remind the Cullen’s that if they die they're going to hell

78.) Then remind them about 74

79.) Send Edward love letters from Jane

80.) Smash Edward's CD collection

81.) Then when he asks why tell him there was a spider

82.) Say things to Jasper like "Wow, for someone who can control emotions, you really don't have any."

83.) Say stuff to Rosalie like "Ewe! What's that on your face?"

84.) Buy Alice a crystal ball

85.) Put black hair dye in Rosalie’s shampoo

86.) Then tell Bella that Edward likes it

87.) Constantly remind Alice that she might not actually be in love with Jasper

88.) Spill blood on their floor

89.) Then laugh when Jasper starts to lick it up

90.) Sing in your head “I know a song that gets on Edward’s every nerve!” When around Edward

91.) Steal each and everyone ones of their credit/debit cards and max them out

92.) Say to Jasper that you told Carlisle about your depression problems and that he told you to talk to Jasper about it

93.) Change your mind about something 50,000 times so Alice gets confused

94.) Buy Edward a puppy

95.) Suggest that he name it Jacob

96.) Tell Edward that his body glitter is fading

97.) Laugh anytime Edward says something corny (I don’t think anything he says is corny.)

98.) Constantly tell Edward that he’s is going to end up killing Bella

99.) Then laugh when he says that he won’t

And if you really want to piss them off…

100.) Have them pick a day where they all circle up and talk about their “problems.”
posted by LexisFaith
Sorry it has been so long guys! I am in Myrtle Beach for my fall break :) here with Jessica :) I have been pretty busy but I'm free to write you. Hope this will be good a make up for it ~Alexis.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Edward POV

Nice move Cullen. Just tell her about how you want more kids with her. That will warm her up.

I silently cursed myself for opening my mouth. Bella just stared at me with her Bambie eyes, her mouth gaping. I really shouldn't have said anything.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. I mean you only confessed to me that you actually...
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posted by moolah
Chapter Seven:
Lexy’s P.O.V:
I looked over at Nessie who was giving me the ‘answer the phone look’. “I don’t know who it is!” I confessed. She rolled her eyes at me and took my phone. “Then I’ll answer it.” She pressed the ‘speaker’ button and then pushed ‘answer’
“Hello, Renesmee Cullen, may I help you?” “This is Alexis Cullen’s phone.” Renesmee rolled eyes. “So? I’m her twin sister. Who are you?” The man sounded guilty of something. “I’m Carlos Penne; the house service. I was told to stop by the Cullen household for a service? I called to make...
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new moon movie
new moon movie
If you're a diehard Twilighter, you might wonder just how different New Moon the film is from the book. Below, we name 20 ways the movie deviates from Meyer's tome – and works all the better for it.
Way more shirtless boys!
We all hoped to get a glimpse of Edward's alabaster chest in Volterra, but who knew we'd get to see so much hot werewolf skin? Thankfully, the Wolf Pack run such high temperatures and explode away their clothes so frequently that cut-off jeans and no shirt are their shared ensemble of choice.
We get more fights, including an awesome Volturi throw down.
New Moon the book is...
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posted by joe-edwardfan
A CURSED STORY!
Once apon a time there was a powerful king ruling London.
The legend says a witch cursed the kings only daughter because he killed all the witches in London except for his own.
As its told the curse forbids the princess to ever feels or falls in love(but she can just feel love for the witche’s son Damien who is in love with the princess) unless the witch that's has casted the spell on her shall die drowning in her own blood at an eclipse.
    Witch: a witch is a person that has special abilities and is immortal they look like a human and blood runs in their...
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posted by lollipopszx3
I only put it here because I wanted people to know about it... Any other chapter on www.fanpop.com/spots/thevolturigirl

Hell on Earth

BPOV

The moment I stepped into the classroom I knew it was going to be hell.

"Ms. Swan!" said a voice I've hated since I was 18. "Cullen! What the hell are you doing here?" I screamed. There standing there was Edward Cullen. Once my love, my life, my everything now my worst enemy.

"Ms. Swan! That language won't be tollerated in my class!" He smirked. I ran out the door.

This can not be happening! I can not be student-teaching Edward's class! We freaking hate each...
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Hope everyone likes it



Wile Jake and Nessie went to go hunt and Seth got done eatting Esme out of house and home the rest of us had a family meeting about our win. "so Emmett how do you feel about our victory" Bella asked "well I am glad we won and that no harm came to Nessie but I am still pissed that they did not put up A better fight". "Oh get over yourself" Rose replied "It's easy for you to say all you have to do is stand there and look pretty". "If you think that is an easy job why don't you try it then". She said in her normal tone. "Ok you two that is enough". Esme yelled from the...
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Hey...This is like some sort of twilight fiction...yeah. For those who read my Kayla series this is what I was talking about...For those who didn't...yeah just read it...and my Kayla series if you want lol...Woo.. Enjoy!




11 years ago….



All of the furniture was pushed against the walls and my mom sat in a chalk circle she had drawn on the wooden floor. I sat at the edge, watching her. She was writing on a piece of parchment with a quill and ink. In front of her was a cauldron that she had brewed a simple protection potion in. Next to the cauldron was a lighter. She finished writing her spell...
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sorry, just couldn't kill Bella :-)Last one will be up soon :D enjoy

Bella's pov

It was still black in front of me but I heard voices, how could I hear voices, wasn’t I death. I start listening to the voices, trying to make sense to what they are saying.
“Why isn’t she waking up, it’s been a week” I heard Edward say. How could I heard Edward’s voice, am I not death. I think I’m not death, I wasn’t even sure yet.
“She will wake up, when she’s ready, she’s been thru a hard time” I Heard Carlisle voice answering Edward’s question.
I guess I need to wake up someday so I opened...
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posted by just_bella
WOW I can't believe this is part 10 alreay, i'm so glad that people enjoy this. It's really fun/addicting to write. Here's the next chapter :)

--------------------------------------------------
Recap:

Esme came over and put her hands on my shoulder and gently kissed my head.

"Oh honey, you must have been so scared. I'm sorry to hear that your old family was so horrible to you." She said, I smiled at the way she said "old family."

I smiled up at her and looked around at my true family. Esme the caring/loving mother who would do anything for us. Emmett the big/strong/caring brother who acted tougher...
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posted by twilight-7
I woke to the feel of someone stroking me cheek. The cold, gentle fingers were soothing to me and I didn’t want to open my eyes but I heard his velvet voice speak to me.
“June 20.”
“Hmm?” I murmured. I was still half asleep. I had no idea what he was on about.
“June 20,” he repeated softly. “My birthday.”
I was wide awake now. “Your birthday?”
I looked up into his golden eyes and saw them full of some kind of emotion.
He nodded.
“When were you born?” I asked. “What year?”
“1901,” Edward said, quietly. “In Chicago. I was seventeen when Carlisle changed me. I was dying...
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In some very reassuring news, Reuters is reporting that Summit Entertainment has acquired the rights to the rest of the saga!

It has hired "Twilight" scribe Melissa Rosenberg, a writer/producer on Showtime's "Dexter," to adapt the first two. "Breaking Dawn," has not attached a writer.

While this does NOT confirm that the rest of the books will be turned into movies, this is certainly very good news for the franchise. We'll keep you updated!

UPDATE: Robert Pattinson has a few comments about New Moon that he made to the Chicago Tribune:

A sequel [aka New Moon] may get the green light this month, he said.

"They will literally decide the next day or the day after" once the movie opens, Pattinson said. "I think they only have plans to do the second one. There's no script for the third one. The script is already done for the second one."
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