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posted by OmegaLeader
(Found it on the internet thought it was pretty interesting.)

You call your victim and you want to confuse them. No laughing or anything, just a normal voice like someone would call you. Me and my friends do this a lot.


Script:
You call the person...

Person: Hello?
You: Hello?
Person: Uh, hi. Who is this and what do you want?
You: What? Oh no no no no no! It is YOU who is calling me. Ok, so what did YOU need?
Person: No no I didn't call you. You called me. Wait, who is this??
You: NO! I didn't call you! You are the one who called me! Now i ask one more time who are you and why did you call my at this time of day/night?
Person: What???? Okay I'm going to hang up now. Bye.
You: Ok bye.

(Call same person again)

Person: Hello?
You: Hello? Who is this?
Person: Who are you? (or he might say ITS YOU AGAIN)
You: Oh My Gosh stop calling me!
Person: No, YOU stop calling ME! I did not call you.
You: Oh yes you did, and stop calling me!
*Hang up*
(A minute later, call same person and make it up as you go or say the same thing until the person gets annoyed. LOL)





DEALING WITH TELEMARKETERS:
[Fake Robbery/Shooting Prank]
When a campaigner or telemarketer calls you, listen to what they have to say then stop them midsentence. Tell them, "Could you hang on a second, I think there's somebody at my door." Set the phone down and pretend to answer the door. Then yell in the background, "Who are you?! Get outta my house!!" Try to make it sound like a struggle is taking place and then pop a paper bag next to the phone. Start to scream and fall, then pop a second paper bag and go silent. You will hear them saying. "Oh my God!! Sir?! Are you alright?! Oh my God!!" At this point, either hang up or pick up the phone and say, "So what are you doin' tonight?"
Another idea is, you could call a place like Nintendo (I've included the number below) and ask them how to fix a problem with your Wii, then stop the representative midsentence and start the prank.



When a telemarketer calls you, act really interested in what they have to say, but stop them midsentence and say "Well look, I'm really interested in what you have to say, but I'm kind of busy right now so could I have your home number and give you a call later?" They will explain to you that they cannot give out their personal information. Say to them "Oh, I understand, because you don't want to have people bothering you at home right?" When they tell you that that is the reason say "Good, well now you know how I feel." And hang up.



PRANKING NEIGHBORS/FRIENDS:
[Return of an old friend]
This prank works especially well if you have a phonebook or neighborhood directory. Pick out a target and have their address ready. Call them and pretend to be a long lost high school friend. For example, if their name is Debby say, "Hi Debby! It's Lisa Meyers from high school!" Act nice to them and ask them how life is going and where life took them after high school. If they don't sound convinced, then say something like, "So are you still over there on Coldspring Lane?" Or whatever street they live on. Then, try to arrange a place to have lunch to catch up on old times. Me and a friend did this prank once and it turned out that the lady we picked actually knew a lady named Lisa Meyers. We got to the point where we were arranging a place to eat lunch when she realized that she had the wrong Lisa Meyers.

USING PEOPLE'S NAMES TO MESS WITH THEM
[The Poor Residence]
Me: Hi is Mr. Poor there?
Mrs. Poor: No he's not, could I take a message?
Me: Nah, I was just wondering if he was poor like his name said.
Mrs. Poor: ... You know what buddy, you can kiss my @$$!

(The Next Day)
Me: Hi is Mr. Poor available?
Mrs. Poor: No, can I take a message?\
Me: No, I was just wondering if he was poor like his name says.
Mrs. Poor: Alright you little motherf#cker, you look up this address and come see this house and you'll find out how poor we are!

(The day after that)
Me: Hi is Mr. Poor available?
Mr. Poor: Speaking.
Me: Hi, I was just wondering if you were poor like your name said.
Mr. Poor: No... You need to stop callin' here, okay?
Me: No.

[The Cook Residence]
Me: Hi is there a Cook available?
Miss Cook: Speaking.
Me: Good cus I'm starving!

[The Culpepper Residence]
Me: Hi is this the Culpepper residence?
Mrs. Culpepper: Yes.
Me: Well then can I talk to Dante?
Mrs. Culpepper: F#ck you.



SOME OTHER IDEAS:
[Hi, can I talk to Jeremy?]
This prank works best if you cna disguise your voice or you have a lot of people with you. Call a random number and ask for Jeremy. The person there will tell you that you have the wrong number. Wait a few minutes and have a different person call back and ask for Jeremy. Repeat this process until they get really pissed off. Finally, have somebody call them and say "Hi, this is Jeremy. I was expecting to get a lot of calls today but I realized that I accidently gave my friends this number." Their reaction will be hilarious.

[Information]
This is a pretty simple prank. But anyway, call 411 and ask how to get to Sesame street. I think calling information is free if you call from a landline but when I dial 411 on my cell phone I get charged $1.49 every time, so be careful!

[Bob from the Bubble factory]
This is a good prank if you want to annoy somebody. call them up and say "Hi! I'm Bob from the Bubble Factory, and I saw bubbles and bubbles and bubbles and bubbles and bubbles..." Until they hang up. Then, call back and as it's ringing say, "and bubbles and bubbles and bubbles and bubbles and bubbles..." so when they answer they will hear it from the start. Repeat until you are satisfied.



[An Old Classic Redone]
Call somebody and say "Hi! Is your refidgerator running?" They might laugh and think 'Oh I know this one.' So they will say "No." When they say 'no,' say to them "Oh, well this is Sears Home Repair Service, we'll be right over!"



[Random Baby Prank]
Another simple prank that can produce hilarious results. Call somebody and ask them how babies are made. I know how simple it is, but I've gotten some hilarious reactions out of people with these.

Prank call someone and when they answer just start yelling ME CASA ES FUEGO ! ME CASA ES FUEGO!
added by melikhan
added by TDIlover226
Source: Various websites
added by shiriny
added by OuroborosSnyder
added by angel_cake
added by TwilighterSabby
Source: http://icanhascheezburger.com/page/2/
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Over the years we will run into people that are complete imbecules. Sometimes they say completely stupid things, and act like they're smart. This is the 10 most dumbest things people have ever said to me

10. "If you keep telling me about your stories I won't read them."

This was posted on my fanpop wall by Pinkmare. She wanted to know about my latest fanfics, and I decided to post on her wall letting her know what I was up to. She thought I was rushing her, even though I just told her about the story. I didn't even say "Read this immediately."

9. "Do you want some beer?"

I was walking down the...
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posted by purplefreak855
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”
― Marilyn Monroe

“This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll...
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posted by joe-kerr
Hey everyone.
I'm back with another list. And this time, I do know who to credit. All these quotes are from George W. Bush. For real. I found them online on various media sites. The ranking, however, is my own.

20    "They misunderestimated me."
     —Bentonville, Arkansas; November 6, 2000
    
19    "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter."
     —In parting words to world leaders at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as those present looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan,...
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posted by bizeshnakarki
I got it somewhere n thought i should share it.

101 Ways To Annoy People
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all...
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posted by mehere
top 24 eminem song (random order)




who knew

rock bottom

words are weapons

lighters

criminal

kill you

never 2 far

like toy solidiers

white america

cleanin' out my closet

my name is

till i collapse

when im gone

sing for the moment

the real slim shady

just dont give a fuck

lose yourself

the way i am

mockingbird

infinite

stan

not afraid

without me

just lose it

i hope you like this one better than the first one please leave a comment if u like od dont like it i want to hear your thoughts :P
previously on The Evil Teddy Bear: Tina saw a Cute looking Teddy bear and picked up from the self but when she put on the counter to buy it the sales man straight away took it off of the counter and said it wasnt for sale but then Jenni had an awesome idea and managed to get the Teddy bear the sales man gave the girls the Teddy bear for free but after they left and while they were walking the Teddy bear evil chuckled and its eyes turned red...

Tina unlocked the door to their house (forgot to mention that their also sisters)and they all walked in Peter put the Teddy bear ontop of the book case...
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1. People are more likely to tilt their heads to the right when kissing instead of the left (65 percent of people go to the right!).

2.The oldest known love song was written 4,000 years ago and comes from an area between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers.

3.One in five long-term love relationships began with one or both partners being involved with others.

4.Falling in love can induce a calming effect on the body and mind and raises levels of nerve growth factor for about a year, which helps to restore the nervous system and improves the lover’s memory.

5.Love can also exert the same stress on...
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Cheryl Cole and Nicola Roberts.
Cheryl Cole and Nicola Roberts.
Not that anyone's interested, but here are my current top 11 female 'celebrities'.



1. Cheryl Cole. (yeah, I didn't think you'd be surprised.)
-Words just can't describe how much I love this woman. If I try to then I'll take up this entire article.

2. Amy Lee.
- She has the most stunning voice, and she's absolutely beautiful; Evanescence wouldn't have ever been Evanescence without her. She's amazing.

3. Avril Lavigne.
- I'm a big fan of her music. She's cool, she's cute, and with all this, she has amazing hair. :3

4. Hayley Williams.
- She also has amazing hair, like all the people on this list actually....
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posted by TruBerries
**Before I begin, I would like to say that I'm writing this out of experience so y'all don't be thinking that I'm guessing, putting other people down who did or are doing this, or that I'm being absolutely rude about it, which I'm not.**

In everyone's life, we all want someone that we want to have, hold, and love and never having that feeling of ever being alone for the rest of our lives. We all know that it takes time and patience, but the thing about it is that there's people out there that jump head first into generating a relationship out of thin air with someone he/she has just met online....
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posted by Bella_Dhampir
1. "Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."

2. "If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?"

3. "People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world," (Calvin - Calvin and Hobbes)

4. "There are only two things a child will share willingly -- communicable diseases and his mother's age. " (Benjamin Spock)

5. "Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman." (Kathy Lette)

6. ""Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!" (Homer Simspon)...
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posted by invadercalliope
Hello i'm InvaderCalliope!
Emo Poems:
Poem number 1:
My tears are a sign of my fears,I've been drowning all these years.
I have to break out from this pain,Have to free me from this chain.
My heart is filling up inside,I cannot run,I cannot hide.
Hate is filling up my mind,Its love i cannot find.
Poem number 2:
My friends call me emo.
My mom makes jokes.
My sisters are worried.
I'm not emo i say.
Stop making jokes.
They're not very funny.
No need to worry.
I promise i'll tell.
The End
1-TIK TOK-Ke$ha
2-NEED YOU NOW-Lady Antebellum
3-HEY, SOUL SISTER-Train
4-CALIFORNIA GURLS-Katy Perry Featuring Snoop Dogg
5-OMG-Usher Featuring will.i.am
6-AIRPLANES-B.o.B Featuring Hayley Williams
7-LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE-Eminem Featuring Rihanna
8-BAD ROMANCE-Lady Gaga
9-DYNAMITE-Taio Cruz
10-BREAK YOUR HEART-Taio Cruz Featuring Ludacris
11-NOTHIN' ON YOU-B.o.B Featuring Bruno Mars
12-I LIKE IT-Enrique Iglesias Featuring Pitbull
13-BEDROCK-Young Money Featuring Lloyd
14-IN MY HEAD-Jason Derulo
15-RUDE BOY-Rihanna
16-TELEPHONE-Lady Gaga Featuring Beyonce
17-TEENAGE DREAM-Katy Perry
18-JUST THE WAY YOU ARE-Bruno...
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NOTE EVERYONE I DID NOT MAKE THIS!!





* People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know where my watch is pal, where the f*ck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?


* People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.


* When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*cking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?


* When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the f*ck would you keep...
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