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posted by CuteCuddly
So, I decided to insert myself in a fanfic. Yay. Hope you enjoy:

I rub my eyes. Was I dreaming? The last thing I remember was...well...having writers block over a fan fiction story on my laptop. Now I was somewhere else. Not my room. I knew I was in the USA. When I found out, that's when I knew, things had gotten weird. I don't even LIVE in the US! I'm halfway across the world! Of course, normal days ARE weird, but this is weirder than weird...

I wander around a while, trying to figure out where on earth I am. That's when I notice the zoo. Maybe someone there can tell me.

I enter the zoo ad talk to the first person I meet. A head-haired zookeeper.

"Excuse me," I say, "can you tell me where I am?"
"We have three rules in this zoo," she replies. "Don't feed the animals, don't touch the animals, and don't ask me stupid questions." And she turned away.
"How very helpful," I mutter. "But where have I heard that before?"

I figure it out when I see the penguins, smiling and waving at the crowds. I push my way to the front and my suspicions were correct.

"I'm in the Central Park Zoo," I screech quietly. I find a place to hide, until the zoo closed.

When the zookeeper, I now know is Alice, closed the gates, I come out of hiding. I make my way to the penguins’ habitat, and climbed over the fence. The penguins were nowhere in sight, so I suspect they are underground in the HQ.

I carefully remove the fish-bowl door and peek inside. I let out a small squeal. The penguins are right below me, the flat-headed one talking to his team.

"My gut's got a weird feeling," he says.
"Indigestion?" the tall one asks. "Or, is something going to happen?"
"Something's going to happen, and I'm not happy about it."
"Is it going to hurt us, Skippah?" the littlest one asks.
"I don't know," the leader replies. "But it's going happen soon."

I can't help but wonder what this thing that's going happen is. I keep watching, as the tall one speaks.

"Can I show you guys the new dance I made up for the cute and cuddly routine?" he asks.
"Sure, go ahead," the flat-headed one says, cheerfully.

The tall one begins to waggle his hips and jiggle and wriggle in the most delightful way. I can't help but giggle quietly. Only, it's not as quiet as I think and the flat-headed one immediately spots me.

"Security breech," he cries and the four of them spring into action.

The next thing I know, I am on the ground, being pinned by four penguins. Two holding down my arms, one holding down my legs (they're surprisingly strong) and the flat-headed one standing on my stomach.

"Who are you, and who do you work for?"
"I am..." I think about this. Should I tell him my name? Then I have an idea.
"Classified," I say, and I see he is taken aback. "As for who I work for, I work for no-one."
"Failing to give me intel, huh?" he says, rubbing his...chin? "I knew it, you're a spy."
"Ok, now THAT'S rediculus," I snap. "Me? A spy? I'm 12 years old. Do you think I even have the capabilty of being a spy?"
"Skipper," the tall one says, letting go of my right wrist. "She has got a point."

Skipper glares at me, but jumps off my chest al the same.
"Release her," he sighs. The smaller penguin let go of my left wrist.
"Aww," says the one holding my feet. "Gvyisn bdyuoe vtys."
"I know you wanted to cut a human girl up with a chainsaw," the leader says. "Maybe next time."

"Ok. now I know about your secret operation and such," I say. "Are you going to have to wipe my memory?"
"Kowalski?"
"No can do, Skipper," the tall one sighs. "I don't have the technoligy."
"Then I suppose she has to join," the leader considered his remark. "I can always use a new recruit."
My eyes, I'm sure, pop out of my head.
"That'll be amazing," I cry, grabbing the little penguin and spinning him around. "I'll be the best recruit ever."

The tall penguin, takes out a ray-gun.
"This will turn you into a penguin," he says. "It won't hurt excpet for a little pinch."
"Followed by the breif sensation of a thousands suns buringing in her skull?" the British one asks, nervously.
"No, just a pinch, and the feeling of throwing up your guts and unspeakable things from your stomach."
"Yeah, I don't think I can-" before I can finish, I am shot by a blue beam. I feel the said pinch, but not the feeling of throwing up my guts and unspeakable things form my stomach.
"How do you feel?" the leader asks.
"Dizzy," I say. My vision is blurry, but that's probably because my glasses were knocked off when I got ray-gunned.
"Can someone get my glasses? I can't see a dran thing."

The littlest avian hands me my glasses and I put them on. When I could see, I see the penguins had grown. No, I had shruck. Not only that, but I had flippers and feathers and a beak.
"Ok, this is officially weird,"
"You know it, sister," says flatty.

"Ok, now that I'm a penguin, can I know who you guys are?"
"Fine, I'm Skipper. I am the Skipper. You can call me Skipper." I hold out my hand, I mean flipper and he shakes it.
"I am Kowalski," the tall, rather handsome one says. "I am the scientist and options guy."
"Hey, I like science...and history...and maths...but not really grammer."
"Good to know," Kowalski says. I think he was being sarcastic, but I'm not sure.
"Rico," the one who wanted to cut me up says. "Hvvus byusfvyu svyucva xsvytcavc vytsvf KABOOM!!!"
"Oookaay," I say.
"He said that's he's Rico and he's the weapons specialist and he likes explsions and kabooms." Kowalski said. Wow, even his voice is nice.
And I'm private," the littlest one says, breaking me out of my thoughts. "I'm private first class and I love lunacorns and hugs and friends."
"Aww, you're so sweet," I say.

"Now that you know who we are, can you tell us who you are?"
"Oh yeah," I say. "I'm..." I think for a moment. Should I tell these crazy birds my name? What if they're freaky stalkers? Thne I remember my Fanpop account.
"I'm CC," I say.
"What's that stand for?" Skipper asks.
"Nothing, it's just CC."
"I see," he says, eying my suspisously. "I'll buy that."

"Skippah, where will she sleep?" Private whispers.
"Kowalski, bedtime options."
"Well, one of us could give up our bunk for tonight unitl we find better arangments," Kowalski says.
"Any others?"
"No,"
"Then who will give up tehy're bunk?" No-one volenteers. Skipper sighs.
"Fine," he says. "I will."
"No need," I say quickly. "I'm alright sleeping on the floor, over there maybe," I point to the place near the periscope. "I just need a pillow and blanket.
"Well, that's easy," Private tweets and hurries off to get the wanted items.

When he returns, I set myself up comfortably.
"I must warn you," Skipper says. "We wake up early, at least 0600 hours."
"I useually wake up ay seven, but I'll survive an hour earlier." I say with a yawn.
"You'll be doing trainin with us," Skipper says.
"Ok," I say, closing my eyes. "Sounds fun."

I take off my glasses and put them next to me. I crul up under the blanket and I watch the penguins climbed into their assigned bunks. I soon fall asleep and drift off to dreamland.
posted by Tressa-pom
A sunny day without training... We don’t know why Skipper let us do anything we want on this day. After our hard secret missions, we really need a holiday.
Scene 1 –HQ
Kowalski is in his lab, he trying to invent new inventions. Rico is watching TV. Private is reading lunacorns magazine.
Skipper: Boys, come here. We are going to get some snow cones. (Looking around) Where is Kowalski?
Private: He is in lab.
Me (Tressa): He invents new inventions that something turns into robot.
Rico: Uhh?
Me (Tressa): It’s not dangerous.
Skipper: Really?
Tressa: And… I must do something. Can I stay at HQ?...
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posted by Tressa-pom
A sunny day without training... We don’t know why Skipper let us do anything we want on this day. After our hard secret missions, we really need a holiday.
Scene 1 –HQ
Kowalski is in his lab, he trying to invent new inventions. Rico is watching TV. Private is reading lunacorns magazine.
Skipper: Boys, come here. We are going to get some snow cones. (Looking around) Where is Kowalski?
Private: He is in lab.
Me (Tressa): He invents new inventions that something turns into robot.
Rico: Uhh?
Me (Tressa): It’s not dangerous.
Skipper: Really?
Tressa: And… I must do something. Can I stay at HQ?...
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*I have posted this on the Skilene site but i thought its not JUST about Skilene...Hope u lyk!*

A silent figure moved in the darkness,he wore a hoddie jacket in order to cover his face. He left a note on his bunk, turning around to watch his peaceful unit in a deep sleep. He sighed and turned around, out of the HQ and onto the 'island'. "HEEY Skipper!" A cheery voice said behind him. "SSSHHHH!!!!!!" He said covering Marlene's mouth with his flipper. "Mmh amhhr!!!!!!! Hey! What are you doing???" She said annoyed, pulling his flipper away. "None of your business...What are YOU doing here is the...
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posted by legendary7
Private began to tear up when the two horrified penguins found their bleeding leader laying face down on the ground without any movement. Rico slammed into the door trying to open it.
R: "Skipper! Skipper!"
P: "It's no use, Rico!"
Private wept into his flippers. Rico had to think of something. Then it hit him. Private looked over to Rico who was now spitting up various weapons. Finally Rico snatched a stick of dynamite from his pile of reguriated ammo.
R: "Kaboom"
P: "Rico, no-"
It was too late rico had already blown up the door. A fog of dust seperated them from the walk-in fridge. Just when they...
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Ok i know this is my second one for the day, but its valentines day! i think this is just a one-shot.

"UP and adam MEN!" Skipper yelled at the top of his lungs. "Ahhh!!!" Private and Starlite screamed, he fell out of his bunk. And Starlite fell out of her hammock, as she rose, she pulled out a bow and arrow and pointed it to Skipper, they all froze. "Morning guys! Ha-" Marlene was cut off at the shock of seeing Starlite pointing an arrow at her. One at her, one at Skipper. "i knew you were out to get me." Skipper said putting his flippers up. "No, i'm not...But CUIPED is! Happy valentines day...
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posted by skipper12a
Ans for those who hadn't read my latest story, "The Reverse World" yet, here's the next part of my current story!

Chapter 5: Penguins always have a plan!
(back in the penguin HQ)
SK: Lunchtime, everyone! You're free to do whatever you want, as long as it doesn't involve permanent injuries, deaths, mutations, et cetera. That means you, Kowalski and Rico.
SH: Great, now's our chance! Into the lab!
(Kowalski, Private and Sherry all go into Kowalski’s lab)
PR(Kowalski): Wow, I didn't even need an excuse!
KW(Private): He wasn't even looking, Kowalski.
SH: Let's take a look at the machine... Wow, it looks...
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Death By Chocolate
Yield: 12 servings.


Ingredients
8 oz (225 g) dark semisweet chocolate (40-50% cocoa)
2/3 cup (140 g) butter
1 cup (210 g) sugar
4 eggs
4 heaped tablespoons (1 dl) all-purpose flour
4 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1½ teaspoon baking powder or 1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
4 tablespoons sour cream


Ingredients for frosting
2/3 cup (1.6 dl) heavy cream or whipping cream
9 oz (260 g) semisweet chocolate (40-50% cocoa)



Method
1.Preheat oven to 350 deg F (Gas mark 4 or 180 deg C).
2.Line a circular 10 inch (25 cm) cake tin (3 inches tall) with grease proof or other...
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posted by SkippX101
All the penguins went to their stations. Private with Mort, Kowalski with Maurice, Rico guarding the HQ and (on private's orders) Skipper with Marlene."Ehhh, why don't i get a bodily guard to? I am the King, i should have the biggest and most strongest Bodily-guard of all time!" King Julian orderd while sitting on his throne. "As i just explained.And i do fear you have memory loss, you have alresdy been captured by Blowhole before, so you are the least of our worries." Kowalski said with his arms at the back of his back. "*sigh* FINE!! But afterwards i want a body guard. No, a booty-guard!Yess,...
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Here's a link to the original song: link

And now, the parody:

V1. I know a tropical island where the lemurs roam and the bright sun shines.
And on this tropical island, there vacayed four friends of mine.
Sometimes they fish in the water, sometimes they slide on the land.
Sometimes they like to play volleyball and cover each other in sand.
Chorus: They are caribbean arctic avians, they like to fish in the tropical sea. Caribbean arctic avians, penguins in a coconut tree.
V2. The fish, the sharks, and the lemurs, they've seen them fight by where the pineapple grows.
They like to see all of the...
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“MARLENE!!” Skipper screamed as he pushed Marlene away from the incoming danger. BAM! “I got him Sissle!” said the man with a bulky feature. “Very good, Brick. Let’s get out of here before someone else sees us.” Said the man named Sissle. “What about the rat?” Brick was referring to Marlene. “Like I said, Brick. They are just dumb animals. These birds just got lucky in outsmarting us.” Sissle replied. “You shouldn’t have meddled with us in robbing that diamond necklace.” “We’re glad we came across you-.” He motioned Brick to throw the cage to the ground over...
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posted by EppofangirlXD
Skilight, chapter 2, by mutated-ducks-rule and EppogirlXD.

----

A light green meadow, covered by thousands of pure white daises. Fluffy, cotton candy clouds whisked across the sky. This place was beautiful. The only problem was that I had no idea where I could possibly be.

"Hello?" I called out. The only response I heard was a sigh. A long and aggravated one too.

I slowly turned around. There, a lone figure was standing ten feet away from me. "Can I help you?" I asked, not quite sure how to handle this situation.

The figure shook his head and started to slowly retreat. Before completely vanishing...
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Private: Ouch! Stupid Mouse trap!
Kowalski: Oww!
Skipper: Wow I never thought it would be this painful.
Rico: afqagwsagbsdgb
Skipper: You're right, Rico.
Private: But wouldn't that be cheating?
Skipper: Okay fine. Forget the x-ray vision goggles, Rico.
Kowalski: Skipper, take a look at this map Gravin gave us. Notice how these trees right here form the shape of an iphone?
Skipper: I see where you're going with this. Lets go, team!
Somewhere in the forest.....
Po: Hey Tigress, have you met Skipper yet? He's awesome!
Tigress: No, Po. Let's just be focused on finding the blue apple, huh?
Po: Fine....
In the...
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posted by alexrusso-213
Alex:wow that penguin is tall! I feel so short (starts to fake cry)
Harry:al your 14 and u look like ur 12 that's great compare to that tall penguin
Kowalski:well I be!
Alex:that penguin just talk!
Skipper:Kowalski!
Alex:so did that one whoa
Skipper:alright men plan B (the use a bomb to out them to sleep....................at the lair Harry,Alex,Mars,Ron,and hermione were in a net Harry and alex were in one mars was in another and Ron and hermione were in another
Alex:LET US OUT OF HERE!!!!! @&$%#
Harry:Alex don't swear
Private:please don't
Alex:sorry-gasp talking penguin
Rico:jahdhjshdd
Everyone:what?
Private:he said that our leader is coming
Alex: i am not scared of him
(skipper came out)
Alex:wow I don't see much
posted by theWOLFPACK15
Royal Pains
Chapter 1: Late

We zoom into the Central Park zoo and head inside the Penguin's habitat to see Skipper pacing back and forth, holding his cup of fish coffee. "She's late. This is the second time that she has been scheduled to come and train." He looks over at Kowalski." Kowalski, give me one reason why we let her join the team"

Quickly, the strategist took out his notes "Well, Skipper, because with out our time raising her she would of been left for dead in the middle of winter, and Private did not want that to happen. Soon you-"

Skipper had a bored expression on his face."Yeah, I know...
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Re-submission and edit of my old favorite, 7 abominations.
Skilene, but not too much. Has Oc's.
Prolouge:The Mystery
The sky was blue, and the dark autumn rainbow commandeered the green of the leaves, yet the edge summer was fighting back with it's greatest weapon: heat.
More heat than all the animals in the nearby zoo could take, including the Madagascar faring penguin four.The exhausted penguins had waved to the small crowd of sweaty visitors all day.Routine was routine, whether it was hot or cold, a penguins duty must be performed.
" Cute..and cuddly boys..." Skipper repeated the old mantra,...
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posted by alexrusso-213
Me:so u know nothing at all
Lina:no
Doon:sorry no
Me:u must fell terbblie
Lina:not really
Me:WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
skipper:Alex it's not there falut
Me:so!?
Private:well would u like to came up with us?
Me:we just got here?
Kowalski:ALEX!
Me:sorry
(up there)
Me:ta-da!
Lina:what's that?
Me:the 
Doon:the what?
Me:oh god
(Skipper's POV)
me:Alex are u sure
Alex:yes
Lina:oh my what's that's
Kowalski:it's a fox
Doon:wow
(Lina's POV)
me:so Alex do u like anyone
Alex:no
Lina:oh I sort of like Doon
posted by Grimms-Dragon
It's been a long time and there are stories that need updating, but a lot has been happening so please excuse all of the hold up. I'm working. Credit goes to Marilyn Manson for the song, as do all the other artist that may or may not be used.

This originally was not intended to be a slash fiction, or any pairing for that matter, but I decided it would entertain you guys more, and help me build on the story, since I write romance better.

THIS DAY AND AGE

BY THE YOUNG AND FREE DRAGON

I can tell you what they say in space
That our earth is too grey
But when the spirit is so digital
The body acts this...
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posted by hahahaidontcare
HIIII!!!!!!! Someone suggested that I should write a part 2 of FANGIRL ATTACK. So here goes!

"OH MY GOD!!!!!" Skipper screamed. "He proposed Doris to a date!!!!! Our Kowalski is getting destroyed by fangirls!!!!!"
"Hi Skipper."
"Marlene!"
"Hi, I just heard you scream about something."
"Uh.... um........."
"What?"
"ZOO IDOL!!!!"
"Come on. That's a really good show."
"Not if your well... friend is getting destroyed by fangirls and asked out by the prettiest dolphin in the zoo."
Skipper shuddered.
"Okay. Fine. I know how you feel. Here's my plan:
We get rid of the fangirls but let Kowalski go out with Doris."
"That sounds like a good plan!!"
"Come on! What are we waiting for? Let's go!"
Skipper and William began to walk around New York's Central Park, just a way to have something to do. "Look, we're in the District," said William, pointing at a small lamp post. "Look here, I'm not trying to make you look dumb, but that's a lamp post," said Skipper. "No, it's the District, look...." pointed William. Skipper then looked closely at the lamp post, then it shone brilliantly and beamed at their feet, soon after, several human ghosts, all in army uniforms, began to march off to the light's beam. "These be all the men and women that have died for humanity's greed for the black menace,...
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posted by skipperfan5431
"Skipper! Can you help me get this stupid cotton candy off my back?" Lilly asked, poking her head out the door again. Skipper looked back, "I would Lilly, but I have to discuss the plan with the boys. Rico! Assist Lilly please." Skipper replied, sending Rico to the bathroom. "Wait.....what th--" Before Lilly could protest, Rico pushed her in the bathroom and closed the door.
-------------------------------------------------
THE NEXT MORNING!!!!!!!
Julien watched the penguins closely as they did their morning aerobics. "Maurice, how is our hilarious trick coming along?" He asked deviously. "Not...
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