First off, I'm SUPER pissed at my dad. He never wants to listen to me. And that's especially hard since I'm a girl and he technically will never understand me. When I try to get his attention to something he brushes it off, like it never even happened. But most of the time, he's just caught up in work, only worrying about work. He hardly has any time for us anymore. Maybe because of the fact that he probably, secretly, always wanted a son. That's how he sees me. As some sort of guy that can take anything and has to fight amd fend for herself.
Well guess what dad, this isn't the 1980's. This isn't like back in the day whem someone called you ugly, you would punch their eye or become a bully and hang out with the bad crew in school. Sure my dad chose a good path and married the woman of his dreams(I think) and has a nice job. But, he's the biggest adult bully I've ever seen.
Now, when it's the weekend, I see it as a time to relax and soak in all the free time off school. But my dad decides it's a time for brutal work and more frustration. Every Saturday or Sunday afternoon, he goes out and works out on the lawn cutting trees, tearing down weeds, and sculpting out the lawn to make it look as good as our refurbished neighbors.
He also, takes it as a time to be able to work EVEN more at home. All he does is sit by the computer and type away at emails all day. He also has this sort of Facebook obsession, but I won't get into that, although I might say that he found a lot of woman "friends" and it makes my mom rage with a bit of jealousy.
Now here's the reason why I'm REALLY pissed.
So there I am, playing Kingdom Hearts on my Playstation 2, when he comes storming in after going to the store with my mom. It was my only day available to play all that I wanted, yet my dad hates. Normally, he'd just be like, "not again" and just sulk in a corner until I've found a save point and turned off the Playstation. But, NO, he just waltzed in and screamed at me,"TURN OFF THE PLAYSTATION NOW! please." At first I didn't want to because I was in the middle of a gummi ship travel and was fighting off Heartless vessels (Kingdom Hearts players, you know what I'm talking about). Because I have a throat virus that hasn't gone away for weeks, I sounded like an old man fighting for the last glass of prune juice they were serving at the high schoo's 25th Reunion.
Anyways, after we had fought for about 5 seconds, he just went all out and turned off the Playstation. Little did he know that you have to press the button for a while to get the whole thing turned off. So the game was starting up again. He then screamed at me to turn it off completely. I was playing dumb and told him,"I don't know how to turn it off." When my nosy butted in and said,"Yes, you do!" So then I decided to take my time in turning off the Playstation. Then my dad got even more frustrated and said,"That's it! I'm going to take away your Playstation game time and this game until you earn it back,"(sooner or later I'll find it in his room or forgotten on the kitchen table/bar table). He then struggled with the Playstation for about 10 seconds(which was really funny from my point of view) and forcibly, yanked the game out, put it in the case, and set it down beside his computer.
That's when I exploded. I told him that I hadn't played for a whole 6 days and that I earned the time for playing Kingdom Hearts. He just didn't want to hear it. He just randomly counteracted my thought with the lie that I had played all week. I thought that was bullshit(excuse me for my language I'm just really mad) because not once had I touched the Playstation or even looked at the game until this day. He then said I was bullheaded and that where I got all that rage and being able to attack someone with an argument like that. I kept telling him over the years that I had gotten it from him, but he thinks I got it from my mom (which is a total LIE).
He then just said for me to stop crying(because I really LOVE Kingdom Hearts ever since I firat played it because of how wonderful and beautiful the story was crafted), mostly because this was the second time I burst out tears in months because I was "disciplined" to be good and to stick up for myself and not be weak. I bet my dad thinks I'm a total wuss puss now since I cried in front of him. Now he just says he's going to dodge and ignore me completely. Um, hello,dad don't you already do that before?
Anyways, he was like this to my mom. He never helped at all with me or my sister as we were growing up, he just wanted us to get good grades so we could leave the house faster and go to a good college probably because he always told us that he wanted me and my sister to pay for his retirement and to buy and old vintage car that pollutes the air and kills all living things. If I even just get an A, he goes all out and gives me a long speech on how I can do better. I'm barely hanging on to an A in almost all of my classes except for Geometry (I really suck in that). And he always tells my mom to shut up when she's trying to discuss something with him. He's made my mom cry multiple times and made her run for her room and lock the door just so he won't be able to get in and sleep in the extra beds we have in the guest's room.
My point is, that my dad is no different than any other guy in the street. He's too proud to deal with women problems and too chicken to even discuss something like feelings. He never listens to me, or my mom (strangely to my sister but that;s because she's act like him and is on his side of the family), and he comes up with a lie just so he can get his own way in something. And he thinks himself so young, that he has permission to hang out with any if his hag friends behind my mom's back.
You know what's strange, a couple of years ago, when I was 3, my dad and I had made a promise. He told me that in someway, I would never grow up and always be his little girl. Well things change dad. People change, you changed. As I was growing up, I was starting to see the real you, and I think that I see you now for who you really are. A bully. As in someone who can't live up to life's expectations and lives in the past too often. Somehow he managed to marry a nerd (who was my mom) and redeem himself a little, but not by much. So, in the end, I'm PISSED at my dad for taking away my Kingdom Hearts game. >:(
I NOT HAS A PMS!!!!! - k.
Giggle Giggle went the lad’s,
For they were doing something bad,
What they were holding in their hands,
Oh, it was not the building plans!
Leaders of the building team,
Oh - so - sensible they seemed,
But what nobody else did see,
Was making them chuckle with glee!
One of them looked over his shoulder,
One of the men, the picture holder,
Just to make absolutely sure,
No one thought them immature.
When he saw the coast was clear,
Once more at the picture did he peer,
And I’m sure by now you’re aware,
Exactly what that man saw there!
