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posted by Windwakerguy430


So back when I was talking about Bloodborne on this list, I mentioned how there was one game by FromSoftware that just couldn’t beat this one, and unless you’ve been living under a rock for the passed ten years, then you will know that game is Dark Souls, the first one, of course.
Dark Souls is set in the medieval kingdom of Lordran, and you play as the Chosen Undead, one of the many who have been sent to this dying land in a world where people cannot die. Your goal is to collect the souls of the four ancient lords who ruled this land and use them to either rekindle the First Flame and keep the Age of Fire going or let it die and allow the Age of Dark to come and give power to mankind. The world of Dark Souls was the first to usher in what I have been seeing a lot in medieval fantasy games nowadays, that being that they are darker and more gritty. Sure, Dark Souls was inspired by Berserk, but everything is inspired by something, isn’t it? Everything from the destroyed town of the Undead Burg to the creepy atmosphere of the Duke’s Archives to the walking skeletons found in the Tomb of the Giants. And that’s just a few examples. A lot of places in this game feel like they were once grand locations to explore, but have now fallen to ruin due to the end of the world coming to this kingdom. It’s fascinating to read up on the lore of these places and the enemies and characters within them. Like how the magic users in the Duke’s Archives are actually kidnappers that steal maidens for Seath’s experiments or how the demons of this game all originate from one level thanks to one boss birthing them out. And the bosses in this game are incredible. Sure, not all of them are amazing, like Bed of Driving Me Fucking Mad, but for the most part, bosses like the massive Iron Golem, the giant wolf Sif, and the brilliant fight between Ornstein and Smough, these all are grand fights, leaving you at the mercy of these hulking foes, all of them once something amazing, now fallen to either madness and the desire to kill, or protecting something from you so that you don’t do something reckless in their eyes. And I should mention that this game is in fact hard for newcomers. It was advertised that you will die a lot in this game, and they were right about that. But when you learn what to do, it becomes easier. And it’s reward to learn the mechanics of this game, from item usage, to timing when to attack, dodge, or block in a boss fight. The game rewards perfect playing and doing so will save your ass on several occasions. And the score of this game is amazing. Not on the level of Dark Souls III grand soundtrack, but there are moments where this game amazes me. From your first time entering the kingdom of Anor Londo, to the time you enter Ash Lake and hear that ominous choir. And the final boss theme is so… not amazing, and I mean that in a good way. It’s slow, and kind of sad. And I love it so much.
Dark Souls was the kind of game I needed. In a decade where I was so bored with modern games, even ready to give up on modern games entirely, Dark Souls came to peak my interest in video games again and to get me excited to try out new games. Dark Souls does not hold your hand. It’ll beat you again and again. But like a girl in a Tyler Perry movie, no matter how many times Dark Souls kicks my ass, I’ll always come back for more. Only Dark Souls beats me out of love. And I’m kind of a masochist, so that’s just a turn on to me anyway
posted by Windwakerguy430
Wind: (Sits on a plane, as he see’s people watching nothing but romantic comedies on the plane)


Wind: (Sits on a bus, as he hears people constantly looking around, playing Chokaman Move.


Wind: (Walks down the sidewalk, seeing the streets lined with protesters against Ronald Dump victory in the election)


Wind: (Walks onto the campus of Clearwater University) Oh boy, not even on campus yet, and I already feel like this place is gonna be just like Eastwood. At least I’ll feel right at home


College Administrator: You’ve got what it takes, kid. You’ve got talent, determination, and lots of guts....
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Song: link

Saten Twist: Who wants to take a look at my new chain saw?
Tim: *Points his gun at Saten Twist* Sir, put the chain saw down.
Saten Twist: What for?
Tim: You killed four other ponies with it.
Orion: I can't go one minute without being interrupted.
Tim & Saten Twist: Sorry.
Tim: *Arrests Saten Twist*
Orion: Our final two shows for the night are...

On The Block - Rated TV-PG13
Gran Turismo - Rated TV-PG

Orion: Enjoy.

Welcome to the block, where a group of ponies that are friends live on the same block in Ponyville. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering*...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
Sonic: Huh… I wonder what this speed boost does (Steps on the boost and is launched down the street) Wow! I can go extra fast! Hmmm.
(1 Hour Later)
Sonic: (Sets up an entire set of speed boosts) Alright, let’s go (Steps on the speed boosts and runs super fast, but soon ends up running too fast) (Sonic runs down the street)
Tails: Hey, So- (Sonic runs past him, tearing off Tails’s flesh and leaving his bones)
Sonic: (Runs down the street, destroying vehicles and buildings) (Sonic runs around the entire world multiple times in seconds, destroying cities and killing millions) (Sonic finally...
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For those of you wondering what I think the greatest game of 2015 was, since everyone on the planet seems to be talking about it, I would have to say that the best game of that year had to be the groundbreaking masterpiece….. Alone in the Dark: Illumination. Oh, and Undertale was a great game to. So, since I obviously can’t review Illumination, we will just have to go with Undertale, as requested by Alinah_09. So, let us not waste anymore time (Then again, you’re reading a review by me)
Undertale is a game created by Toby Fox, who also worked on….. Uh….. All I know is that he worked...
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posted by Windwakerguy430
~Story~

In 2275, Earth has become known as the NightLight Planet, as Amethyst City’s thousands of neon signs makes the city extremely bright, making it almost as bright as the sun. This became a beacon for other races on other planets to find Earth and see it’s culture and people. This soon lead to the discovery of alien life on other planets, and it was soon revealed that aliens behave like humans do, with well paying jobs, a perfect economy, a justice system, and similar reproduction methods. However, like humans, some aliens were involved in gang violence, robbery, trafficking, and assassinations....
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Quite some time later.

Rick, Daryl and Oscar sneaked into Woodbury, but first they had to sneak past a guy in his own house.

Rick, in a rare moment of intelligence, had an idea saying "I have a quarter in my pocket.. Maybe if I throw it, he might go investigate the noise and we could sneak away.. Not even use violence".

"Good idea.. Quick Rick. Reach into your pocket" Daryl insisted.

Rick reached into his pocket, but forgotten his own idea as he said "I don't know where your going with this".

Rick pulled an out quarter out of his pocket.

"Hey! A quarter!" Rick cried happily.

"Quick Rick, Throw it...
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You died…. What else do you want. You just died… Okay, fine. You then met me, God, of course. Who else is going to narrate this story? Anyway, You came to me and said, “Who are you”?
I said, “I am God”?
And You said, “So… you’re Sonic.EXE”.
And I said, “... You’re a special kind of stupid”.
And You just sat there like a moron. Anyway, I then said, “Well, anyway, I am the actual God, the creator of the world, and so on and so forth. And you’re dead. You got in a bad car accident. Smashed your ribs, which mutilated you from the inside. Real gross. Blood everywhere. The...
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posted by Canada24
Well.. That's all I got for the story. So.. Here's a BEST OF RICK:

RICK: (first time seeing zombie) My god.. SHE'S SO DRUNK!

RICK: (to Merle while chaining him to pipe) I'm saving you. From yourself.. Look here Merle. When you been a "stripper" as long as I have you know when you met a bad egg.. And your a bad egg.

RICK: (sees the horse he was ridding get eaten and begins freaking out by acting like a gorilla).

RICK: The kid needs surgery on his leg.

RANDELL: But I'm fin-

RICK: (shoots Randell in the kneecap) See.. It's getting worse.

RICK: By Morgan, hope you never try to kill me in the future.

FUTURE:...
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Detective Smith: The London Homicide series 1-5

Episode 1: The Blood Bandit


January 4th 12:32 PM London Train Station

The large train came to a halt at the railroad in the town. The weather was dark and cloudy, as it was mostly these days. Joseph, a young scholar onboard the train, exited it. He examined the station, and looked around. It was a very quiet and quite dull area. Not much seemed to happen, as people walked off and headed to for their destinations. Joseph let out a sigh and walked over to a man wearing a top hat, with an odd looking moustache.
Joseph said, “Excuse me, sir, do you...
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Today, I will be reviewing Sonic.EXE 2. Well, how is it. Well, lets just say second verse same as the first.... In other words, IT SUCKS.
So, it is about these two detectives, Derek and Chelsea who, oddly, are brother and sister. So, they are investigating this crime about this killer who rips open peoples mouth and carves a number into there chest. The only evidence is a busted computer with the Sonic.EXE game downloaded on it... and let me remind you, they were able to find this on a fucking broken computer.
Anyway, Chelsea starts acting weird and Derek comes to the conclusion that Chelsea...
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Now, I love Red Dead Redemption. It has an amazing open world, lots of activities to do, and a large amount of colorful characters. However, there is one character shrouded in mystery. So mysterious that he is only known as the Stranger.
Now, with an odd character like the Stranger, there were many theories that came up of who he is. There are many theories, but the highest three are that the Stranger is Death, Satan, or God. Now, here's what I think. He is not Death, because well, Death only wants to take people to the next life, nothing else. So, the fact of him being Death is invalid.
But,...
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Link: (Wakes up) Huh, what happened
King of Red Lions: Oh, Link, good thing your safe. After your Pokemon burned down that building, I got you out of there
Link: Huh (Sees Tetra) Holy shit, did me and Tetra-
King of Red Lions: No
Link: Goddamn it
King of Red Lions: Anyway, we need to go to the sacred realm again, because............. Well, lets go (Goes through portal)

King of Red Lions: Well, here we are
Link: (Breathes for air) Why the fuck didn't you warn me
King of Red Lions: I can't help it. I'm a boat. I don't even have lungs. Anyway, just go in there, and take Tetra
Tetra: (Wakes up) Did someone...
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Now, let’s talk about Resident Evil….. I love Resident Evil. I love them almost all of them. I love the first one, the second, the third, especially the fourth, Code Veronica, Zero, Revelations one and two, and even Umbrella Chronicles. Resident Evil 5 and 6 were stupid in my eyes, though. And don’t get me started on Operation Raccoon City. But, with that said, there are still great Resident Evil games. And if there is one good thing about them all, it’s the monsters in them. Resident Evil has many great monsters, even the bad ones. And today, I want to share with you all the monsters...
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You know what trend I’m getting kinda tired of? The whole “Princess has been kidnapped, go save her”. I’m not an extremist feminist, but the whole princess thing is kinda getting old. So, naturally, I felt the best thing to do was to make a list of the top ten best. So, the rules for this list are as followed. Only from games that I have played, and only one game per franchise. So, with all of that said and done, let us start the list

#10: Princess Daphne from Dragon’s Lair



Okay…….. This is a bit hard to get behind. What, in the name of god, is this princess wearing. I mean…...
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Scrappy Doo
Scrappy Doo
Hey, everyone. Windwakerguy430 here… and I did some looking around. After my Top Ten Hated Characters in Cartoons and my Top Ten Hated Characters in Anime lists, I noticed that there are a LOT more hated characters in cartoons and anime. So, I decided to make another list. The rules are simple. Rule 1, The characters have to be from shows I watched. Rule 2, only one character per show. Rule 3, I will try to add as little anime characters as I can. And Rule 4, no characters from past lists. With that, lets start.

#15: Scrappy Doo fro, Scooby Doo - Wow, the most hated character on other peoples...
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Alright, everyone, after getting a feel for the game and after being able to experience it at my own friends home, and after hundreds of Youtubers have played it, and after many old fans are still angry over it despite them wanting the franchise to go back to their horror roots, I will be talking about Capcom’s new horror game. It may have taken a long time to get to it, and it may have made people saltier than the Pacific Ocean, but it’s finally time I talk about this game. Let us all take a look at the return to horror game, Resident Evil 7: Biohazard



So as you can see, this game...
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I remember when I was a kid, my older brother had the original Animal Crossing on the Gamecube, and I thought it looked like a babies toy. What is this? This ain’t Smash Melee. Get this outta my face. But now, as someone who got to experience the joy through Animal Crossing: New Leaf, I now understand perfectly. Oh, and also, yes, I did search up Animal Crossing porn for that joke. And it sure as shit wasn’t worth it.
Animal Crossing New Leaf follows the villager, you, as he goes to whatever town you want to call it. Call it Bonerland, call it Fortnite, call it Yabba-Dab, whatever....
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posted by Windwakerguy430


So I played the original NieR some time ago. I liked what I did play, but never got to experience it enough to form a definitive opinion, but man, was that combat not the best. If it was just a little refined, I could like it more… And then Platinum Games came along. And that’s the transition to start talking about NieR: Automata.
So, when it came to the top ten, I thought it would be hard for any game to just break the top ten so easily. Most of my top ten favorite games are games I have cherished memories with. But NieR: Automata, I have no nostalgia for, and yet it managed to break...
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posted by Windwakerguy430


Another Tim Schaffer game on the list and only so long after I just talked about Brutal Legend. I am aware that Schaffer games have a really weird style of creativity and humor to them and are always meant for a more niche demographic. And I am in that demographic. That said, this is Psychonauts, a game to kinda break the mold of the niche… maybe. Probably. Not really.
Psychonauts follows the character Rasputin, or Raz for short, who is a Psychonaut in training, special agents who use the power of their mind to do incredible powers. With these powers, Raz has to stop a conspiracy in...
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So a friend of mine got me thinking the other day, who would win in a battle? An immortal demon who can stop the fabric of time itself, or a blue little bitch who's got some burners on him?

...Needless to say, the victor wasn't Sonic. But then I started thinking to myself. I came up with an idea. An awful idea. An awful, awful, awful idea!

*Insert Obligatory Grinch Image Here*

But in all seriousness, I'm here to end the debate once and for all. To see who would TRULY win in a DEATH BA-

BE QUIET! You wanna get sued, kid?

Uhhh. in a....BATTLE OF DEATH! Yeah, that's it. Thanks man!

Anytime, mate.
Anytime, mate....
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