Told you so. Alice thought in an incrediblly immature tone. My visions are not wrong... her thought faded out in the middle. Well, sometimes I misinterpret, but that was only because of those stupid DOGS. she rushed to defend her visions, though I had not spoken. She was sitting next to me on the front porch step. I turned to glare at her.
"And what if I had been right?" I shot back at her. "What if Bella had lost her soul? You think I would be okay with that? Of course I would have stayed with her, but it would not have been right to trade her soul for my happiness." I scolded her. She seemed to think everything was fine. She rolled her eyes at me.
You are SO dramatic. You really think I would have risked her soul? she thought rhetorically. She continued before I could answer. I knew that it would all end this way. You know that. You saw the vision I had the day you saved Bella from the van. I could tell she had a soul, just as I can tell you do. And besides, you have everything you want now. You love her, she loves you. You have eternity to be together. What more could you want? You need to stop being to pesamistic. She was right. I was being stuborn. She loved Bella, too. Not as much as I did, not by a long shot, but she did love her very much. I sighed.
"You're right, Alice." I gave in.
"Of course I am." she said confidently. She would have been shocked, but of course she had seen a vision as she was speaking. Which was why I did not bothered fighting her, seeing myself say this and realizing that she was right. I sighed again. She was swept away by her vision. Bella pacing. Trying not to listen to our conversation from upsatirs, but of course her hearing was too acute to tune us out. Getting frustrated that the conversation was so one-sided due to Alice only thinking these things. I laughed out-loud. The vision continued, to a few minutes later. I walk up the stairs to meet her. I embrace her, kiss her. Alice's vision stops. That was as far as I had planned. After holding Bella again, I would deside then what we would do next. I waned to know everything, and just thinking about all those questions had Alice's visions flickering like mad. I laughed again, and she glared at me.
"Stop that." she said seriously. I hate not being able to see. I HATE when he does that. I pressed my lips into a tight line to keep from laughing. Her eyes narrowed further. My smile became smaller, but still there. It still felt odd.
"Thank you, Alice." I said with feeling. "I can never thank you enough." I could not. She had given me the greatest thing in the universe. She rolled her eyes. She laughed lightly, and said, "Your welcome, you knuckle-head." She wrapped her tiny arms around me. I embraced her warmly. I could never repay her, but I would do anything to try. She pulled away.
"Oh, go on! You can't make a desion on what you're going to do and it's driving me insane," she laughed. "Just go already, I know you're dying to," she flashed a coy smile. I smiled and disappeared up the stairs. Bella was waiting at the door, having just heard out goodbyes. She met me as soon as I opened the door, slamming into me too hard. As usual. I laughed, loosening her grip. She-luckily-loosened her grip on me slightly, but keeping her hands where they were, on my shoulders. She reached up on her tiptoes to kiss me. She could not reach all the way, and her face became irritated in the split second it took me to lean down and meet her lips. I was so relieved to have her to myself. My family had left to go hunting. They tried to be inconspicuous, but even if I could not read their minds, I would have known what they were up to. It was quite a bit more resent than they needed to go. And all of them for some reason needed to go right then. Right. Rosalie's mind was rather irritating. She had made no progress with Bella, and I knew it effected Bella. We could get a house of our own soon. The thought made me very happy. Of course I would see my family, but I wanted my own life, too. All of thos only took a moment of thought, and I disregarded it. It did not matter right now. I had Bella to myself, and she was out of control. As usual. My smile widened. It was such a relief. It did not matter how out of control she let hersefl be with me. I would not hurt her, even if I tried. The thought of trying to hurt her made me cringe internally, but I let myself feel relief that I could not hurt her. Not phisically at least....Phisically...Again, I thought back to that conversation we had had so long ago. I pulled away from her lips, kissing her lightly on her forhead before walking and sitting on the bed. She did not have to sleep. We had all the time in the world. The thoguht made me ecstatic. She smiled at me. It was the most beautiful sight in the world. It was completely dark in the room. Of course we had no need for light. We could see every detail perfectly. She sat next to me, but buried her face in my chest as soon as we sat down. I stroked her hair and leaned over to place me head on hers. I thought about last year. September 16th would forever be the worst day of my existance. The day I left Bella. The day I made the worst mistake of my life. I shook away the thought, thinking of my happiest memory. It was hard to deside. Every moment with her felt like my best moment. I suddenly wondered what she was thinking. I wondered if she were thinking the same thing. Was she wondering what I was thinking? Either way, I had to know.
"What are you thinking?" I said a bit more urgently than I had intended. Her body shook with her silent laughter. She lied back on the bed, pulling my with her. She turned to face me.
"The future." she said, vague as always. My curiousity was on fire. I needed details. What did she see for the future? What was she planning?
"Such as?" I asked, controlling the curiousity in my voice better. She smirked.
"Lots of things." she said, vague again. I was about to press for more, but she continued. "Like...What will we be doing? Where will we go?...Will Rosalie ever get used to me?" she frowned as she said the last question. As did I. I stroked her cheek.
"Don't worry, love." I said soothingly. "She is a good person deep down, she just like to hide it." It worked. She smiled again. My expression mirrored hers. Her mood effected me more than anything. Her smile faded, but not out of sadness. She looked...embarassed? She looked away from my eyes, and if she could have blushed, I was sure she would have. I had to ask.
"What?" I demanded, too curious. She shook her head, still looking at the ceiling. I sat up on my elbow, leaning over her, our faces an inch apart.
"You have to tell me now." I stated. She met my gaze, still embarassed. She bit her lip, and furrowed her brow. Her face relaxed, and she wrapped her arms around me. She was trying to distract me. It was working. Slightly. But her secret thoughts still had the front of my mind. I pressed my lips lightly to hers, but pulled away when she tried to make it last. I would not be distracted. I smirked at her, letting her know I had not forgotten. She pursed her lips, and sighed. She said nothing.
"Well?" I pressed quietly, trying to be patient.
"I was just thinking...about...last year..." She was? We were on the same page? That was a first. I smiled wider. Her eyes narrowed slightly, but she continued, looking away from me again-blocking my view to her thoughts and maddening me further.
"You remember how differant it used to be? We used to not be able to do any of this...you had to hold back." There was a meaning in her words that evaded me. I lifted the arm I was not leaning on, and turned her face to me. Her eyes were full of meaning. Her thoughts were remarkablly close to my own, but surely...With a start, I realized that we were on exactly the same page. Her embarassment...how I had not been able to hold her like this before...But now I could. Could she really be thinking that? No, she was still a newbron. It could not be. I must just be seeing and hearing what I wanted to. But she added, "You couldn't touch me like this..." quiet as a breath, and my suspicians grew.
"What do you mean?" I leaned back, looking at her with both out head on the pillow. She turned on her side, facing me. She thought her answer through carefully. I took a few moments, and I tried to stay patient. She was going to answer.
"Well...I mean...I'm not so soft and fragile...You don't have to mind your actions every moment that we're together so you won't hurt me..." This sounded very formiluar. "You don't have to worry about being too hasty...reaching out and meaning to touch my face, and crush my skull by mistake..." Very, very formiluar. She was quoting me.
"Because it would be too hard for you, if I were that...close?"
"That's certainly a problem. But that's not what I was thinking of. It's just that you're so soft, so fragile. I have to mind my actions every moment that we're together so that I don't hurt you. I could kill you quite easily, Bella, simply by accident. If I was too hasty...if for one second I wasn't paying enough attention, I could reach out, meaning to touch your face, and crush your skull by mistake. You don't realize how incrediblybreakable you are. I can never, never afford to lose any kind of control when I'm with you."
"I'm not so incredibly breakable..." she continued, incase I did not get it. "You can afford to lose control with me." her voice grew even quieter, I could barely hear it. I was unable to move. My face was frozen in whatever expression it had been before. She...was...She actually wanted...that?