Rules that guys wished girls knew..........
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like
every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and
your Dad probably is too.
17. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
18. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
19. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from
point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
21. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz
together.
29. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an
argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
30. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
33. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done- not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
37. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like
you do.
39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are
airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's
certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first two months we were going out.
41. Anyone can buy condoms.
If this offended any Girls throughout this‚ i'm sorry... but us girls should know this
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if he can find the perfect present, again!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's just like
every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex-boyfriend is an idiot and
your Dad probably is too.
17. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
18. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
19. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from
point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes-what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
21. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz
together.
29. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an
argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
30. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
33. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done- not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
37. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like
you do.
39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are
airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's
certainly not going to deter us from reading the magazines.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first two months we were going out.
41. Anyone can buy condoms.
If this offended any Girls throughout this‚ i'm sorry... but us girls should know this
Once I was reading online... It said that people with brown eyes are.. are.. ZOMBIES! I got really scared so I turned to my friend but SHE had brown eyes. " Ahhhh! ZOMBIEEE!!!" I ran outside. I looked back and she had followed me. "AHHH!" I turned around and WALKED into a pizza shop like nothing had happened. I was at the counter ordering the pizza when I heard the door open and a low voice saying," PIIZZZAAA!!!" I turned around and yelled," AAAHHH ZOMBIE IN DA HOUSSEE! EVERYONE HIDE YO KID! HIDE YO WIFE! HIDE YO HUSBAND AND GET OUTTA HERE!" I sat down and ate pizza. Om nom nom. She came up to me and said," PIZZZAAA" I turned and looked at her and yelled," AHHH ZOMBIE DONT STEAL MY PIZZA." I grabbed my pizza and ran out the door. I saw a hobo and threw it on its head. She came outside and said," HOOOOBOOO" and ran after it. I said," FINALLY FREE!" I jumped in the lake and said," yaayy!1! LAke! Make me a sammich!"
Do you ever hate it when its 11:30 on a school night and you cant go to sleep?
Do you ever hate the guy who invented clocks cause it seems to go faster than its supposed to?
Do you ever hate everything around you?
Do you ever hate big-deal award shows that come on late so that you end up being wide awake at 12, 1 o'clock in the morning?
Do you ever hate waking up too dagum early for school?
sorry. im just really mad right now. i hate all of these things. at the moment.
Do you ever hate the guy who invented clocks cause it seems to go faster than its supposed to?
Do you ever hate everything around you?
Do you ever hate big-deal award shows that come on late so that you end up being wide awake at 12, 1 o'clock in the morning?
Do you ever hate waking up too dagum early for school?
sorry. im just really mad right now. i hate all of these things. at the moment.