The rain had finally stopped and grey watery dawn was just starting to paint the sky above. Zero stumbled and ended up on his knees, half fallen, half collapsed. Yuki slid off his back, stroking his shoulder and hair softly with numb, freezing fingers. He'd been carrying her off and on all night. She walked a good part of it on her own, but her injured feet had increasingly refused to support her and Zero had carried her more and more, despite how she knew it was wearing him out.
Zero rested his hands against the wet ground, letting his head hang for a moment. His back and shoulder muscles were on fire from carrying Yuki so long over such rough terrain. He'd not slept in over 48 hours now and he was exhausted. Trying to both take care of Yuki and Kaname – especially trying to take care of Kuran without looking like he was trying to take care of him – had taken their toll on the ex-human and he was hitting the end of his strength.
Kaname sank silently down to sit by a tree a few feet away, tipping his head back to rest against it as he breathed slowly and raggedly through his teeth. This night had been one long, unending hell. Sheer stubbornness had kept him moving, but it wasn't going to be enough much longer. His gaze held on Kiriyu for a moment as Zero rested, exhausted, on hands and knees. The boy had done well, and Kaname wasn't above silently admitting it. Zero had shouldered the heaviest end of the burden of their escape and continued trying to take care of everyone even as his own strength failed.
Kaname almost hated to mention that they were lost.
As the sun came up, it was obviously rising to their right, which meant they weren't heading towards the road, at least not by the short route. If they had been, they'd have been there by now, or at the very least near enough to hear passing cars. But there were no such sounds anywhere near, even to his sharp hearing - only the rustling drip of the wet forest and the chirp of the wakening birds. The Ichijos liked their privacy. The estate was situated far out in the country and there were miles upon miles of trackless woodlands surrounding it. Obviously, they had ended up forging deeper into them, rather than out. Kaname's sense of direction was usually impeccable, but he had to admit he had no idea where they were. He'd been in too much pain to keep track of direction or do anything other than simply keep following Zero's bobbing back through the long trek last night, struggling to put one foot in front of the other.
Zero finally rolled onto his side and sat back up, glancing somewhat accusingly towards the rising sun. Apparently he'd figured it out for himself.
Yuki blew on her cold hands, shivering underneath Zero's still sopping coat. She was probably the only one of them who was truly glad to see the sun rising. "Where are we?" she asked, looking around. She had been brought here unconscious and had very little idea where they'd escaped from or where they were going to.
Zero rubbed his neck with a sigh, feeling utterly disgusted with himself. "Lost," he said quietly. He didn't know how he'd gotten turned around last night, but with the storm and the danger and the unfamiliar landscape he'd had so many things to be keeping track of that it wasn't that surprising really.
Zero cast glance towards Kaname, either expecting, or daring the vampire to make a crack, but Kaname wasn't in the mood to be taking jabs, he was feeling far too poorly and had closed his eyes, resting expressionless against the tree behind him.
"If we bear east," Zero continued after a moment, nodding towards the rising sun. "We should be able to find the road again sooner or later. I'm sorry."
Yuki simply nodded, giving no indication of the deep inner groan that the thought of more walking brought to her. "It's not your fault, Zero, everything was really confusing last night," she tried to comfort.
"Actually, it's not a bad thing that we did not take the shortest route," Kaname added unexpectedly, eyes still closed, arms resting on his knees. "The roads around the estate are sure to be some of the first places on which Rido and Ichijo will focus their search efforts. We are safer in here than wandering down the road without any form of transportation. I don't suppose you brought a car, Kiriyu?" he asked mildly. Whatever had brought Zero after them, alone like this, Kaname doubted it would have been very organized.
"We were dropped off and walked in. We were just supposed to watch the house; no one knew you two were there. By the time we found out, our radios were useless because of the storm," Zero muttered tiredly. He regretted now that he'd lost his. He could have at least tried to get it working now, to contact the Chairman. Surely, when he and Aido failed to report back in after a while, someone would wonder what had happened to them. But it seemed for now they were still on their own. "We improvised the best we could," he mumbled grumpily.
Kaname's eyes slitted open slightly, his attention focusing anew on Zero. "We?"
Zero looked away. "Aido was with me. He stayed behind to create a distraction so I could get into the house. I don't know what happened after that."
Kaname was silent for a long moment, an unreadable expression flittering across his face before he closed his eyes again. "If he was captured, Aido will not betray us," Kaname said quietly after a moment. He hoped the younger vampire hadn't been captured. He would almost wish his friend dead before in the hands of Rido and Ichijo, knowing the cruelty of which they were capable.
"We should get some rest," Kaname finally spoke again after the silence that seemed to have fallen over them became oppressive. "Rido will be searching for us the same – day or night, and we will move better at night." Yuki wouldn't, but that was easy to forget, and she was going to have to put up with the fact that her two companions were both vampires.
"Okay, I'll take the first watch," Zero volunteered, scooting back to lean against the nearest tree. Kaname did not miss the fact that Zero was sitting directly opposite him.
What are you going to watch out for, Kiriyu? Enemies?Or me? The thought passed through Kaname's mind. He knew the answer – both. As he sank down onto his side and closed his eyes, he smiled faintly. He couldn't blame him. Kaname wouldn't want to be sleeping across from a starved pureblood either. No sane person would.
Yuki curled up with her head resting on Zero's leg and eventually she stopped shivering and drifted off. Zero rested a hand on her shoulder as he gazed blankly across the small clearing at the trees and the sleeping pureblood. Kaname hadn't moved since he'd lain down. Zero couldn't even see him breathing, it was a little eerie and he had to resist the urge to creep over and feel for a pulse, just to be sure Kaname was still with them.
Zero was exhausted. His eyes burned and ached with weariness and his throat was sore. Crap... he was probably going to catch a cold from all this. It was incredibly hard to stay awake in the cold, quiet stillness with the others fast asleep, and Zero started pinching his thigh repeatedly in an effort to stay awake. Despite his resolve, however, the silver head soon began to nod, sliding down to rest on his chest as his body slackened against the tree and sleep stole unwittingly over him.
Zero awoke with a start. He hadn't meant to fall asleep and for a moment he didn't realize that was what had happened until the cold ache in his bones and the slanting angle of the sun told him that several hours had passed since last he'd been aware.
Yuki was still sleeping away, pillowed on his lap, but something was wrong. He knew it immediately. Zero blinked, trying to figure what it was, and then for half a second his heart stopped as he found himself staring across at an empty patch of ground beneath the dark tree across from him.
Kaname was gone.
Zero looked around quickly, the hairs on the back of his neck prickling fiercely as he imagined the pureblood breathing down his neck. But as he shook off the sleep-fog clouding his senses, he could tell Kaname was nowhere to be seen or felt in the immediate area.
He could sense the presence of another vampire, probably Kaname, not too far away though and Zero carefully eased out from under Yuki. She must be pretty exhausted because she barely stirred as he laid her head down on the warm patch of leaves he'd been sitting on. Zero didn't know why Kaname had gone off, call of nature possibly, but something in him warned that it might not be a good sign and he figured he'd better check it out.
Leaving Yuki alone, unguarded however... he didn't like that. So Zero pulled the gun out of his waistband and laid it down by her hand. He knew she could use it, even if she didn't like to. It was mostly a precaution. He could only feel one vampire in the vicinity, which he was now sure was Kaname. But what state the pureblood might be in... Zero wasn't so sure.
Making his way towards where he could vaguely sense the other presence, Zero moved slowly, scanning the trees. The farther he progressed, the more his skin started to crawl and the woods started to darken, despite the fact that it was a little after midday. True, not a lot of sunlight was puncturing the heavy cover of the woods, but it was unnaturally dark here, and Zero's senses were starting to ring deep warning bells.
He was getting that feeling again, like someone was watching him, raising the hairs on the back of his neck and forming ice in his stomach. Zero spun around quickly, but there was no one there. The chilling feeling persisted and he spun again, continually expecting to see someone right behind him. Zero suddenly wished he hadn't left his gun behind. Deep down he knew it was Kaname that was creating this feeling in him, whether intentionally or unintentionally, but that wasn't comforting at the moment. The idea that the pureblood might have flipped out, as even Kaname had been afraid might happen, was more than mildly terrifying.
Suddenly something told him to look up and he saw red eyes glowing in the branches over his head. He'd never seen vampire eyes glow that way before and his heart leapt up into his throat despite himself as he saw Kaname crouched on the limb of a tree branch overhead - coiled, cat-like. Zero had no idea how the wounded pureblood had gotten up there.
Kaname didn't move. He was just staring at Zero, following his every movement with the glowing eyes of a predator. His fingers were strangely elongated and talon-like, almost black rather than flesh colored, as they gripped the branch.
"Kaname?" Zero asked quietly, carefully, backing away cautiously and not taking his eyes off the other vampire. He was trying hard to find a recognizable spark in the pureblood's eyes, but he wasn't having much luck.
Kaname leapt down to the ground, landing crouched so feet and hands both touched before he rose, circling Zero silently, eyes never leaving him. Anyone who had never seen the pureblood before would not have known he was half dead by watching the deadly fluidity of his movements, but Zero, who had seen him before, could tell that for him, Kuran's motions were actually clumsy and uneven, like a wounded mountain lion circling his prey. But Zero was still definitely the prey.
"You shouldn't have followed me, Kiriyu..." Kaname's voice was a soft, supple hiss. The pureblood had awoken, cramping and retching with debilitating hunger, his insides almost literally starting to devour themselves. He couldn't go back to sleep, and he couldn't stay there, so close to two defenselessly sleeping sources of sustenance. It had taken the last of his will to run away, to hide here alone in the trees, trying to put temptation out of reach. Zero turning up was more than he could continue to fight against. "I was trying to stay away from you... I was trying..." there was a flicker of deep desperation in the glowing red eyes, but it was swallowed up in hunger.
Before either of them really realized it, Kaname was on top of Zero, his weight throwing the ex-human backward and knocking him off his feet. Kaname pinned Zero to the ground with his body, bound hands twisting ruthlessly into Zero's damp shirt, clawing the collar aside as the pureblood's head dropped towards the other vampire's neck.
Near panicked, Zero just managed to grab hold of Kaname's wrists, and more importantly, the cuffs encasing them.
"Obtempero! Stop, Kuran! Stop!" Zero initiated the charm and commanded at the same time, desperately shoving Kaname backwards and twisting away from the ravenously searching fangs.
Kaname's body went ridged with a soft, choking sound. He froze, but he was obviously fighting the charm, his body starting to tremble and jerk spasmodically as he rolled off of Zero. Zero followed, knowing he had to keep hold of the cuffs or his life expectancy was about two seconds or less.
He was starting to panic for an entirely different reason though, because Kuran's eyes rolled back in his head and he was jerking like he was going into some kind of seizure. Zero felt sick knowing he was probably causing it, but he didn't know what to do because the pureblood was going to kill him if he was released. Zero'd promised Kaname he wouldn't let him go crazy on them, but he hadn't expected it to be so hard to watch the other vampire suffer like this.
Suddenly Kaname's body went limp and his eyes closed, head falling to the side, his damp, tangled dark hair hanging across his face and brushing the leaves beneath him. The unnatural darkness seemed to lift some, allowing the sunlight to filter tentatively through the branches above once more. Lying there in the faintly dappled light on the dead leaf carpet of the forest floor, Kaname looked for all the world like a broken dark angel and Zero felt a weird lump rise in his throat. One hand remained warily on Kaname's cuffs, but the fingers of the other went swiftly to Kaname's neck, looking for a pulse as he rolled up on his elbow and knelt beside the still body.
Don't be dead. Please don't be dead.
"Come on, Kuran... if you're dead after costing me all this trouble, I'll kill you..." he muttered a bit hoarsely, fingers probing desperately when he couldn't find a pulse around the jagged, unhealed wounds that still adorned Kaname's throat.
Kaname groaned softly, wincing at the pressure on his injured neck and Zero felt a deep shudder of relief pass through him. He wanted to feel angry at the way he'd been attacked, but as Kaname's eyes fluttered open, the pureblood looked far too miserable and hopeless for Zero to work up any true ire.
Kaname swallowed raggedly, glancing down towards where Zero's hand was still resting on his restraints, silently holding him captive, then up towards the other vampire. His eyes slid shut again. "I'm sorry," he murmured faintly, almost inaudibly. "I should not have done that."
Kaname knew he'd hit the end. He couldn't control himself. Even now, if Zero released him from the charm keeping him still... he feared he'd go after the boy again. Dark despair welled in him. For all his efforts, all his belief that his parents had been right, that vampires and humans could co-exist peacefully... When it came down to it, there was still this part of him that he could not control. He was just as bad as his Uncle or anyone else.
"Forget it. Wasn't your fault," Zero said with a dismissive shake of his head. He was looking intently at Kaname, seeming to weigh something before he made a decision. Keeping one hand on Kaname's restraints, Zero lifted the other to the buttons of his shirt, undoing them and shifting his collar aside.
Kaname had opened his eyes again and was watching Zero silently, intensely.
Zero took a deep breath. He was about to take a pretty big risk, but it was the only thing he could do. "Look, Kaname, I know you need blood. So you can have mine. Fair's fair. But if I let you take it, if I release you... don't kill me, okay?" Zero gave a slightly ironic little smile. "I think it was you who pointed out how rude that would be with a willing donor."
A small shiver chased through Kaname's body. His gaze was fixed with disturbing intensity on Zero's neck. He gave a small, slow nod. He couldn't worry about the consequences of forming another blood bond right now. He badly needed what Zero was offering him.
Zero slowly removed his hands from Kaname's cuffs, releasing him from the charm holding him still.
Almost immediately, the pureblood reached up and pulled Zero back down to the ground with him. Rolling them both over so Zero was on his stomach and he was on top, the pureblood straddled the ex-human's hips on his knees. He shoved Zero down almost harshly into the ground as he leaned over him, his chest pressing against Zero's back
The wet, rough earth pressed into Zero's cheek and prickled damply through his shirt, his breath escaping him in a small, surprised grunt at the unexpected impact. Kaname's body kept the other vampire pinned as the pureblood's bound hands tangled in Zero's silver hair, yanking his head back and to the side, exposing the un-tattooed side of his pale neck.
Kaname's bodyweight was like an immovable sack of bricks crushing Zero down into the ground with far more strength than he would have expected the half-dead vampire to possess. As his head was jerked back and he felt warm breath on his neck, Zero felt a zing of fear shoot through him. This might not have been a great idea.
Kaname felt Zero tensing, as if toying with resisting, and he gave the hair he was gripping a vicious little jerk of warning. It was too late now, Zero had committed to this of his own free will, and Kaname would hold him to that. The pureblood no longer had the power to turn back. He was utterly starving to the point of near death and the need to survive was overriding everything else. He would have Zero's blood, one way or another.
The way Kaname had Zero pinned on his stomach, the vampire hunter couldn't reach or activate the cuffs the pureblood was still wearing, even if he wanted to. That was obviously intentional on Kaname's part. Zero was completely his. Kaname knew it, and Zero realized it now too with another sickening little jolt in the pit of his stomach.
"Kaname..." the voice was tense, a little angry, but underneath Kaname could practically taste the overriding fear.
Darkly, the pureblood fed on the fear rolling off the other. He had been hurt and abused beyond the limits of reason for so long... the anger of it, the dark urge to lash out, to exert power over someone else for a change was a throbbing knot unwinding swiftly in his gut. Kaname growled softly in his throat, an animalistic sound, as he let his fully extended fangs graze lightly across the side of Zero's exposed throat.
"Be still..." he hissed softly in warning, licking and caressing Zero's neck wickedly with his lips and tongue, not sure if it was because he wanted to or because he knew that would make the other boy uncomfortable. The taste of Zero's skin and the feel of his neck was delicious. Kaname nuzzled the damp shirt collar aside, briefly but hungrily exploring the delicate skin from collarbone to ear and back again.
Zero gasped softly at the weird sensations that shot through him as Kaname's teeth and mouth teased the exposed curve of his neck. His shivered and tried to squirm, but Kaname's weight held him pinned completely immobile. His mouth was dry. He was much more afraid than he ever wanted the pureblood to know. Zero had been bitten once in his life, and that had been once too many. Shizuka's memory was burned into him, an indelible scar that would never heal. The hatred he'd felt as she held him still, with the same kind of inhuman strength Kuran was holding him with now... The dark rage and fear as she'd drained him, his helpless gaze resting on his parents' dead bodies lying lifeless in puddles of their own blood on the floor.
Zero realized his heart was pounding rapidly against the hard earth. In fear, certainly, and anger, but also in... other sensations. Shameful sensations. Sensations that made strange knots and butterflies dance in his stomach as Kaname moved against his back, hot mouth devouring the side of his neck.
There was a sharp, momentary flare of pain as Kaname's fangs finally broke skin and sank into his flesh. Zero jerked slightly, grimacing. His hands, resting on either side of his head, curled into the dead leaves below him as if seeking purchase.
Kaname closed his eyes as Zero's blood washed across his senses. He drank in deep, rapid, starving gulps. It tasted like pure heaven and his chest shuddered slightly against the ex-human's back. It was as if the pureblood had been walking a hundred days in the desert without water. It was impossible for him to not drink as deeply and rapidly as possible, despite what that would do to Kiriyu.
Zero gasped softly at the intense, ruthlessly rapid draw being placed upon him. He'd known this wouldn't be pleasant when he offered it. He'd known how badly off Kaname was and it was a risk he'd accepted. Zero wouldn't renege on his word. He didn't try to fight. He owed this to the other vampire. The pureblood had saved his life, had given Zero his blood more than once, and Zero would see the debt settled. Fighting would have been useless anyway. He was completely in Kaname's power and all he could hope was that he hadn't made a fatal mistake by placing himself in this position.
Kaname was slowly feeling life starting to return to him and it was intoxicating. Zero's blood filled his mouth and pounded in his senses. He groaned softly against the pale neck as deep, intense pleasure washed through him. The sensation was more intense and shattering than he'd ever experienced before when drinking another's blood. His heart pounded and his already off-kilter senses went into sensual overdrive at the consummation of the bond between them. It was bitterly ironic; Kaname had now formed two blood bonds, neither out of love, neither of which he had actually wanted. His parents must be rolling in their graves. Deep down... it made him feel cheap, like some kind of whore.
Kaname's fingers knotted tighter in the silver hair. He took a page from Zero's book, intentionally sliding his teeth free only to bite down again right beside the first wound. He was rewarded by a sharp little yelp from his partner that sent deep shivers shuddering through his body. It was a delightfully dark sensation; no wonder Kiriyu had enjoyed it so much. Kaname did it again, slowly, savoring the taste and sensation of his partner's blood and helplessness, of the feeling of power it gave him. It was intensely satisfying, but after the second time, Kuran didn't do it again, letting his teeth remain in place. Much as part of him wanted to maul Zero ruthlessly, to rip his throat out, to take his rage and pain out on the nearest handy victim and hurt someone else the way he had been hurt... at the same time, he couldn't. If he started too far down that road in his current state, Kaname knew he would lose himself. Zero wasn't remotely the one who deserved his revenge. That had to be saved for Ichijo and Rido.
Zero's fingers dug into the ground hard enough to penetrate the layer of decomposing leaves, his nails digging desperately down into the hard, damp earth. Damn... He hadn't been aware what being double-bitten like that felt like on this end. It was inordinately painful, and he had no idea how Kuran had held still while he did that to him back when positions had been reversed. If Kaname kept it up, Zero would soon be bucking and struggling in his grasp, even without intending to. But at the same time, a hot rush of heat suffused his entire body, deeper and more intense than anything he'd ever experienced. It stole his breath and formed a hard, molten fist in his stomach and groin. Oh hell no... he was not, was not getting turned on by this! But he was.
Kaname's mouth was incredibly skillful. Even as he drained Zero's life away, his lips and tongue lavished attention across the wounds he'd caused and the exposed side of Zero's neck, wringing unexpected shivers of deep ecstasy from the ex-human and giving him no chance to recover from the wild heat thudding through his veins.
Damn you, Kuran. I didn't give you permission to make me feel this way...
The strength of the bond now connecting them intensified the sensations for both and Kaname's heart thudded against Zero's back. Another low growl, this time more of a purr, escaped his throat as he pressed up more fully against the other's body. Before, Kaname had merely felt a bit annoyed at himself for the way he'd reacted to Zero drinking his blood the first time. But after what Ichijo had done to him... after the way he'd been repeatedly, maliciously forced to have these kind of feelings, been tormented by his inability to control his own reactions to the bond with the older vampire... Kaname felt angry and ashamed at the feelings raking through him now. He hadn't asked for this, for any of this... he wasn't angry with Zero, but he was angry. Bitterly angry. And it fueled his arousal and blood lust.
His hips rocked against Zero in slow but forceful motions, pressing the other down repeatedly against the ground as he drank more and more, heedless now of what kind of damage he might wreak.
Zero groaned in protest as Kaname moved against him, his pale face flushing, not the least at the reaction being wrung from his own body as Kaname's hips pressed his mercilessly, repeatedly and exotically against the unyielding ground. Oh God... it felt so disturbingly, unimaginably good, the way the pureblood was moving against him, the sensual feeling of his own blood being drained away making his head spin and spin...
...and spin... but it wasn't only arousal making him dizzy now. His tense body was slackening in Kaname's grip as deeper dizziness started to take him. Spots danced before his eyes and his head tipped limply, dangling from where the other was holding his hair. "Kaname..." he groaned softly.
Kaname was barely aware that Zero was starting to fade. Some part of his mind knew it, but was trying to keep it from the rest of his consciousness, because he was still hungry... because he could drain the ex-human dry and it would only just begin to sate him. But the part that did know was clamoring for attention and as his body started to mend some from the worst of his injuries and the pain eased, it became easier to hear.
Kaname would never know if he would have been able to shake himself out of the dark blood daze in time to avoid killing his partner. Because the soft click of a weapon cocking brought his attention up short and a familiar voice sent a sliver of painful ice stabbing through his chest. Kaname turned, his new strength enabling him to instinctively spring to his feet, pulling Zero with him, his teeth still sunk possessively deep into the neck of the limp boy he was holding against his chest as he regarded the new arrival with dark, slightly dazed and unreadable eyes.
"K-Kaname... stop... l-let him go..." Yuki's voice wavered tremulously as she stood a few paces away, Zero's gun shaking in her hands. The weapon was pointed directly at Kaname. It was not an order. It was a plea, a desperate plea. There was nothing in her pale, anguished face that told whether or not she would actually be able to pull that trigger if she had to.
She'd woken up alone and found the gun where Zero had left it for her. The sound of Zero's voice raised in a yelp of pain had drawn her towards where she finally found her two friends. Yuki's expression was absolutely torn. She knew Kaname was suffering horribly; she did not blame him for needing to feed. But neither could she let him hurt Zero. Zero was frighteningly pale and limp and to Yuki it looked rather like Kaname was on the verge of killing him. She had to protect Zero, the same as she would have protected Kaname if situations were reversed... but just the act of pointing the gun at the pureblood seemed to drive a throbbing hot poker straight through her heart. Tears welled silently in her eyes.
The sight shocked Kaname completely back to his senses and he released Zero's hair and his neck, brushing a gentle, slightly trembling caress against the bite wound with his lips as he eased the ex-human's limp frame down to the ground, letting him lean against the tree. Kiriyu was still conscious, his chest heaving softly, but Kaname couldn't meet his eyes. Or Yuki's.
Well, she knew now, didn't she? She and Zero both. There wasn't any use pretending. This was the truth. This was what he was. What he would always be, no matter what ideals he held or what causes he supported. He was feeling better after drinking, but his wounds were too severe to completely heal and he was still much weaker than normal. Stumbling slightly, Kaname backed away to give the other two space and try to let them know he was no longer a threat to them. He finally raised his gaze to Yuki's for a moment, his eyes hopeless and anguished as they darted between her and Zero.
I'm sorry.
But the words just died in his throat. He sank to the ground a little ways off, sitting down and sinking his head into his bound hands, his tousled dark hair hanging down to obscure his face.
Yuki's heart ached fiercely at the look she'd seen in Kaname's eyes, and she wanted to run to him, to apologize, to offer comfort, to do something. But she was still worried about Zero. She hurried to his side, kneeling beside him. She dropped the gun as if it were a poisonous creature that she didn't like handling.
She cupped his cheek, turning his head towards her. "Zero, are you okay?"
Zero blinked a couple times, feeling a bit dazed, but he nodded as quickly as he was able, a hand snaking up to drag somewhat shakily through his hair. The bite wounds to his neck were still seeping a bit, but they were slowly healing up on their own. Kaname had drained him deeply, but not to the point where his healing ability had been completely negated. He had no idea how to rationalize what had just happened between him and the pureblood though. Not the blood drinking, the... other parts. The parts that still had his reeling body worked up and aching with what was definitely not pain.
"I'm fine, I'm fine Yuki, quit fretting," he mumbled, not meaning to be short but feeling pretty lousy. He was hungry now, he had a deep headache... and he was mortifyingly aroused as hell.
Yuki was completely used to Zero's attitude and took no offense. Blessedly, she also didn't seem to notice the other problem he was having. Zero pushed a little further upright, his gaze straying towards where Kaname was curled in on himself a little distance away. Damn... did he actually feel sorry for the pureblood who had almost killed him just now? He did. What an absolute idiot... but he couldn't help it. Something was tugging at him, making him ache to do something about the hurt written so clearly in the hunched, pale form. But what the hell was he supposed to do? Wasn't like Kaname would care about anything he had to say... right?
"It's okay, Yuki," he said after a moment, his tone a little gentler. He was touched, and grateful that Yuki had come to his rescue, but he didn't want her fretting... or... blaming the other vampire. Not for this, at least. Zero's conscious was too honest. "I told Kaname he could drink. I'm fine, promise."
Yuki was more relieved than she wanted to admit to hear that. She would have been understanding, even if Kaname had simply attacked Zero out of desperation. After all, she'd forgiven Zero for doing the same to her easy enough. But it still set her heart more at ease to know that even if Kaname had perhaps been tempted to go too far, he had not taken anything Zero had not offered. She was proud of Zero too... for doing that. Doing what she wished she could, but neither of them would let her do. She knew how Zero felt about vampires in general and about Kaname in particular and she thought it was a very mature and practical gesture on his part.
Yuki could see though that Zero's eyes were tinged dully with red. He may say he was fine, but he was hungry himself now. Her fingers slid to her collar, tugging it down just a little. "Zero... if you need to..." she whispered softly.
Yes. Zero needed to, but not here, not now. Not... not in front of Kaname. Yuki would never have intended it so, but taking her in plain view of the pureblood at this stage would have been far crueler than Zero was willing to be. He shook his head quickly. "I'm fine," he repeated. "Maybe later, okay?" he added, dropping his voice to a mere whisper and shooting a meaningful glance in Kaname's direction when Yuki's expression said she doubted him and might insist.
Yuki's brows furrowed. Of course... how could she have been so thoughtless? She would never intentionally hurt Kaname by putting the scent of her blood in the air while he was still hungry. She still missed the real reason why it would be hurtful to him. To her it was just a matter of providing food... which she could do for Zero, but Kaname wouldn't let her do for him. She didn't understand how vampires looked at blood drawing. Zero was only just beginning to understand himself.
The base of his throat throbbed oddly where the bite wound was healing up and his fingers slid up there absently. It was funny... an odd, empty ache that kept drawing his gaze towards Kaname. Was this normal? Was this part of that bond whatever-it-was that Kaname had warned him about weeks ago? He'd not thought of that when he made the offer, although it wouldn't have made a difference. Kuran had needed blood or he was going to either die or go wild on them. There'd been no other choice.
Great... just great... just exactly what he needed, more crap screwing with his head.
With a small start, Zero realized Kaname was pressing his fingers against the base of his own throat in an almost perfect unconscious mirror of Zero's actions, although his gaze was still downcast and he wasn't looking at Zero.
Yuki didn't notice what Zero was looking at because she'd already slid back to her feet, her hand brushing Zero's cheek tenderly one more time as if to assure herself he was really all right before she made her way silently over to where Kaname was sitting. She knelt down beside him, hesitantly reaching out and resting her hand lightly on his shoulder. She was glad to see that some of the worst damage to his back was at last beginning to heal. A crisscrossing of raw, barely healed welts still remained, testament to how badly he'd been hurt and how much it was going to take to get him back up to full strength, but at least he no longer looked like he'd just been through a meat grinder.
Kaname flinched when she touched him and Yuki almost drew back, but her instinct told her not to so she left her hand where it was. Kaname had always been there for her when she needed him. Now she knew he needed her, and she wished she knew how to be there for him too. There was absolute silence for a few moments. Kaname did not look in her direction. She realized after a moment that Kaname was... trembling. She could feel the deep, slight shiver of it under her hand and her heart completely broke for him. He'd been so very hurt, and she'd just pointed a gun at him. She didn't regret stepping in for Zero's sake, but she did regret this whole, horrible situation, and that she couldn't make everything better as she ached desperately to do.
"I'm sorry," she whispered finally, her voice hoarse with heartache. "I'm so sorry Kaname. I wouldn't hurt you, I couldn't. Please don't hate me," she pleaded softly. It was all she could think to say.
That brought Kaname's head up and he looked over at her quickly, vague surprise and confusion filtering through his sad eyes. Obviously, he thought the emotion should run the other way around.
"Hate you?" he smiled wanly, hesitantly reaching out and letting the back of his fingers brush softly down her cheek, the movement a bit clumsy because of his bound wrists, but infinitely tender. "That's not possible. But Yuki, you shouldn't point that gun until you're ready to pull the trigger. And you should be ready, dear one." He looked at her with an unfathomable expression. "When you were a child... I let you see me drinking Ruka's blood." The out-of-the-blue confession surprised Yuki, but Kaname was still speaking. "I needed you to know that I can never fit the pedestal you put me on. You don't fear me and you should fear me," Kaname's eyes were steeped in so much anguish it took Yuki's breath away just to see it.
"I thought once I could offer you the world... but I no longer have anything worth giving," the whisper was soft, broken. Kaname's fingers brushed tenderly through her hair then fell back to his lap. What kind of man would he be, to ask her to accept him in this screwed up state, with blackness nibbling at his soul and already bound to two other blood bonds? Even if he intended to kill one of the bond holders the very first chance he got. Right at this moment, the pureblood felt very much like damaged goods. Hell, between Ichijo still holding certain rights to the Kuran estates and finances from his guardianship position and Rido now stepping in to take over as the head of the family... Kaname very possibly wouldn't even have a figurative roof over his head by the time they got back to civilization. He had nothing at all to offer anyone.
"Don't say that!" the vehemence in Yuki's voice surprised Kaname, as did the soft tears that streaked down her cheeks. "Don't you dare say such stupid things!" Yuki almost snapped at him. "Nothing has changed! Nothing." Her voice dipped, her tone achingly earnest. "Your heart is a treasure, Kaname. It always has been and it always will be. No one can change that or take that away. You say I should be scared of you, but I'm sorry, I can't be. I can't be afraid of the boy who saved my life as a child, who always came running every time father thought up another stupid catastrophe that was supposed to have happened to me, who risked his life to save Zero, who was ready to die rather than risk hurting me when he was in agony and starving to death..." Yuki's voice choked. She caught Kaname's pale face between her hands, her thumbs gently tracing the faded, lingering bruises there. "So just stop being so dumb," she whispered, her voice incredibly tender despite the words.
Kaname seemed transfixed between shock and other, less definable but much deeper emotions. He stared at her, silently. Then he tipped his head into Yuki's hands, leaning into her touch as his head bowed... and she felt the hot warmth of silent, salty tears sliding down her fingers, obscured from view by the dark curtain of Kaname's hair falling around his face.
Yuki realized that in all the years she'd known him... she had never seen Kaname weep.
Zero rested his hands against the wet ground, letting his head hang for a moment. His back and shoulder muscles were on fire from carrying Yuki so long over such rough terrain. He'd not slept in over 48 hours now and he was exhausted. Trying to both take care of Yuki and Kaname – especially trying to take care of Kuran without looking like he was trying to take care of him – had taken their toll on the ex-human and he was hitting the end of his strength.
Kaname sank silently down to sit by a tree a few feet away, tipping his head back to rest against it as he breathed slowly and raggedly through his teeth. This night had been one long, unending hell. Sheer stubbornness had kept him moving, but it wasn't going to be enough much longer. His gaze held on Kiriyu for a moment as Zero rested, exhausted, on hands and knees. The boy had done well, and Kaname wasn't above silently admitting it. Zero had shouldered the heaviest end of the burden of their escape and continued trying to take care of everyone even as his own strength failed.
Kaname almost hated to mention that they were lost.
As the sun came up, it was obviously rising to their right, which meant they weren't heading towards the road, at least not by the short route. If they had been, they'd have been there by now, or at the very least near enough to hear passing cars. But there were no such sounds anywhere near, even to his sharp hearing - only the rustling drip of the wet forest and the chirp of the wakening birds. The Ichijos liked their privacy. The estate was situated far out in the country and there were miles upon miles of trackless woodlands surrounding it. Obviously, they had ended up forging deeper into them, rather than out. Kaname's sense of direction was usually impeccable, but he had to admit he had no idea where they were. He'd been in too much pain to keep track of direction or do anything other than simply keep following Zero's bobbing back through the long trek last night, struggling to put one foot in front of the other.
Zero finally rolled onto his side and sat back up, glancing somewhat accusingly towards the rising sun. Apparently he'd figured it out for himself.
Yuki blew on her cold hands, shivering underneath Zero's still sopping coat. She was probably the only one of them who was truly glad to see the sun rising. "Where are we?" she asked, looking around. She had been brought here unconscious and had very little idea where they'd escaped from or where they were going to.
Zero rubbed his neck with a sigh, feeling utterly disgusted with himself. "Lost," he said quietly. He didn't know how he'd gotten turned around last night, but with the storm and the danger and the unfamiliar landscape he'd had so many things to be keeping track of that it wasn't that surprising really.
Zero cast glance towards Kaname, either expecting, or daring the vampire to make a crack, but Kaname wasn't in the mood to be taking jabs, he was feeling far too poorly and had closed his eyes, resting expressionless against the tree behind him.
"If we bear east," Zero continued after a moment, nodding towards the rising sun. "We should be able to find the road again sooner or later. I'm sorry."
Yuki simply nodded, giving no indication of the deep inner groan that the thought of more walking brought to her. "It's not your fault, Zero, everything was really confusing last night," she tried to comfort.
"Actually, it's not a bad thing that we did not take the shortest route," Kaname added unexpectedly, eyes still closed, arms resting on his knees. "The roads around the estate are sure to be some of the first places on which Rido and Ichijo will focus their search efforts. We are safer in here than wandering down the road without any form of transportation. I don't suppose you brought a car, Kiriyu?" he asked mildly. Whatever had brought Zero after them, alone like this, Kaname doubted it would have been very organized.
"We were dropped off and walked in. We were just supposed to watch the house; no one knew you two were there. By the time we found out, our radios were useless because of the storm," Zero muttered tiredly. He regretted now that he'd lost his. He could have at least tried to get it working now, to contact the Chairman. Surely, when he and Aido failed to report back in after a while, someone would wonder what had happened to them. But it seemed for now they were still on their own. "We improvised the best we could," he mumbled grumpily.
Kaname's eyes slitted open slightly, his attention focusing anew on Zero. "We?"
Zero looked away. "Aido was with me. He stayed behind to create a distraction so I could get into the house. I don't know what happened after that."
Kaname was silent for a long moment, an unreadable expression flittering across his face before he closed his eyes again. "If he was captured, Aido will not betray us," Kaname said quietly after a moment. He hoped the younger vampire hadn't been captured. He would almost wish his friend dead before in the hands of Rido and Ichijo, knowing the cruelty of which they were capable.
"We should get some rest," Kaname finally spoke again after the silence that seemed to have fallen over them became oppressive. "Rido will be searching for us the same – day or night, and we will move better at night." Yuki wouldn't, but that was easy to forget, and she was going to have to put up with the fact that her two companions were both vampires.
"Okay, I'll take the first watch," Zero volunteered, scooting back to lean against the nearest tree. Kaname did not miss the fact that Zero was sitting directly opposite him.
What are you going to watch out for, Kiriyu? Enemies?Or me? The thought passed through Kaname's mind. He knew the answer – both. As he sank down onto his side and closed his eyes, he smiled faintly. He couldn't blame him. Kaname wouldn't want to be sleeping across from a starved pureblood either. No sane person would.
Yuki curled up with her head resting on Zero's leg and eventually she stopped shivering and drifted off. Zero rested a hand on her shoulder as he gazed blankly across the small clearing at the trees and the sleeping pureblood. Kaname hadn't moved since he'd lain down. Zero couldn't even see him breathing, it was a little eerie and he had to resist the urge to creep over and feel for a pulse, just to be sure Kaname was still with them.
Zero was exhausted. His eyes burned and ached with weariness and his throat was sore. Crap... he was probably going to catch a cold from all this. It was incredibly hard to stay awake in the cold, quiet stillness with the others fast asleep, and Zero started pinching his thigh repeatedly in an effort to stay awake. Despite his resolve, however, the silver head soon began to nod, sliding down to rest on his chest as his body slackened against the tree and sleep stole unwittingly over him.
Zero awoke with a start. He hadn't meant to fall asleep and for a moment he didn't realize that was what had happened until the cold ache in his bones and the slanting angle of the sun told him that several hours had passed since last he'd been aware.
Yuki was still sleeping away, pillowed on his lap, but something was wrong. He knew it immediately. Zero blinked, trying to figure what it was, and then for half a second his heart stopped as he found himself staring across at an empty patch of ground beneath the dark tree across from him.
Kaname was gone.
Zero looked around quickly, the hairs on the back of his neck prickling fiercely as he imagined the pureblood breathing down his neck. But as he shook off the sleep-fog clouding his senses, he could tell Kaname was nowhere to be seen or felt in the immediate area.
He could sense the presence of another vampire, probably Kaname, not too far away though and Zero carefully eased out from under Yuki. She must be pretty exhausted because she barely stirred as he laid her head down on the warm patch of leaves he'd been sitting on. Zero didn't know why Kaname had gone off, call of nature possibly, but something in him warned that it might not be a good sign and he figured he'd better check it out.
Leaving Yuki alone, unguarded however... he didn't like that. So Zero pulled the gun out of his waistband and laid it down by her hand. He knew she could use it, even if she didn't like to. It was mostly a precaution. He could only feel one vampire in the vicinity, which he was now sure was Kaname. But what state the pureblood might be in... Zero wasn't so sure.
Making his way towards where he could vaguely sense the other presence, Zero moved slowly, scanning the trees. The farther he progressed, the more his skin started to crawl and the woods started to darken, despite the fact that it was a little after midday. True, not a lot of sunlight was puncturing the heavy cover of the woods, but it was unnaturally dark here, and Zero's senses were starting to ring deep warning bells.
He was getting that feeling again, like someone was watching him, raising the hairs on the back of his neck and forming ice in his stomach. Zero spun around quickly, but there was no one there. The chilling feeling persisted and he spun again, continually expecting to see someone right behind him. Zero suddenly wished he hadn't left his gun behind. Deep down he knew it was Kaname that was creating this feeling in him, whether intentionally or unintentionally, but that wasn't comforting at the moment. The idea that the pureblood might have flipped out, as even Kaname had been afraid might happen, was more than mildly terrifying.
Suddenly something told him to look up and he saw red eyes glowing in the branches over his head. He'd never seen vampire eyes glow that way before and his heart leapt up into his throat despite himself as he saw Kaname crouched on the limb of a tree branch overhead - coiled, cat-like. Zero had no idea how the wounded pureblood had gotten up there.
Kaname didn't move. He was just staring at Zero, following his every movement with the glowing eyes of a predator. His fingers were strangely elongated and talon-like, almost black rather than flesh colored, as they gripped the branch.
"Kaname?" Zero asked quietly, carefully, backing away cautiously and not taking his eyes off the other vampire. He was trying hard to find a recognizable spark in the pureblood's eyes, but he wasn't having much luck.
Kaname leapt down to the ground, landing crouched so feet and hands both touched before he rose, circling Zero silently, eyes never leaving him. Anyone who had never seen the pureblood before would not have known he was half dead by watching the deadly fluidity of his movements, but Zero, who had seen him before, could tell that for him, Kuran's motions were actually clumsy and uneven, like a wounded mountain lion circling his prey. But Zero was still definitely the prey.
"You shouldn't have followed me, Kiriyu..." Kaname's voice was a soft, supple hiss. The pureblood had awoken, cramping and retching with debilitating hunger, his insides almost literally starting to devour themselves. He couldn't go back to sleep, and he couldn't stay there, so close to two defenselessly sleeping sources of sustenance. It had taken the last of his will to run away, to hide here alone in the trees, trying to put temptation out of reach. Zero turning up was more than he could continue to fight against. "I was trying to stay away from you... I was trying..." there was a flicker of deep desperation in the glowing red eyes, but it was swallowed up in hunger.
Before either of them really realized it, Kaname was on top of Zero, his weight throwing the ex-human backward and knocking him off his feet. Kaname pinned Zero to the ground with his body, bound hands twisting ruthlessly into Zero's damp shirt, clawing the collar aside as the pureblood's head dropped towards the other vampire's neck.
Near panicked, Zero just managed to grab hold of Kaname's wrists, and more importantly, the cuffs encasing them.
"Obtempero! Stop, Kuran! Stop!" Zero initiated the charm and commanded at the same time, desperately shoving Kaname backwards and twisting away from the ravenously searching fangs.
Kaname's body went ridged with a soft, choking sound. He froze, but he was obviously fighting the charm, his body starting to tremble and jerk spasmodically as he rolled off of Zero. Zero followed, knowing he had to keep hold of the cuffs or his life expectancy was about two seconds or less.
He was starting to panic for an entirely different reason though, because Kuran's eyes rolled back in his head and he was jerking like he was going into some kind of seizure. Zero felt sick knowing he was probably causing it, but he didn't know what to do because the pureblood was going to kill him if he was released. Zero'd promised Kaname he wouldn't let him go crazy on them, but he hadn't expected it to be so hard to watch the other vampire suffer like this.
Suddenly Kaname's body went limp and his eyes closed, head falling to the side, his damp, tangled dark hair hanging across his face and brushing the leaves beneath him. The unnatural darkness seemed to lift some, allowing the sunlight to filter tentatively through the branches above once more. Lying there in the faintly dappled light on the dead leaf carpet of the forest floor, Kaname looked for all the world like a broken dark angel and Zero felt a weird lump rise in his throat. One hand remained warily on Kaname's cuffs, but the fingers of the other went swiftly to Kaname's neck, looking for a pulse as he rolled up on his elbow and knelt beside the still body.
Don't be dead. Please don't be dead.
"Come on, Kuran... if you're dead after costing me all this trouble, I'll kill you..." he muttered a bit hoarsely, fingers probing desperately when he couldn't find a pulse around the jagged, unhealed wounds that still adorned Kaname's throat.
Kaname groaned softly, wincing at the pressure on his injured neck and Zero felt a deep shudder of relief pass through him. He wanted to feel angry at the way he'd been attacked, but as Kaname's eyes fluttered open, the pureblood looked far too miserable and hopeless for Zero to work up any true ire.
Kaname swallowed raggedly, glancing down towards where Zero's hand was still resting on his restraints, silently holding him captive, then up towards the other vampire. His eyes slid shut again. "I'm sorry," he murmured faintly, almost inaudibly. "I should not have done that."
Kaname knew he'd hit the end. He couldn't control himself. Even now, if Zero released him from the charm keeping him still... he feared he'd go after the boy again. Dark despair welled in him. For all his efforts, all his belief that his parents had been right, that vampires and humans could co-exist peacefully... When it came down to it, there was still this part of him that he could not control. He was just as bad as his Uncle or anyone else.
"Forget it. Wasn't your fault," Zero said with a dismissive shake of his head. He was looking intently at Kaname, seeming to weigh something before he made a decision. Keeping one hand on Kaname's restraints, Zero lifted the other to the buttons of his shirt, undoing them and shifting his collar aside.
Kaname had opened his eyes again and was watching Zero silently, intensely.
Zero took a deep breath. He was about to take a pretty big risk, but it was the only thing he could do. "Look, Kaname, I know you need blood. So you can have mine. Fair's fair. But if I let you take it, if I release you... don't kill me, okay?" Zero gave a slightly ironic little smile. "I think it was you who pointed out how rude that would be with a willing donor."
A small shiver chased through Kaname's body. His gaze was fixed with disturbing intensity on Zero's neck. He gave a small, slow nod. He couldn't worry about the consequences of forming another blood bond right now. He badly needed what Zero was offering him.
Zero slowly removed his hands from Kaname's cuffs, releasing him from the charm holding him still.
Almost immediately, the pureblood reached up and pulled Zero back down to the ground with him. Rolling them both over so Zero was on his stomach and he was on top, the pureblood straddled the ex-human's hips on his knees. He shoved Zero down almost harshly into the ground as he leaned over him, his chest pressing against Zero's back
The wet, rough earth pressed into Zero's cheek and prickled damply through his shirt, his breath escaping him in a small, surprised grunt at the unexpected impact. Kaname's body kept the other vampire pinned as the pureblood's bound hands tangled in Zero's silver hair, yanking his head back and to the side, exposing the un-tattooed side of his pale neck.
Kaname's bodyweight was like an immovable sack of bricks crushing Zero down into the ground with far more strength than he would have expected the half-dead vampire to possess. As his head was jerked back and he felt warm breath on his neck, Zero felt a zing of fear shoot through him. This might not have been a great idea.
Kaname felt Zero tensing, as if toying with resisting, and he gave the hair he was gripping a vicious little jerk of warning. It was too late now, Zero had committed to this of his own free will, and Kaname would hold him to that. The pureblood no longer had the power to turn back. He was utterly starving to the point of near death and the need to survive was overriding everything else. He would have Zero's blood, one way or another.
The way Kaname had Zero pinned on his stomach, the vampire hunter couldn't reach or activate the cuffs the pureblood was still wearing, even if he wanted to. That was obviously intentional on Kaname's part. Zero was completely his. Kaname knew it, and Zero realized it now too with another sickening little jolt in the pit of his stomach.
"Kaname..." the voice was tense, a little angry, but underneath Kaname could practically taste the overriding fear.
Darkly, the pureblood fed on the fear rolling off the other. He had been hurt and abused beyond the limits of reason for so long... the anger of it, the dark urge to lash out, to exert power over someone else for a change was a throbbing knot unwinding swiftly in his gut. Kaname growled softly in his throat, an animalistic sound, as he let his fully extended fangs graze lightly across the side of Zero's exposed throat.
"Be still..." he hissed softly in warning, licking and caressing Zero's neck wickedly with his lips and tongue, not sure if it was because he wanted to or because he knew that would make the other boy uncomfortable. The taste of Zero's skin and the feel of his neck was delicious. Kaname nuzzled the damp shirt collar aside, briefly but hungrily exploring the delicate skin from collarbone to ear and back again.
Zero gasped softly at the weird sensations that shot through him as Kaname's teeth and mouth teased the exposed curve of his neck. His shivered and tried to squirm, but Kaname's weight held him pinned completely immobile. His mouth was dry. He was much more afraid than he ever wanted the pureblood to know. Zero had been bitten once in his life, and that had been once too many. Shizuka's memory was burned into him, an indelible scar that would never heal. The hatred he'd felt as she held him still, with the same kind of inhuman strength Kuran was holding him with now... The dark rage and fear as she'd drained him, his helpless gaze resting on his parents' dead bodies lying lifeless in puddles of their own blood on the floor.
Zero realized his heart was pounding rapidly against the hard earth. In fear, certainly, and anger, but also in... other sensations. Shameful sensations. Sensations that made strange knots and butterflies dance in his stomach as Kaname moved against his back, hot mouth devouring the side of his neck.
There was a sharp, momentary flare of pain as Kaname's fangs finally broke skin and sank into his flesh. Zero jerked slightly, grimacing. His hands, resting on either side of his head, curled into the dead leaves below him as if seeking purchase.
Kaname closed his eyes as Zero's blood washed across his senses. He drank in deep, rapid, starving gulps. It tasted like pure heaven and his chest shuddered slightly against the ex-human's back. It was as if the pureblood had been walking a hundred days in the desert without water. It was impossible for him to not drink as deeply and rapidly as possible, despite what that would do to Kiriyu.
Zero gasped softly at the intense, ruthlessly rapid draw being placed upon him. He'd known this wouldn't be pleasant when he offered it. He'd known how badly off Kaname was and it was a risk he'd accepted. Zero wouldn't renege on his word. He didn't try to fight. He owed this to the other vampire. The pureblood had saved his life, had given Zero his blood more than once, and Zero would see the debt settled. Fighting would have been useless anyway. He was completely in Kaname's power and all he could hope was that he hadn't made a fatal mistake by placing himself in this position.
Kaname was slowly feeling life starting to return to him and it was intoxicating. Zero's blood filled his mouth and pounded in his senses. He groaned softly against the pale neck as deep, intense pleasure washed through him. The sensation was more intense and shattering than he'd ever experienced before when drinking another's blood. His heart pounded and his already off-kilter senses went into sensual overdrive at the consummation of the bond between them. It was bitterly ironic; Kaname had now formed two blood bonds, neither out of love, neither of which he had actually wanted. His parents must be rolling in their graves. Deep down... it made him feel cheap, like some kind of whore.
Kaname's fingers knotted tighter in the silver hair. He took a page from Zero's book, intentionally sliding his teeth free only to bite down again right beside the first wound. He was rewarded by a sharp little yelp from his partner that sent deep shivers shuddering through his body. It was a delightfully dark sensation; no wonder Kiriyu had enjoyed it so much. Kaname did it again, slowly, savoring the taste and sensation of his partner's blood and helplessness, of the feeling of power it gave him. It was intensely satisfying, but after the second time, Kuran didn't do it again, letting his teeth remain in place. Much as part of him wanted to maul Zero ruthlessly, to rip his throat out, to take his rage and pain out on the nearest handy victim and hurt someone else the way he had been hurt... at the same time, he couldn't. If he started too far down that road in his current state, Kaname knew he would lose himself. Zero wasn't remotely the one who deserved his revenge. That had to be saved for Ichijo and Rido.
Zero's fingers dug into the ground hard enough to penetrate the layer of decomposing leaves, his nails digging desperately down into the hard, damp earth. Damn... He hadn't been aware what being double-bitten like that felt like on this end. It was inordinately painful, and he had no idea how Kuran had held still while he did that to him back when positions had been reversed. If Kaname kept it up, Zero would soon be bucking and struggling in his grasp, even without intending to. But at the same time, a hot rush of heat suffused his entire body, deeper and more intense than anything he'd ever experienced. It stole his breath and formed a hard, molten fist in his stomach and groin. Oh hell no... he was not, was not getting turned on by this! But he was.
Kaname's mouth was incredibly skillful. Even as he drained Zero's life away, his lips and tongue lavished attention across the wounds he'd caused and the exposed side of Zero's neck, wringing unexpected shivers of deep ecstasy from the ex-human and giving him no chance to recover from the wild heat thudding through his veins.
Damn you, Kuran. I didn't give you permission to make me feel this way...
The strength of the bond now connecting them intensified the sensations for both and Kaname's heart thudded against Zero's back. Another low growl, this time more of a purr, escaped his throat as he pressed up more fully against the other's body. Before, Kaname had merely felt a bit annoyed at himself for the way he'd reacted to Zero drinking his blood the first time. But after what Ichijo had done to him... after the way he'd been repeatedly, maliciously forced to have these kind of feelings, been tormented by his inability to control his own reactions to the bond with the older vampire... Kaname felt angry and ashamed at the feelings raking through him now. He hadn't asked for this, for any of this... he wasn't angry with Zero, but he was angry. Bitterly angry. And it fueled his arousal and blood lust.
His hips rocked against Zero in slow but forceful motions, pressing the other down repeatedly against the ground as he drank more and more, heedless now of what kind of damage he might wreak.
Zero groaned in protest as Kaname moved against him, his pale face flushing, not the least at the reaction being wrung from his own body as Kaname's hips pressed his mercilessly, repeatedly and exotically against the unyielding ground. Oh God... it felt so disturbingly, unimaginably good, the way the pureblood was moving against him, the sensual feeling of his own blood being drained away making his head spin and spin...
...and spin... but it wasn't only arousal making him dizzy now. His tense body was slackening in Kaname's grip as deeper dizziness started to take him. Spots danced before his eyes and his head tipped limply, dangling from where the other was holding his hair. "Kaname..." he groaned softly.
Kaname was barely aware that Zero was starting to fade. Some part of his mind knew it, but was trying to keep it from the rest of his consciousness, because he was still hungry... because he could drain the ex-human dry and it would only just begin to sate him. But the part that did know was clamoring for attention and as his body started to mend some from the worst of his injuries and the pain eased, it became easier to hear.
Kaname would never know if he would have been able to shake himself out of the dark blood daze in time to avoid killing his partner. Because the soft click of a weapon cocking brought his attention up short and a familiar voice sent a sliver of painful ice stabbing through his chest. Kaname turned, his new strength enabling him to instinctively spring to his feet, pulling Zero with him, his teeth still sunk possessively deep into the neck of the limp boy he was holding against his chest as he regarded the new arrival with dark, slightly dazed and unreadable eyes.
"K-Kaname... stop... l-let him go..." Yuki's voice wavered tremulously as she stood a few paces away, Zero's gun shaking in her hands. The weapon was pointed directly at Kaname. It was not an order. It was a plea, a desperate plea. There was nothing in her pale, anguished face that told whether or not she would actually be able to pull that trigger if she had to.
She'd woken up alone and found the gun where Zero had left it for her. The sound of Zero's voice raised in a yelp of pain had drawn her towards where she finally found her two friends. Yuki's expression was absolutely torn. She knew Kaname was suffering horribly; she did not blame him for needing to feed. But neither could she let him hurt Zero. Zero was frighteningly pale and limp and to Yuki it looked rather like Kaname was on the verge of killing him. She had to protect Zero, the same as she would have protected Kaname if situations were reversed... but just the act of pointing the gun at the pureblood seemed to drive a throbbing hot poker straight through her heart. Tears welled silently in her eyes.
The sight shocked Kaname completely back to his senses and he released Zero's hair and his neck, brushing a gentle, slightly trembling caress against the bite wound with his lips as he eased the ex-human's limp frame down to the ground, letting him lean against the tree. Kiriyu was still conscious, his chest heaving softly, but Kaname couldn't meet his eyes. Or Yuki's.
Well, she knew now, didn't she? She and Zero both. There wasn't any use pretending. This was the truth. This was what he was. What he would always be, no matter what ideals he held or what causes he supported. He was feeling better after drinking, but his wounds were too severe to completely heal and he was still much weaker than normal. Stumbling slightly, Kaname backed away to give the other two space and try to let them know he was no longer a threat to them. He finally raised his gaze to Yuki's for a moment, his eyes hopeless and anguished as they darted between her and Zero.
I'm sorry.
But the words just died in his throat. He sank to the ground a little ways off, sitting down and sinking his head into his bound hands, his tousled dark hair hanging down to obscure his face.
Yuki's heart ached fiercely at the look she'd seen in Kaname's eyes, and she wanted to run to him, to apologize, to offer comfort, to do something. But she was still worried about Zero. She hurried to his side, kneeling beside him. She dropped the gun as if it were a poisonous creature that she didn't like handling.
She cupped his cheek, turning his head towards her. "Zero, are you okay?"
Zero blinked a couple times, feeling a bit dazed, but he nodded as quickly as he was able, a hand snaking up to drag somewhat shakily through his hair. The bite wounds to his neck were still seeping a bit, but they were slowly healing up on their own. Kaname had drained him deeply, but not to the point where his healing ability had been completely negated. He had no idea how to rationalize what had just happened between him and the pureblood though. Not the blood drinking, the... other parts. The parts that still had his reeling body worked up and aching with what was definitely not pain.
"I'm fine, I'm fine Yuki, quit fretting," he mumbled, not meaning to be short but feeling pretty lousy. He was hungry now, he had a deep headache... and he was mortifyingly aroused as hell.
Yuki was completely used to Zero's attitude and took no offense. Blessedly, she also didn't seem to notice the other problem he was having. Zero pushed a little further upright, his gaze straying towards where Kaname was curled in on himself a little distance away. Damn... did he actually feel sorry for the pureblood who had almost killed him just now? He did. What an absolute idiot... but he couldn't help it. Something was tugging at him, making him ache to do something about the hurt written so clearly in the hunched, pale form. But what the hell was he supposed to do? Wasn't like Kaname would care about anything he had to say... right?
"It's okay, Yuki," he said after a moment, his tone a little gentler. He was touched, and grateful that Yuki had come to his rescue, but he didn't want her fretting... or... blaming the other vampire. Not for this, at least. Zero's conscious was too honest. "I told Kaname he could drink. I'm fine, promise."
Yuki was more relieved than she wanted to admit to hear that. She would have been understanding, even if Kaname had simply attacked Zero out of desperation. After all, she'd forgiven Zero for doing the same to her easy enough. But it still set her heart more at ease to know that even if Kaname had perhaps been tempted to go too far, he had not taken anything Zero had not offered. She was proud of Zero too... for doing that. Doing what she wished she could, but neither of them would let her do. She knew how Zero felt about vampires in general and about Kaname in particular and she thought it was a very mature and practical gesture on his part.
Yuki could see though that Zero's eyes were tinged dully with red. He may say he was fine, but he was hungry himself now. Her fingers slid to her collar, tugging it down just a little. "Zero... if you need to..." she whispered softly.
Yes. Zero needed to, but not here, not now. Not... not in front of Kaname. Yuki would never have intended it so, but taking her in plain view of the pureblood at this stage would have been far crueler than Zero was willing to be. He shook his head quickly. "I'm fine," he repeated. "Maybe later, okay?" he added, dropping his voice to a mere whisper and shooting a meaningful glance in Kaname's direction when Yuki's expression said she doubted him and might insist.
Yuki's brows furrowed. Of course... how could she have been so thoughtless? She would never intentionally hurt Kaname by putting the scent of her blood in the air while he was still hungry. She still missed the real reason why it would be hurtful to him. To her it was just a matter of providing food... which she could do for Zero, but Kaname wouldn't let her do for him. She didn't understand how vampires looked at blood drawing. Zero was only just beginning to understand himself.
The base of his throat throbbed oddly where the bite wound was healing up and his fingers slid up there absently. It was funny... an odd, empty ache that kept drawing his gaze towards Kaname. Was this normal? Was this part of that bond whatever-it-was that Kaname had warned him about weeks ago? He'd not thought of that when he made the offer, although it wouldn't have made a difference. Kuran had needed blood or he was going to either die or go wild on them. There'd been no other choice.
Great... just great... just exactly what he needed, more crap screwing with his head.
With a small start, Zero realized Kaname was pressing his fingers against the base of his own throat in an almost perfect unconscious mirror of Zero's actions, although his gaze was still downcast and he wasn't looking at Zero.
Yuki didn't notice what Zero was looking at because she'd already slid back to her feet, her hand brushing Zero's cheek tenderly one more time as if to assure herself he was really all right before she made her way silently over to where Kaname was sitting. She knelt down beside him, hesitantly reaching out and resting her hand lightly on his shoulder. She was glad to see that some of the worst damage to his back was at last beginning to heal. A crisscrossing of raw, barely healed welts still remained, testament to how badly he'd been hurt and how much it was going to take to get him back up to full strength, but at least he no longer looked like he'd just been through a meat grinder.
Kaname flinched when she touched him and Yuki almost drew back, but her instinct told her not to so she left her hand where it was. Kaname had always been there for her when she needed him. Now she knew he needed her, and she wished she knew how to be there for him too. There was absolute silence for a few moments. Kaname did not look in her direction. She realized after a moment that Kaname was... trembling. She could feel the deep, slight shiver of it under her hand and her heart completely broke for him. He'd been so very hurt, and she'd just pointed a gun at him. She didn't regret stepping in for Zero's sake, but she did regret this whole, horrible situation, and that she couldn't make everything better as she ached desperately to do.
"I'm sorry," she whispered finally, her voice hoarse with heartache. "I'm so sorry Kaname. I wouldn't hurt you, I couldn't. Please don't hate me," she pleaded softly. It was all she could think to say.
That brought Kaname's head up and he looked over at her quickly, vague surprise and confusion filtering through his sad eyes. Obviously, he thought the emotion should run the other way around.
"Hate you?" he smiled wanly, hesitantly reaching out and letting the back of his fingers brush softly down her cheek, the movement a bit clumsy because of his bound wrists, but infinitely tender. "That's not possible. But Yuki, you shouldn't point that gun until you're ready to pull the trigger. And you should be ready, dear one." He looked at her with an unfathomable expression. "When you were a child... I let you see me drinking Ruka's blood." The out-of-the-blue confession surprised Yuki, but Kaname was still speaking. "I needed you to know that I can never fit the pedestal you put me on. You don't fear me and you should fear me," Kaname's eyes were steeped in so much anguish it took Yuki's breath away just to see it.
"I thought once I could offer you the world... but I no longer have anything worth giving," the whisper was soft, broken. Kaname's fingers brushed tenderly through her hair then fell back to his lap. What kind of man would he be, to ask her to accept him in this screwed up state, with blackness nibbling at his soul and already bound to two other blood bonds? Even if he intended to kill one of the bond holders the very first chance he got. Right at this moment, the pureblood felt very much like damaged goods. Hell, between Ichijo still holding certain rights to the Kuran estates and finances from his guardianship position and Rido now stepping in to take over as the head of the family... Kaname very possibly wouldn't even have a figurative roof over his head by the time they got back to civilization. He had nothing at all to offer anyone.
"Don't say that!" the vehemence in Yuki's voice surprised Kaname, as did the soft tears that streaked down her cheeks. "Don't you dare say such stupid things!" Yuki almost snapped at him. "Nothing has changed! Nothing." Her voice dipped, her tone achingly earnest. "Your heart is a treasure, Kaname. It always has been and it always will be. No one can change that or take that away. You say I should be scared of you, but I'm sorry, I can't be. I can't be afraid of the boy who saved my life as a child, who always came running every time father thought up another stupid catastrophe that was supposed to have happened to me, who risked his life to save Zero, who was ready to die rather than risk hurting me when he was in agony and starving to death..." Yuki's voice choked. She caught Kaname's pale face between her hands, her thumbs gently tracing the faded, lingering bruises there. "So just stop being so dumb," she whispered, her voice incredibly tender despite the words.
Kaname seemed transfixed between shock and other, less definable but much deeper emotions. He stared at her, silently. Then he tipped his head into Yuki's hands, leaning into her touch as his head bowed... and she felt the hot warmth of silent, salty tears sliding down her fingers, obscured from view by the dark curtain of Kaname's hair falling around his face.
Yuki realized that in all the years she'd known him... she had never seen Kaname weep.
