1. The DP Article post that claimed to be me (now deleted) is obviously not me as those are not my views at all, it is a stereotype of something they are accusing me of that is not true. I don't talk like that at all either and I am shocked anyone could have believed that it was me.
2. Anyone who actually cares enough to read the whole story can refer to my real “About Me” articles where I clearly talk about my mixed racial background and how my abusive childhood has shaped my views. I talked about how I associated “Stepford” with embracing femininity which I was taught by my mother to reject. In one of those articles, I had also offered a clear apology for any offense I had made to anyone and offered an open-minded approach to hearing anyone out who was willing to debate with me and try to change my opinions. I clearly stated that I knew some of my opinions might be harsh due to my background and that I had come here to meet some positive female role models since the ones in my life had been so negative. I clearly stated I wanted to meet women here who could change my opinion. Some users took me up on the offer while others chose to remain close-minded and hateful towards me despite a sincere apology and offer to listening to their opinions. (link) & (link)
3. Whoever did write this article is clearly racist and sexist and left out all facts about me and replaced them with characterizations of how they felt about me. (A) They assumed I am a “skinny pale girl” which is how they are stereotyping White women because pale is associated with sickness, which is negative. (B) They call me a “b***h” repeatedly which is obviously a misogynistic term. (C) They assumed I have a “skinny frame” because they are again stereotyping White women. (D) The assumption made by this user saying “if they are not pale, skinny, blonde haired, blue-eyed, and beautiful, they cannot call themselves women” is completely racist and sexist and has nothing to do with me. Again it goes to a White stereotype of women from body type, hair color, eye color and attractiveness. This isn’t even in line with my views as conveniently left out: Ariel, Belle, Jasmine and Pocahontas are all in my top beautiful princesses and they do not fit this stereotype this account goes to. (This is a classic example of what many do, they conveniently leave out my comments that go right against these absurd claims that I have never made or they pick and choose statements and take them out of context with my full explanations as ace2000 also pointed out.) (E) This author keeps using Jasmine and Esmeralda only, while neglecting all other races of women – especially Pocahontas, Mulan and Tiana, to say that I am against all “women of color” so this user is belittling all non-White women to just two types of women that don’t even count as their own races genetically. This is not to be rude but to be scientifically accurate; They are ethnicities. Furthermore, I never said anything about them for their skin color; I have a similar skin color as they do.
4. Since my mother was the opposite of a Stepford Wife: abusive, alcoholic, working prostitute, mistress, single mother and diagnosed sociopath; I have explained why I personally gear towards the calm stability that I associate that Stepford-ness with, which I never got to have growing up. I have never pushed this on other women and only asked to be respected as a woman who chooses this for myself. Giving my opinion or perspective is not attacking other women or their choices.
5. I never once said that everyone needed to adhere to not being homosexuality, I advocate for gay marriage and I have multiple family members close to me who were very negatively affected from having to remain in the closet so it is ridiculous that any people would try to make up that I was ever homophobic. I just try to do everything I can to bridge the gap in a way that the two groups don’t have to be so hateful towards each other.
6. I never said there was no middle ground to traditionally feminine and masculine; I merely said that I embrace those rather than reject them. That has nothing to do with abuse by the way, as a victim of child abuse I would not advocate abuse in any way. My father’s family was very traditional and sexist which I did not agree with. I embrace qualities that are traditionally considered feminine and masculine but I do not embrace sexism nor forced gender roles. I simply see some positives that my father’s family had from traditional values that my mother’s family did not have; but I also saw the negatives and extremes that both sides took with each as well. That is why I have always said that I advocated for trying to find a balance between the two, as I mentioned in the “about me” articles.
7. I never once said that any women deserve to be raped, ever.
8. I personally don’t like to wear clothes that would entice other men to look at me, that is my personal choice. I never said that other women couldn’t do it or shouldn’t be allowed to it, I merely said that I do not respect it myself which is why I choose not to do it because I do not like the results of men who look at me if I am dressed that way and I can’t imagine how other women do. This is just from my perspective but it has nothing to do with limiting other women’s choices.
9. I didn’t say gypsies were not virtuous women, I said that their culture does not represent virtuous values as I have read from gypsy women advocating for women’s rights in their own culture. I also said I thought the themes of the film overall were too dark for children which I thought other parents agreed as I noted that Esmeralda had been removed the franchise not disowned by Disney. Again, a classic exaggeration and characterization that is not what I actually said. I also said that the fact that gypsy culture, according to gypsy authors I have read, force women to wear seductive clothing and learn how to objectify themselves for men is upsetting to me because I am not misogynistic. I never said I hated Romani people nor did I call them bad names.
10. The fact that this user posting this article assumes I was beaten my father and forced into an abusive marriage yet still deems it funny and entertaining to make fun of my situation rather than trying to legitimately “get help” as so righteously claimed is really just cruel and hateful. I also find this misogynistic against women who are victims of abuse as this user would rather use that abuse against them rather than advocate for their protection.
11. I have never and would never say that a true worth of a woman is to be abused and that is appalling and repulsive.
12. I am not xenophobic, my great-grandparents are from all around the world and they came here legally so I fully support legal immigration. The fact that I do not like to see illegal immigrants getting a pass in line ahead of those who have sacrificed so much to immigrate legally is not xenophobic at all.
13. I have never once said that men should not be judged or blamed for their behaviors, ever.
14. I never said women do not hold sexual urges, I said most women do not have the sexual urges that most men have. (link)
15. I said I believe that when women dress more modest, it does make them more enigmatic and therefore more alluring overall. That is simply my opinion and I never said that other women have to do this, I merely said that I believe women do benefit from this and I feel that this has been lost on a new generation of women that I fear are too pressured to objectify themselves to get attention.
16. I never said all men are rapists nor that all women cannot be victims. I never said that women were made for the pleasure of men, ever. I do not believe that at all. That is horribly sexist. Again, another lie and caricature that has nothing to do with me because I have never said this stuff.
17. I never abused anyone on this site, I had disagreements with others that they took personally, even when others agreed with my opinion. Hate speech looks like this article, defaming my character and making up things I have never said to try and humiliate and ostracize me just because I have disagreeable opinions (that are not hateful).
18. I didn’t target bohemianb*****h, she targeted me because she clearly harbors racist opinions against White women as shown by her only message to me. My only message in response to her was “I have reported you for breaking the rules.” Because her racist and sexist opinions in that message were clearly in violation of Fanpop standards. That is why she was removed.
19. I never once attacked anyone for being mentally ill, ever.
20. I never said all opinions, no matter how heinous or hurtful, have to be respected. I merely said hate should not be responded to with hate because I do not believe that solves anything. I have met some users on here who have changed my perception, not because they attacked me but because they were so kind in their approach and tried to at least understand where I was coming from and why, even if they did not agree. I loved this approach and wanted to emulate it and encourage others to do it as I thought it would breed more respectful communication and open-mindedness to change opinions rather than just bully people like some of these people are clearly trying to do to me.
21. It is hypocritical that arguments are made to excuse the behavior of anyone who says hateful, racist and/or sexist things against me but to then twist my words and try to frame them as hateful, racist and/or sexist.
22. In the Pocahontas article, I merely tried to defend a user that I thought had his words taken out of context, of which I know how that feels. Clearly I was right because he did not mean his words in any racist manner even though some people had perceived it that way. All I was trying to do was help people see that he was never trying to be racist and that their assessment was inaccurate. I just thought that was the proper thing to do. No one likes being targeted like a Salem Witch Trial hunt.
23. I do not lie about my beliefs. The liberal beliefs that ace2000 quoted me on are all accurate. I said that if ALL partners consent then I think they should have the legal choice of polygamy or prostitution because I believe grown consenting adults should have these choices as long as no one is being forced or harmed. I do not believe my opinions should be legally forced on others. There is a big difference between my personal opinion and the law. Furthermore, I have read many studies that say legalizing prostitution dramatically decreases forced prostitution and sex trafficking as well as lowering the rate of rape and violence for prostitutes along with drug overdoses and suicides. (link) (link) In addition, I have read many studies that find that single parent homes have an uncanny negative impact on children’s well-being (and I have experienced this with my mother and her mother as well.) (link) (link) () So if all of the parents are consenting then I just think that polygamy would benefit the children by having a stable home as opposed to being shipped back and forth between homes like I was growing up. I also advocate for gay adoption because I believe a child’s best change is with more than one parent, regardless of race, sexual orientation or religion.
24. I never condoned cheating in any way, shape or form and these users all conveniently left out the part where I wrote “I admit that I would not be so gracious, but that's why I didn't marry a guy with that kind of problem.” In regards to the cheating husband. Instead of putting her down for her choice, which I see as misogynist, I simply respected that it was her choice – which I would never make for myself – and that she did stay married until death and seemed genuinely happy in photos with her husband. (link)
25. Many men’s rights movements talk about the effect of men committing suicide when they feel they are not able to provide for their families as it makes them feel like a burden and like their families would be better off without them. (link) Again, this is a very serious topic and I wasn't blaming her for making more money but how she treated him after that. The fact is that this specific situation did end up emasculating the husband but again, these users conveniently dismiss the part where I said “It's no wonder this marriage fell apart with Rene wanting to focus solely on goals outside of the home which neglected her husband and children.” I never said she couldn’t make more money than her husband; I merely said that it didn’t help the situation on top of the fact that all of her focus was going into her career so her husband and children also felt alienated from her due to her work schedule. These users left out the fact that I said that I thought her husband never fell out of love with her, which is part of why I was so sad about them getting divorced since he clearly loved her so much. I said she needed to find a balance because her family should still have some focus. Again, I just always think about how these things affect kids because of the way the adults in my childhood always put themselves first and made excuses for themselves about how it impacted me and the other children. (link)
26. Yes, I did create a new account that others have said I have had no controversy with to get away from the bullies who can't seem to stop. This shows that these other users just have hatred and spite towards me and have hounded me all over this site for my different opinions. None of my opinions were threatening or vulgar, unlike theirs which clearly are.
I only created this account because I did not want to let these bullies, who reminded me so much of the abusive women in my childhood, implant any negative associations with women for me. I wanted a way to stay in contact with the kind, nurturing and open-minded women – who ironically enough, just happen to remind me of Stepford Wives since they were always so happy– that were positive female role models to me. Those users had been a positive impact on me and I felt I learned a lot from them, and I didn't want to lose that. I think it’s really sad that the hateful users claim to hate my opinions, yet then work so hard at keeping me from actually being able to change my opinion or have positive experiences with other women by ganging up “Mean Girls” style on me. No apologies or explanations are good enough for them because they just want to choose to hate and try to make others hate me as well. This kind of organized bullying is far worse than any controversial opinions I have ever posted on this site. It is really sad to see how quick and willing people are to jump on someone without ever caring to hear from the actual source or even attempt to understand where they are coming from or why. I wonder how everyone else here would have felt were they in my position, being lied about like this in such a hateful manner over nothing but a difference of opinion.
Even if I was the awful person these people accuse me of being, which I am not, they are clearly no better as they are doing the exact things they accused me of doing. As other users have confirmed, I am not spewing hate; These specific users just hate my opinions and therefore hate me.
2. Anyone who actually cares enough to read the whole story can refer to my real “About Me” articles where I clearly talk about my mixed racial background and how my abusive childhood has shaped my views. I talked about how I associated “Stepford” with embracing femininity which I was taught by my mother to reject. In one of those articles, I had also offered a clear apology for any offense I had made to anyone and offered an open-minded approach to hearing anyone out who was willing to debate with me and try to change my opinions. I clearly stated that I knew some of my opinions might be harsh due to my background and that I had come here to meet some positive female role models since the ones in my life had been so negative. I clearly stated I wanted to meet women here who could change my opinion. Some users took me up on the offer while others chose to remain close-minded and hateful towards me despite a sincere apology and offer to listening to their opinions. (link) & (link)
3. Whoever did write this article is clearly racist and sexist and left out all facts about me and replaced them with characterizations of how they felt about me. (A) They assumed I am a “skinny pale girl” which is how they are stereotyping White women because pale is associated with sickness, which is negative. (B) They call me a “b***h” repeatedly which is obviously a misogynistic term. (C) They assumed I have a “skinny frame” because they are again stereotyping White women. (D) The assumption made by this user saying “if they are not pale, skinny, blonde haired, blue-eyed, and beautiful, they cannot call themselves women” is completely racist and sexist and has nothing to do with me. Again it goes to a White stereotype of women from body type, hair color, eye color and attractiveness. This isn’t even in line with my views as conveniently left out: Ariel, Belle, Jasmine and Pocahontas are all in my top beautiful princesses and they do not fit this stereotype this account goes to. (This is a classic example of what many do, they conveniently leave out my comments that go right against these absurd claims that I have never made or they pick and choose statements and take them out of context with my full explanations as ace2000 also pointed out.) (E) This author keeps using Jasmine and Esmeralda only, while neglecting all other races of women – especially Pocahontas, Mulan and Tiana, to say that I am against all “women of color” so this user is belittling all non-White women to just two types of women that don’t even count as their own races genetically. This is not to be rude but to be scientifically accurate; They are ethnicities. Furthermore, I never said anything about them for their skin color; I have a similar skin color as they do.
4. Since my mother was the opposite of a Stepford Wife: abusive, alcoholic, working prostitute, mistress, single mother and diagnosed sociopath; I have explained why I personally gear towards the calm stability that I associate that Stepford-ness with, which I never got to have growing up. I have never pushed this on other women and only asked to be respected as a woman who chooses this for myself. Giving my opinion or perspective is not attacking other women or their choices.
5. I never once said that everyone needed to adhere to not being homosexuality, I advocate for gay marriage and I have multiple family members close to me who were very negatively affected from having to remain in the closet so it is ridiculous that any people would try to make up that I was ever homophobic. I just try to do everything I can to bridge the gap in a way that the two groups don’t have to be so hateful towards each other.
6. I never said there was no middle ground to traditionally feminine and masculine; I merely said that I embrace those rather than reject them. That has nothing to do with abuse by the way, as a victim of child abuse I would not advocate abuse in any way. My father’s family was very traditional and sexist which I did not agree with. I embrace qualities that are traditionally considered feminine and masculine but I do not embrace sexism nor forced gender roles. I simply see some positives that my father’s family had from traditional values that my mother’s family did not have; but I also saw the negatives and extremes that both sides took with each as well. That is why I have always said that I advocated for trying to find a balance between the two, as I mentioned in the “about me” articles.
7. I never once said that any women deserve to be raped, ever.
8. I personally don’t like to wear clothes that would entice other men to look at me, that is my personal choice. I never said that other women couldn’t do it or shouldn’t be allowed to it, I merely said that I do not respect it myself which is why I choose not to do it because I do not like the results of men who look at me if I am dressed that way and I can’t imagine how other women do. This is just from my perspective but it has nothing to do with limiting other women’s choices.
9. I didn’t say gypsies were not virtuous women, I said that their culture does not represent virtuous values as I have read from gypsy women advocating for women’s rights in their own culture. I also said I thought the themes of the film overall were too dark for children which I thought other parents agreed as I noted that Esmeralda had been removed the franchise not disowned by Disney. Again, a classic exaggeration and characterization that is not what I actually said. I also said that the fact that gypsy culture, according to gypsy authors I have read, force women to wear seductive clothing and learn how to objectify themselves for men is upsetting to me because I am not misogynistic. I never said I hated Romani people nor did I call them bad names.
10. The fact that this user posting this article assumes I was beaten my father and forced into an abusive marriage yet still deems it funny and entertaining to make fun of my situation rather than trying to legitimately “get help” as so righteously claimed is really just cruel and hateful. I also find this misogynistic against women who are victims of abuse as this user would rather use that abuse against them rather than advocate for their protection.
11. I have never and would never say that a true worth of a woman is to be abused and that is appalling and repulsive.
12. I am not xenophobic, my great-grandparents are from all around the world and they came here legally so I fully support legal immigration. The fact that I do not like to see illegal immigrants getting a pass in line ahead of those who have sacrificed so much to immigrate legally is not xenophobic at all.
13. I have never once said that men should not be judged or blamed for their behaviors, ever.
14. I never said women do not hold sexual urges, I said most women do not have the sexual urges that most men have. (link)
15. I said I believe that when women dress more modest, it does make them more enigmatic and therefore more alluring overall. That is simply my opinion and I never said that other women have to do this, I merely said that I believe women do benefit from this and I feel that this has been lost on a new generation of women that I fear are too pressured to objectify themselves to get attention.
16. I never said all men are rapists nor that all women cannot be victims. I never said that women were made for the pleasure of men, ever. I do not believe that at all. That is horribly sexist. Again, another lie and caricature that has nothing to do with me because I have never said this stuff.
17. I never abused anyone on this site, I had disagreements with others that they took personally, even when others agreed with my opinion. Hate speech looks like this article, defaming my character and making up things I have never said to try and humiliate and ostracize me just because I have disagreeable opinions (that are not hateful).
18. I didn’t target bohemianb*****h, she targeted me because she clearly harbors racist opinions against White women as shown by her only message to me. My only message in response to her was “I have reported you for breaking the rules.” Because her racist and sexist opinions in that message were clearly in violation of Fanpop standards. That is why she was removed.
19. I never once attacked anyone for being mentally ill, ever.
20. I never said all opinions, no matter how heinous or hurtful, have to be respected. I merely said hate should not be responded to with hate because I do not believe that solves anything. I have met some users on here who have changed my perception, not because they attacked me but because they were so kind in their approach and tried to at least understand where I was coming from and why, even if they did not agree. I loved this approach and wanted to emulate it and encourage others to do it as I thought it would breed more respectful communication and open-mindedness to change opinions rather than just bully people like some of these people are clearly trying to do to me.
21. It is hypocritical that arguments are made to excuse the behavior of anyone who says hateful, racist and/or sexist things against me but to then twist my words and try to frame them as hateful, racist and/or sexist.
22. In the Pocahontas article, I merely tried to defend a user that I thought had his words taken out of context, of which I know how that feels. Clearly I was right because he did not mean his words in any racist manner even though some people had perceived it that way. All I was trying to do was help people see that he was never trying to be racist and that their assessment was inaccurate. I just thought that was the proper thing to do. No one likes being targeted like a Salem Witch Trial hunt.
23. I do not lie about my beliefs. The liberal beliefs that ace2000 quoted me on are all accurate. I said that if ALL partners consent then I think they should have the legal choice of polygamy or prostitution because I believe grown consenting adults should have these choices as long as no one is being forced or harmed. I do not believe my opinions should be legally forced on others. There is a big difference between my personal opinion and the law. Furthermore, I have read many studies that say legalizing prostitution dramatically decreases forced prostitution and sex trafficking as well as lowering the rate of rape and violence for prostitutes along with drug overdoses and suicides. (link) (link) In addition, I have read many studies that find that single parent homes have an uncanny negative impact on children’s well-being (and I have experienced this with my mother and her mother as well.) (link) (link) () So if all of the parents are consenting then I just think that polygamy would benefit the children by having a stable home as opposed to being shipped back and forth between homes like I was growing up. I also advocate for gay adoption because I believe a child’s best change is with more than one parent, regardless of race, sexual orientation or religion.
24. I never condoned cheating in any way, shape or form and these users all conveniently left out the part where I wrote “I admit that I would not be so gracious, but that's why I didn't marry a guy with that kind of problem.” In regards to the cheating husband. Instead of putting her down for her choice, which I see as misogynist, I simply respected that it was her choice – which I would never make for myself – and that she did stay married until death and seemed genuinely happy in photos with her husband. (link)
25. Many men’s rights movements talk about the effect of men committing suicide when they feel they are not able to provide for their families as it makes them feel like a burden and like their families would be better off without them. (link) Again, this is a very serious topic and I wasn't blaming her for making more money but how she treated him after that. The fact is that this specific situation did end up emasculating the husband but again, these users conveniently dismiss the part where I said “It's no wonder this marriage fell apart with Rene wanting to focus solely on goals outside of the home which neglected her husband and children.” I never said she couldn’t make more money than her husband; I merely said that it didn’t help the situation on top of the fact that all of her focus was going into her career so her husband and children also felt alienated from her due to her work schedule. These users left out the fact that I said that I thought her husband never fell out of love with her, which is part of why I was so sad about them getting divorced since he clearly loved her so much. I said she needed to find a balance because her family should still have some focus. Again, I just always think about how these things affect kids because of the way the adults in my childhood always put themselves first and made excuses for themselves about how it impacted me and the other children. (link)
26. Yes, I did create a new account that others have said I have had no controversy with to get away from the bullies who can't seem to stop. This shows that these other users just have hatred and spite towards me and have hounded me all over this site for my different opinions. None of my opinions were threatening or vulgar, unlike theirs which clearly are.
I only created this account because I did not want to let these bullies, who reminded me so much of the abusive women in my childhood, implant any negative associations with women for me. I wanted a way to stay in contact with the kind, nurturing and open-minded women – who ironically enough, just happen to remind me of Stepford Wives since they were always so happy– that were positive female role models to me. Those users had been a positive impact on me and I felt I learned a lot from them, and I didn't want to lose that. I think it’s really sad that the hateful users claim to hate my opinions, yet then work so hard at keeping me from actually being able to change my opinion or have positive experiences with other women by ganging up “Mean Girls” style on me. No apologies or explanations are good enough for them because they just want to choose to hate and try to make others hate me as well. This kind of organized bullying is far worse than any controversial opinions I have ever posted on this site. It is really sad to see how quick and willing people are to jump on someone without ever caring to hear from the actual source or even attempt to understand where they are coming from or why. I wonder how everyone else here would have felt were they in my position, being lied about like this in such a hateful manner over nothing but a difference of opinion.
Even if I was the awful person these people accuse me of being, which I am not, they are clearly no better as they are doing the exact things they accused me of doing. As other users have confirmed, I am not spewing hate; These specific users just hate my opinions and therefore hate me.
The Danish Lads
