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posted by 67Dodge
'You alright Lily?' asked Skipper. The whole even took them by storm. 'I'm fine, okay? Don't freak out Skipper,' reassured Lily. 'Any insight as to why Private killed all those girls?' asked Skipper. 'Yes and no apparently,' said the Psychiatrist. 'What do you mean by 'yes and no'?! There's only one answer to everything!!' yelled Skipper. 'Uh uh Skipper, that's where you're wrong, you see, Private's mother is quite alive oh yes,' replied the Psychiatrist. 'But she's dead!! I even saw her mummified corpse in-' was all Lily could say before being interupted. 'Wrong again!! She's alive in Private's fractured psyche, you see, it turns out, Private has an alter ego, his mother. What really happened was this. When Private's father died, he and his mother lived as if they were the only ones who existed in the world. When she found a lover however, he was driven head over heels with jealousy. He killed them both by poisoning their tea and he felt veeeeeerry guilty about it, so he 'erased the crime' by 'bringing his mother back to life' in his mind. Using his taxidermist skills, he stole his mother's corpse, and preserved her dead body,' explained the Psychiatrist.
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'And that's all?' asked Skipper. 'Not quite, when he's 'mum' he acts, dresses, talks, and does things as 'she' would. When he's Private, he does what he normally does. You see, now he's dominated by his mother form. Therefore, 'she's' jealous of women that try to flirt with them,' answered the Psychiatrist. 'Do you know if he has the $40,000 with him?' asked the sheriff. 'This crime was made for passion, not profit, the money must be in the swamp with Marlene's corpse inside,' argued the Psychiatrist. The sheriff then pulled out his walki talkie and called. 'Yeah, base to Chief Brody, search that swamp for any trace of the missing otter okay?' asked the sheriff. 'And what did the pentagram mean?' asked Lily. 'The pentagram's arms on the star each represented Private's victims. The first two being his mother and his stepfather, the last three being recent victims,' explained the Psychiatrist. 'Should I get him this blanket? That jail cell is quite chilly at night,' asked the sheriff. 'That'll be fine, go ahead and give him that warm silky blanket, he'll freeze less likely,' suggested the Psychiatrist. 'And why did he preserve his mother's body?' asked Skipper. 'Because he didn't want to feel like he's all alone talking to himself, he talks to the corpse, and 'answers back' for it if you may,' answered the Psychiatrist.
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'So all of this was caused because an idiot thinks he's his own mother?!' asked Skipper, outraged. 'Well...... Yes, basically...' replied the psychiatrist. 'Wow, all of this couldve been fucking avoided if I said 'Marlene, let's not go to that motel, it looks ugly'?!' asked Skipper again, 'I'm outta here, this is too retarded for me to really think about at all, if you need me, I'll be in starbucks.' Then, Skipper walked out, tearing up, and slammed the door. 'I'm sorry for his behavior, I really am, I don't know why my sister lived with him at all in the first place,' said Lily. 'Meh, me neither, would you like to join him at starbucks? I would love a nice relaxing coffee after a few hours of meticulously scribbling notes and investigating a psycho's mind,' asked the psychiatrist. Then, Lily smiled, for the first time in 8 days. 'Sure, and I could probably get to his charming, handsome side outta him very well,' said Lily. 'Good then!!! We'll go to starbucks, then we can go to the movies and eat popcorn!!' cheered the psychiatrist, walking to the door. They both headed to the Eleanor that Skipper had outside, shut the door, and drove away from the jail.
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When Private got his blanket, he smiled cheerfully, blushing a bit. 'Why thank you there,' he said feebly. When they shut the door, Private started thinking, in his mother's tone. 'It's sad when a mother has to speak the words that condemn her own son. But I couldn't allow them to believe that I would commit murder. They'll put him away now as I should have years ago. He was always bad, and in the end he intended to tell them I killed those girls and that man. As if I could do anything except just sit and stare--like one of his stuffed birds. Well, they know I can't move a finger. And I won't. I'll just sit here and be quiet, just in case they do suspect me.
They're probably watching me. Well, let them. Let them see what kind of person I am,' thought Private, then a small fly landed on his flipper. 'I'm not even going to swat that fly. I hope they are watching. They'll see. They'll see, and they'll know, and they'll say.... 'Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly.' an evil, malicious grin formed on Private's face.
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