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posted by Usui--takumi
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His troops, led by four of his finest commanders wona great battle for him, and Napoleon Bonaparte was in a generous mood.
“Ask for anything and I’ll give it to you,” he said to the four officers who had distinguished themselves.
“I’ve always wanted a house in Paris,” said one of the men, a German.
“Done!” said Napoleon. “You’ll get a mansion in the city.”
“I’ve always desired to own a hotel,” said the second officer, a Frenchman.
“Done!” said the emperor. “I’ll order a hotel to be given to you.”
“I’ve always wanted a brewery,” said the third man, a Pole.
“Done!” said the emperor. “I will give you a brewery!”
“And you, sir?” he said, turning to the fourth man. “What will you have?”
“Grant me a fortnight’s leave,” said the man.
“Done!” said the emperor. “Your leave begins from tomorrow!”
Now the fourth man happened to be a Jew, and in those days at least, Jews were supposed to be shrewd and possess great business acumen.
So his colleagues were surprised that he had asked for so little. They felt he had missed a rare opportunity to become rich, and were elated that they themselves had kept their wits about them and asked for worthwhile things.
They asked him about it when they ran into him later that day.
“Why did you ask for so little?” they taunted him. “Did courage fail you?”
“You asked for a lot,” replied the Jew. “But you must remember that the emperor is a busy man. He will order his secretary to fulfill his promises. His secretary too is a busy man. He will pass on the order to his assistant who too is a busy man. So the emperor’s order will go down from subordinate to subordinate and finally in the course of a few months…it’ll get lost!”
“We’ll appeal to the emperor!” shouted the Frenchman.
“The emperor will not know what you’re talking about,” said the Jew. “By then our great victory will have become a dim memory. You should have asked for something that the emperor could give immediately – like I did. Now, if you’ll excuse me gentlemen, I have work to do.”
And leaving the three officers gaping, the Jew went off to arrange for his holiday.
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Chapter One
A Slight exaggeration
Mr Higgins was one of those people you just didn’t want to annoy – you know the type. Ever met someone like that? If so you’ll be familiar with my situation. Like I said, you just didn’t want to cross Mr Higgins. When he was angry, he made sure everyone knew about it - like the time he broke the door. Jenny had asked for an eraser. Big mistake. He went berserk! He gave Mark a zero in a history test because Mark had forgotten to brush his teeth. But that was nothing. He threw a board rubber across the classroom at Tom; Tom ducked, so it hit the computer...
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posted by kinga10111
Your right lung is smaller than your left lung to make room for your heart.

No piece of square dry paper can be folded more than 7 times in half!

A group of geese on the ground is a gaggle, a group of geese in the air is a skein!

Over 2500 left handed people a year are killed from using products made for right handed people!

There are more than 10 million bricks in the Empire State Building!

If you counted 24 hours a day, it would take 31,688 years to reach one trillion!

Taphephobia is the fear of being buried alive!

A crocodile always grows new teeth to replace the old teeth!

The sun is 330,330 times...
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posted by 2dolphn97
Ok this is what i do when i like a boy so just saying NOT AN EXPERT!if some of you do the same thing say so in your comments. if this helps you guys, GREAT! if anyone has any questions most likely i will be more than happy to help ok here it goes.....ps dont make fun of my spelling ok NOW here it goes.....
1)i twirl my hair between my fingers
2)i constantly look at them (corner of my eye not ful-on-makes-you-think-im-a-stalker-chick look)yet when they are talking to me i act shy and look at their shoes
3)i laugh even when they're jokes are stupid
4)i get real nervous when they are around and act...
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