(This is a new series I made. I basically review ANYTHING while staying on topic, talking like I'm the f**king son of Sir Issac Newton, and making terrible jokes I came up with in 5 seconds. Hope you enjoy!)

You know what, I have to say it. SCREW HUMANITY AND THEIR DEFORMED OPINIONS. Yeah, I acknowledge that society as we know it is bound to disagree with anyone here and there, but when you break the boundaries and go as far to say that a song like this sucks, then your soul has failed miserably on a vast scale.

Yes reader, I am reviewing a classic song that nobody on this pathetically constructed planet actually has even a bit of a fetish for, Cotton Eye Joe. Specifically the Rednex remix.

But this article will be more of a brief summary of my opinion on it, and not exactly a review, so preserve that thought in your human brain when inspecting this article.

Also I fathom that the crowd in the comments below is going to think I use Google to shamelessly asset smart words for this review, but I digress. Also, again, the haters and trolls can go screw themselves, along with their irregular conceptions.

I use a thesaurus you imbecile. (No offense, this series is meant to be a satirical take on reviews, so I never mean harm or hate when I say stuff like that.)

Blockhead.

But without further ado, literally that line being the utmost cliche sentence I could've possibly said for this review, it's time to take a gander at the song Cotton Eye Joe.

And yes, I am aware that this isn't the 60's Miguel, so reserve your mindless troll comments to your overly complicated human brain.

But straight to the point, I have a huge fetish for this song. And I am aware that song reviewing master ShadowTodd doesn't methodically agnate this piece of music, but as a colossal majority of trolls and haters can't comprehend, it's alright to have an opinion.

Because the aforementioned melody is honestly really catchy! Solemnly, this melody has approximately everything a wonderfully memorable melody needs to have, and I simply adore it!

From the wonderful material inside of the chorus line to the insanely catchy notes, this song is damn near flawless. My favorite version being this one.

link

I can't even justify my indicated opinion previously mentioned about 3 paragraphs ago, the melody discriminately has this haunting pitch to it that attracts me like a moth to a flame, and the chorus line gets me every time.

FINAL SCORE: An exceedingly underrated song. 9/10