Our cast for this Celebrity Jeopardy skit is

Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game show wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Master Sword as Windwakerguy430, AKA Nick Craig
and Applejack as herself

Alex: And welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy.
Audience: *Cheering*
Alex: Because of what happened just before the commercial, I'd like to apologize to all blind ponies, and children.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: With that said, let's take a look at the scores. Nick Craig, the creator of What's Your Take, has set a new jeopardy record by buzzing in 2,000 times, and never answering a question.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: *Buzzes in* Yes, thank you. Jeopardy! Yes. I have heeled you my boy, you are heeled.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: We have found a mustache for John Travlolta.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: And speaking of John Travolta, I watched the movie Grease!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *A little annoyed* Thank you. Thank you.
Audience: *Clapping*
Alex: Moving on. Applejack has no score at all, because, she's mostly been talking about her recent marriage with her brother.
Audience: *Laughing*
Applejack: Big Macintosh my love, if you're watching this, make sure to put on Appplebloom's diapers before supper, and she's not allowed to leave the farm until I get back.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: That's... Beautiful. And finally, Sean the hedgehog is also here, let's move on to double jeopardy, and the categories are-
Sean: Not so fast Trebek!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I really thought that was going to work.
Sean: Well you were wrong old timer. I pose a conundrum to you, a riddle if you will.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *Angry* I don't want to here it.
Sean: What's the difference between you, and a mallard with a cold?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: One is a sick duck, and, I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your grand daughter is a whore.
Audience: *Laughing, and cheering*
Sean: *Laughs*
Alex: Wonderful. Let's take a look at the categories. They are...

Potent Potables
Point to your own head
Letters or numbers
Will this hurt if you put it in your mouth?
An album cover
Make any noise
And finally, Famous Muppet Frogs

Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I should add, that the correct answer to every question in the last category is Kermit.
Nick: *Buzzes in* Yes, thank you. Kermit, and John Wayne going, it's not easy being green pilgrim. It's like Schwarzenegger going ja, I'm Kermit The Frog, ja. That's me. Schwarzenegger, Kermit.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *To Nick* You might be mentally retarded.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: For once, I agree with Sean. Alright Applejack, we'll start with you.
Applejack: I'll take giraffes for a billion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Let's just go with letters, or numbers for 200. And the answer is... 5. Is five a letter, or a number?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: The number 5. Is it a number?
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: *Buzzes in* It was a beautiful thing. Right now, somepony is at his house saying, what the hell you doin boy? Get them parts for my '51 pick up truck.
Alex: Thank you, Mr. Craig.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: *Buzzes*
Alex: You already rang in.
Nick: Yes, it's a beautiful thing though, a monocle whinskey is at home going, ahoserugisoihsegkegsgjeh.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Thank you. Thank you. Anyone else?
Nick: *Buzzes in*
Alex: Mr. Craig, I hate you.
Nick: But I love you!
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: It's like Jesse Helms, and Michael Jackson going, yimotacobell! Yes.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You're a very sick stallion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Anyone else besides Mr. Craig?

No one buzzed in, and the out of time bell rang.

Alex: 5 is of course a number.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay Applejack. Sadly, it's still your board.
Audience: *Laughing*
Applejack: I'll take T.V shows, and movies about my wedding for 300.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: For the last time, that's not a category. Sean the hedgehog, why don't you pick?
Sean: Well, the game is afoot. I'll take Anal Bum Cover for 7,000.
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, cheering, and whistling*
Alex: That's An Album Cover, not Anal Bum Cover.
Sean: I can read Trebek. That says Anal Bum Cover. I spent five years trying to invent the Anal Bum Cover. Failing to do so is my greatest regret.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You have lead a horrifying life.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: The category is Album Cover, and the answer is, The Beatles' White Album Cover Was This Color.
Applejack: *Rings in*
Alex: Applejack?
Applejack: Who are The Beatles?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I'm sorry, that's wrong.
Applejack: No, I'm asking you who The Beatles are. I never heard of them.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: *Rings in* Ah yes, The Beatles, yes. What if they were The Vriendscoupe Beatles? Yes. They'd be in the back seat singing, I wanna hold your five Fig Newtons. Yes.

Author's note, Vriendscoupe is the MLP version of Volkswagen.

Alex: For the love of god, shut your mouth.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: I'll tell you what, let's just go to Final Jeopardy. The category is.... You know what? You guys just decide.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You each ask your own question, and then answer it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: There is no way you can get this wrong, because you're asking the question.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Ask yourself anything at all, and then answer it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You have to be the dumbest ponies ever to mess this up.

The timer ran out.

Alex: And now, let's see how you managed to mess this up.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Nick Craig wrote nothing, because he stuck his pen through his own hoof.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nick: Yes. Yes, this is like a play written by Shakespeare, and one of the characters stabs himself to be with his special somepony, and says, Ow! This is painful! But I'm doing this to be with you!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Don't ever come here again.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: Applejack, asked herself this question. What sound does a doggy make?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Fine. Her answer is.. *Finds out that she doesn't know the answer* You didn't know the answer.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You couldn't answer your own question?
Applejack: It was hard.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, let's see what Sean wrote. *Looking at his answer* Uh...
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Is that what I think it is? Yeah, that's a human having sex with me.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Sean: Come on, let everyone see my work!
Alex: No, we're not going to do that. Thanks for watching, goodnight.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*

On the next part of this episode, it's The Story Of Corporal Agarn, and every other pony in F Troop.