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posted by e2mma2weasle3
100 ways to annoy the Cullen’s.

1.) Take Jasper to an African American Support center and tell everyone there his full name.

2.) Talk in a really bad Texas ancient when around Jasper.

3.) Tell Carlisle that Esme has been having an affair with Aro Volturi

4.) Dangle Alice's favorite pair of shoes over your head when you are standing on the opposite side of the boundary line.

5.) Fill Edward's iPod with rap songs

6.) Fill Emmett’s with classical

7.) Tell Alice that Jasper looks at porn

8.) Pay ten guys to look at Rosalie and go "Ewe"

9.) Spray paint Edward's car pink

10.) Tell him it was Alice's idea

11.) Then when he gets mad tell him that Bella likes it, just to calm him down

12.) Then suggest anger management classes

13.) Tell Jasper he should be a therapist

14.) Tell anyone of the Cullen’s that they should go to a tanning salon

15.) Tell Rosalie that Alice is pregnant

16.) Tell her that it was Emmett who did it

17.) Tell Jasper the same thing

18.) Video tape the fight

19.) Then play it back for Carlisle

20.) Fill Edward's closet with team Jacob shirts

21.) Ask Edward "Gee, I haven't seen Mike Newton lately; bella would probably know where he is right?"

22.) Break all the mirrors in Rosalie’s room.

23.) Tell her that her face did it

24.) Suggest that she get a makeover to prevent it from happening again

25.) Sign Jasper up to run the school's blood drive

26.) Call Jasper the walking talking "chill pill"

27.) Say to Emmett "wow, you really let yourself go, have you considered working out?"

28.) When ever Edwards too busy to help you with something say "Oh that's ok, I'm sure Jacob or mike could help."

29.) Say to Edward "hey Edward my car's broken, I was wondering if you've seen Rosalie around so she could fix it."

30.) Then when he offers to do it start laughing hysterically.

31.) Then say "Oh that's ok I'll just ask Jacob."

32.) Tell Rosalie that Leah is prettier than her

33.) Subscribe Esme for parenting magazines.

34.) Then tell her that they were actually meant for Edward

35.) Tell him that you'd feel much better for Renessmee if he also took some classes

36.) When he refuses tell him "Well fine! If you don't care about your daughter's safety!"

37.) Die Renessmee's hair blonde

38.) Then have her start crying and screaming "Now daddy won't like me!" right in front of Edward

39.) Sell Edward's piano

40.) Then tell him it's time he buckled down and started saving up for Renessmee's college fund

41.) Deflate all of Edward's car tires at school

42.) Then hide the knife you used to do it in Jasper's locker

43.) Tell everyone in history class the Jasper isn't a descendent of Jasper Whitlock but that he is Jasper Whitlock

44.) Tell them that he's here to kill everyone in the school

45.) And if they don't believe you show them the knife in his locker

46.) Or if you don't want to be that harsh; In the middle of History class when learning about the Confederate army, point to the picture of Jasper in the book and shout "Hey Jasper! That looks just like you!"

47.) Tell every girl at school that Edward broke up with Bella

48.) Then give out Bella's phone number to them

49.) Then laugh when she starts to scream at him about all the girls calling her asking for Edward

50.) Do the same thing for Emmett and Rosalie

51.) Then Jasper and Alice

52.) Then when all the guys accuse you of it, innocently claim "I was only trying to give you guys more variety"

53.) Then let them know you’re available

54.) When they get even more upset sate; "Well you don't want to be stuck with the same girl for the rest of your lif-, Oh, yea, sorry..."

55.) Visit the hospital and try to get Carlisle to go insane; by using a fan to blow the scent of the blood in his face.

56.) Or better yet, splash some of the patient’s blood in his face.

57.) Then when he asks what you’re doing tell him that he looked thirsty

58.) Tell Edward that he's a show off

59.) Ask Edward if he can fly

60.) Tell any one of the Cullen’s that you’re being a vampire for Halloween

61.) Then ask them where they bought their costumes

62.) Replace all the blood in their house with red cool-aid

63.) Take pictures of their reactions when they drink it.

64.) Trade Edward's car for a mini-van

65.) Then make comments like "Can I get a ride to school soccer mom?"

66.) Put one of Bella's bra's in Emmett's coat pocket

67.) Then think "Hey what's that doing in there?" When in front of Edward

68.) Say things to Edward like "Hey Bella looks cold, want me to call Jacob?"

69.) Clean all of the stuff out of every Cullen's room and throw it over the boundary line

70.) Tell everyone at school that the Cullen guys are actually girls

71.) Then prove it by showing them how they don't even flinch when you kick them in the balls

72.) Then do the same things for Carlisle at the hospital

73.) Order tombstones for every single Cullen

74.) When they ask why tell them you provoked the Volturi and blamed it on them

75.) Then actually do it

76.) Ask Jasper if he could be your square dancing partner

77.) Constantly remind the Cullen’s that if they die they're going to hell

78.) Then remind them about 74

79.) Send Edward love letters from Jane

80.) Smash Edward's CD collection

81.) Then when he asks why tell him there was a spider

82.) Say things to Jasper like "Wow, for someone who can control emotions, you really don't have any."

83.) Say stuff to Rosalie like "Ewe! What's that on your face?"

84.) Buy Alice a crystal ball

85.) Put black hair dye in Rosalie’s shampoo

86.) Then tell Bella that Edward likes it

87.) Constantly remind Alice that she might not actually be in love with Jasper

88.) Spill blood on their floor

89.) Then laugh when Jasper starts to lick it up

90.) Sing in your head “I know a song that gets on Edward’s every nerve!” When around Edward

91.) Steal each and everyone ones of their credit/debit cards and max them out

92.) Say to Jasper that you told Carlisle about your depression problems and that he told you to talk to Jasper about it

93.) Change your mind about something 50,000 times so Alice gets confused

94.) Buy Edward a puppy

95.) Suggest that he name it Jacob

96.) Tell Edward that his body glitter is fading

97.) Laugh anytime Edward says something corny (I don’t think anything he says is corny.)

98.) Constantly tell Edward that he’s is going to end up killing Bella

99.) Then laugh when he says that he won’t

And if you really want to piss them off…

100.) Have them pick a day where they all circle up and talk about their “problems.”
posted by decullen
I could see a bright light.I opened my my eyes.Everyone was there.When I say everyone I mean Then Cullen's all the wolfs and Charlie.What was happened.My head was killing me.I was looking around but I couldn't see her. Where's my baby.

"Where's my baby?"I asked them all."Where am I?"

"Bella,when you got hit my Victoria,she took her.Your in the hospital.You`ve been unconscious for two days."Edward said.I gasped.She has my baby.Tears were rolling down my face.Everyone was staring at be.

"Why her?Why not me?I want my baby?I want my baby safe in my arms not in that horrible little fats arms"I screamed.Edward...
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posted by a-jforever
Heres part two. Hope you like it.

I fell over, catching my hand on something sharp. I knew I was being sort of silly, but they weren’t going to let me see Jacob! I pulled my knees to my chest burying my face on them. This wasn’t fair.

Pretty soon it began to get cold and dark. I wondered if I should be heading home or if they were just going to leave me out here. I didn’t want to talk to dad anyway. I heard a low whining in my left ear and a wet nose brush across my cheek. I looked into his big black eyes.
“What?” I asked.
He whined again. I buried my head back onto my knees. He curled...
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posted by CarlislesLover
Hi guys this is part 3 of conversation EPOV at last!!!!



I was dragged off by Alice and Emmett. “Where do you think you’re taking me” I growled at them pulling away. “You’re going hunting” Alice replied “I don’t think so!” Emmett had his hands around my arm really tightly so I couldn’t go anywhere. “EMMETT LET GO” I shouted at him. “Edward you nearly just killed Bella. We have to take you hunting” Alice said softly “WELL FOR YOUR INFORMATION MY FIANCE JUST GOT THROWN THROUGH A WINDOW BY YOU HUSBAND!” Alice just looked at me. If she could cry right now I bet she...
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posted by whatupiloveyou
3 months, 2 days, 11 hours, 49 minutes, 17 seconds. That is how long I have been away from my ... Not mine anymore, Bella. She looked so sad when I left her in the forest.
Edward, I mentally screamed, stop thinking about her. She is better without you!
It's about 10 pm. I wish I was human so I could sleep away the pain. Up in the sky a shooting star, I used to think those were Earth's little miracles, that was until Blla came into my life. She was my miracle, I knew it was stupid but I closed my eyes and whispered, "I wish I could do the right thing with Bella."
That was stupid, I scolded...
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Top Box-Office Teens

Forbes - March 12, 2010 9:18 PM PS

Daniel Radcliffe was just 11 years old when he played Harry Potter for the first time in 2001's "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone." It was the young actor's first major role, and for better or worse, it has come to define him. When the series ends in a few years, it will be difficult to see Radcliffe as anything but a grown-up Potter.


He's making grown-up money for the last two installments of Warner Bros.' huge franchise: $20 million per film. The studio was happy to pay him -- the "Harry Potter" films have earned a total $4.3 billion...
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posted by kiwi12
sorry it took so long

Alice

I couldn't believe it. I hadn't expected him to reject me. He had seemed to like me. I knew I loved him. I had loved him since I first saw him, though I had been a bit reluctant to admit it. I'd seen a vision of him down on one knee with a silver ring in a beautiful box. I knew I wasn't mistaken in what I saw. I couldn't believe I'd ruined everything. I was always so bold and outgoing. I liked being extroverted, but it wasn't worth losing Jasper over. Nothing was worth losing Jasper over. I looked into his eyes.

Then, I experienced something new. I cried. Vampire style....
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posted by kiwi12
part 18

I was going to talk to Carlisle, but he was talking with the humans. I decided to talk with Edward. Despite Bella being the room, it was fairly simple to get Edward's attention with my thoughts. He walked up to me and knelt by the couch I was on. "I should leave now... I just realized: What if I phase?" He didn't seem disturbed "We've already addressed the issue. Weren't you told?" He paused a moment and tuned into several people's thoughts "Ah- there was a misscommunication as to who was going to talk with you. I apologize. Jasper has a pretty good idea of how upset the wolves have...
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posted by IsabellaMCullen
Painful Memories


Chapter Six



Bella POV

Edward hasn't left my side since Hayley and her 'friends' arrived. Her 'friends' still have yet to come and meet us. She must be the leader or spokeswoman of the group.

“Yes, I am. Those two couldn't lead anything, and I'm the one with powers.” Hayley's high pitched voice answered my thoughts.

We were now all sitting in the living room. Carsile and Esme sat together on the love seat. Jasper sat on the other end of the couch from Hayley, with Alice on his lap. Edward and I sat on the bottom of the Cullens curved staircase. Edward had his arm molded around...
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posted by She_wolf
Embry quote
Embry quote
Chapter three (hope you all like it)

“Oh hi Embry.” The beautiful vampire Bella said in her sickly sweet voice. “Sorry to bother you but have you seen Jake anywhere?” She looked dead worried. I chuckled at the joke.
“Nope, sorry. Why don’t you go to Billy’s?” I leant on the door frame.
“I did. Billy said he’d gone out somewhere.” She sighed “Maybe he’s just mad at me at the moment and ignoring me on purpose.” She looked upset.
I felt really awkward. “Do you want to come in? Maybe I can help.” I doubted that I could.
I showed her to the living room, and she...
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posted by She_wolf
Chapter two (enjoy!)

My mom was waiting to pounce when I got in the door.
“Have you been out with the Clearwater’s again?” She snapped as soon as I was in the door. I mentally noted the open bottle of Vodka on the kitchen table and the glass next to it.
“Yeah. Sorry mom.” I said automatically. That was nearly all I said to her these days.
She tutted loudly “I hope you and Leah aren’t too serious.” I stared at her in shock. It felt like a cold shower.
“Me and… Leah?” I blushed more deeply than normal, out of disgust. “Err mom me and Seth and Leah Clearwater are just...
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The second day of school wasn't so bad, the best part for me was Edward was absent today. Bella was okay with it only she looked suspicous, like 'what happend to him' because of what happend yesterday. In Biology I asked the teacher to sit next to Bella because Mike was absent as well. Bella and I did some kind of experiment which was pretty easy, and got A+'s for both of us. In gym we played volley-ball, which sport Bella did not fit in, so I helped her through all of it. While we were going through the parking lot, the Cullen's (without Edward) staring at us. When Bella got to her car she...
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posted by SuperFunFan1001
okie dokie people! I've decided to just go ahead and start on this story. I really hope you like it. I know that this chapter is short but it is just a taste of what you will get later on. Give it a chance please.

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY OF STEPHANIE MEYER'S CHARACTERS. (Bella, Edward, Alice....)

Bella's POV

BANG! BANG! BANG!
I woke with a start and fell off my bed landing right on my backside.
Who the heck could be at my door this early in the morning?
I looked over at my clock. 12:36pm
Oh, oops. Charlie must have left already. Good thing it's a saturday so I don't have school.
BANG! BANG!...
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posted by Sarah234
“Bella, at last we finally meet” the figure speaks her voice flawless and for some unseen reason familiar. “I don’t want to be here too long so ill make this brief,” they continue.
“Tanya” I whisper, as everything finally click into place, her voice from the phone call, its defiantly her.
“yes Bella, anyway I'm here to tell you to leave Edward alone, he’s moved on and your silly little phone calls are becoming irritating” she explains, her face becomes clearer as my eyes adjust to the light. She is unimaginably beautiful, with perfect features that models envy.
“Moved on?”...
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posted by w33bs99
Imagine you were a character in the Twilight saga. Who would you want to be or if you amd up a character what would ur name be and would you be a werewolf, vampire, or human? Would you be part of the Cullen family. Or world you be part of the wolf pack? If your a character who are you? Why? If I was a cahracter in the Twilight saga I would be a made up cahracter named Chrisy. I world be Jacobs girlfreind. I would be a vampire like Renesmee. she is a vampire but she likes Jacob and Jacob likes her. I would be Chrisy becasue Jacob is HOT!! I think anyone would be lucky to date him. Think of this...
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posted by Twilight597
a/n okay, i havent posted in a while, but prolly the next 3 chapters are done...so the first person to comment, i'll put the next one up! this ones kinda long...so
~Daniella

last chapter

Victoria POV

When I finished cleaning, I walked downstairs to get Becky. She was still out cold, so I picked her up and put her on my back, her arms around my neck and me holding her knees.

James found a big venomous coven that he wanted to take out. You see, her doesn’t believe that there should be more than one kind of vampire, so he plans to take out as many other vampires as he can.

I closed the door behind...
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This is a Fanfic I'm working on, called When Worlds Collide. I'm posting the link, hoping everybody will give it a chance.
It has over 10,000 views and almost 300 reviews so far!
In my story, Edward is a smart over achiever, Emmett is in jail, and Bella is a mysterious next door neighbor with some issues.
Edward has to decide if he's going to risk everything for Bella, or if he's going to continue to please everybody around him and forget about her.
It's E/B AU-AH with heavy drama. I hope you take a look at at!!

LINK---> link
posted by anna0789
im back finally exams are ovver yay !!!! ok now here it is...

bellas pov

the next morning alice had also pick an outfit for me i didn't say anything becuase i knew i couldn't beat alice's puppy eyes
i was still worried about edward when i enter the class room i gasp
edward was making out with some girl ontop of the teachers desk.it was pretty disgusting so i clear my throut

the girl ignore me and continue to kiss edward's neck but edward look at me and smirk
"what are you jelouse Swan?" i was shook what was wrong with him
i scoff " yeah you wish Cullen" i turn around to leave and i heard him...
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posted by House_Of_Night_
*************************************************
Awww thanks everyone! my 1st chapter was a sucess! "Phew" *brushes hand over forehead* lols. hope you enjoy. Next chapter should be out in four days time. i try to publish every four days! Add me, if ya want. Now enjoy! =]**************************************************






…New Beginning…
The sun was beaming down on my face. I groaned, my body felt stiff and sore. I opened my eyes slowly. I could hear Bella, Edward and Jacob talking, well more shouting.
“Jacob black, if you have upset my daughter-” Dad said in an angry voice.
Jacob interrupted....
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posted by fanpire39
for those who have reead my fanfiction you know that i have't wrote for awhie that's because i'm stuck and i have no good ideas' so if you would like to help me with my brain freeze send your idea's to my inbox and then i'll write more if you have'nt read my story please read then if you have ideas send them to me as well. o

Thanks!! fanpire39
the computer said it was to short so I'm gonna tpye a buch of random stuff.mlikejgoisjfv oisjdvoidjbounvlnsoiv jejkfvndofijgejrgoiffjflkweefoisufjn3roi9isoigjqeprigpeofjblkefnjoiejfgklenglkisjblenojboirngoidvbjenfbdnbednbaoeffboierngoifjboaenfbofdbuaefnhboidnbjnbuhdnfkjbnaifbjlafbnmolimilkey wainhbchjvnbhvfnhfjdjsmcjvjcvikvjijiviovvfirnvnr8cnuhe7ccejuvcrbbvwwhfvwbhbyvwbvqiebbh ibjhwrbkhcivubriuhuhsfgbeiybsdkjfbsiuvhswjbkjbkjxvb fuxkjv bvhohgiuefknvkjewrngfikuhvrnscn usffhrgi7hvlwrnoihfurwjkcbdvkjfbvugnbeuihu4buf
posted by twilight_james
Chapter 8

As soon as Aro heard my words, he sprung. But he didn’t land on my back; he was far too cunning for that. No, he landed on Jane’s back, his teeth just millimetres from her throat. “What if I killed Jane” he hissed ‘Would you join us seconds before the final blow was delivered?””
Jane shot me a frightened, pleading look. It killed me to see her like this, but it killed me more to say the word
“No”
Aro laughed. “Oh, you know me too well. I’d never kill Jane. No, I have far better plans than that” He laughed again “Jane, you know what to do” Aro turned back to...
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