Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: It feels great to be back everypony.
Master Sword: Now we're starting off season 2.
Audience: *Cheers*
Tom: Today's crossover parody, Top Queer.
Audience: *Laughs*
Master Sword: This crossover parody combines Top Gear with Glee.
Audience: *Laughs*
Tom: And begin.

Top Queer

Starring Tom Foolery as Jeremy Clarkson
Master Sword as James May
Saten Twist as Richard Hammond
Mortomis as Will Schuester
Snow Wonder as Sue Sylvester
Cosmic Rainbow as Blaine Anderson
Aina as Rachel Berry
Sunny as Santana Lopez
Blaze as Kurt Hummel

At the Top Gear studio

Audience: *Cheering*
Jeremy: Hello everypony, and thank you for coming. Now, we have a problem.
Richard: We always have a problem.
Jeremy: Well this one is not related to cars.
James: There's a first.
Jeremy: Now the letter I have received here says Dear Top Gear. We hate your theme song, and want to make a new one for you. Signed-

The Glee characters blew a hole through a wall, scaring off all of the audience members.

Sue: Hell yeah, we just did that.
Audience: *Laughing*
James: Well, at least the On The Block audience didn't leave.
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: What do you want?
Will: We want to make a new theme song for you.
Richard: We like our theme song just the way it is, now please leave.
Sue: No.
Richard: I said please, you have to leave.
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: Security!
James: They ran away with the audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: Shit.
Rachel: That's not a nice word to say. We want to help you, and you're being mean.
Jeremy: Since when does it help to blow a hole into our wall?
Audience: *Laughing*
Kurt: You're not being very nice.
Richard: Neither are you assholes!
Santana: What's it gonna take for you to let us create a theme song for you?
Jeremy: A race.
Richard: The three of us against three of you.
Sue: There's only six of us.
Jeremy: Then which one of you six is gay, or lesbian?
Kurt, Rachel, and Santana: *Raises their hooves*
James: Perfect.
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: Then you three can't race.
Santana: *Gasp* Why not?
Rachel: Say you're sorry.
Jeremy: No thanks, but I will do one thing for you. *Punches Rachel*
Audience: *Laughing*
Kurt: You're rude. I'm going to masturbate. *Leaves*
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: And that's why he's not allowed to race.
Richard: Let's continue on.

It was a relay race. Jeremy, Richard, and James against Will, Sue, and Blaine.

Jeremy: One thing that concerns me is that James' car is a Fiat Panda.
Audience: *Laughing*
Richard: We're not going to win.
Jeremy: Okay, the rules are simple. Follow the road, and go as fast as you can in your vehicles.
Others: Okay.

First off was Jeremy against Sue.

Jeremy: *In a Mustang GT500*
Sue: *In a hummer*
Flag Pony: 3. 2.
Jeremy: *Drives off*
Audience: *Laughing*
Sue: That's cheating!
Flag Pony: Shut up. Now I gotta start all the way from 3 again.
Sue: WHAAT?!!?
Audience: *Laughing*
Flag Pony: 3..........
Sue: Hurry up!!!!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Flag Pony: 2..........
Audience: *Laughing*
Sue: Forget this. *Drives away*
Jeremy: *Arrives in his car* Go James!
James: *Driving his car, but it only goes ten miles an hour*
Audience: *Laughing*
Jeremy: I was worried about this.

So Jeremy decided to cheat without anyone noticing.

Jeremy: *Goes to Blaine's Corvette, and lets air leak out one of the tires. He then makes a troll face while sliding away*
Audience: *Laughing*
Blaine: Wait a minute. *Gets out of his car, and sees air coming out of one tire* This is impossible. I need to refill the tire quickly.
Sue: *Arrives* Go Will!
Will: I'm gonna win. *Driving a jeep, but James crashes into his car*
Jeremy: I should have warned you. Part of the track crosses over itself.
Audience: *Laughing*

Jeremy's team won, and all of the Glee fans killed their selves when they heard about this.

The End

On the next part of this episode, a new character appears.

Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on street corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing next to Double Scoop*
Tom: More ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands next to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*

The episode begins with Tom, and Master Sword standing in front of their house.

Tom: There's a new character we'd like to-
Master Sword: Hold everything!
Tom: What is it?
Master Sword: The title of the episode didn't appear.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: You're right, it didn't. Now how is that possible?
Master Sword: I don't know. That's why I'm scared!
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: *Arrives in his car*

Episode 14: The Train Leaves In Five Minutes

Master Sword: Never mind, I see the episode number, and title.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: It's above Saten Twist's car.
Saten Twist: *Gets out of car* Good morning everypony.
Tom: Hey Saten. Do you have the new character for this show?
Saten Twist: I sure do. You remember that grey hedgehog in the Celebrity Jeopardy skits, right?
Master Sword: Yeah.
Tom: Yes.
Saten Twist: Well he's going to make more appearances now. Meet Sean the hedgehog.
Audience: *Cheers*
Sean: *Exits Saten Twist's car* What's going on everybody?
Master Sword: I don't think anything is going on me so far.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: Then who wants to watch a movie?

Ponies came from everywhere to answer his question.

Aina: Yes!
Snow Wonder: I love movies!
Cosmic Rainbow: What are we watching?!?
Sean: Macfarland U.S.E.
Ponies: Yeah!!!!

After the movie

Blaze: That was awesome!
Sean: No. You're awesome!
Tom: Hey. Where did the audience go?
Audience: We're still here!
Tom: Good. Coming up next is Celebrity Jeopardy, so don't go away.
Audience: *Claps*

Our cast for this Celebrity Jeopardy skit is

Saten Twist - Alex Trebek (He wears a white wig, and his cutie mark has been changed to a game show wheel.)
Sean the hedgehog as himself (He's a famous war hero.)
Fluttershy as herself
and special guest star, Pierce Hawkins as Nicholas Cage

Alex: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. I thought we were done with this, but Regis Philbin, that mongrel idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Decided to do a celebrity millionaire.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And network competition being what it is, I stand before you, a broken, and miserable stallion.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: With that said, let's take a look at the scores. Sean the hedgehog has negative 16,500 dollars.
Sean: Damn you, and your daily doubles!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: One day it'll be my turn Trebek.
Alex: Great. Fluttershy has an amazing negative 58,000 dollars. Good job.
Audience: *Laughing*
Fluttershy: *Talking very quietly* thank you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And finally, Nicholas Cage is in the lead with 8 dollars.
Audience: *Laughing*
Nicholas: You got lights, you got cameras. BITCHIN' TECHNOLOGY!!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Alex: Don't know how you can get 8 dollars, but better luck to all of you in the next round.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It's time for double jeopardy. Let's take a look at the board. And the categories are..

Potent Potables
The Pen Is Mightier

Alex: That category is quotes from famous authors, so you'll all probably be more comfortable with our next category...

Shiny Objects

Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Continuing with

Opposites
Things You Shouldn't Put In Your Mouth
What Time Is It
And finally, Months That Start With Feb.

Audience: *Laughs*
Alex: Mr. Cage, you're in the lead, so we'll start with you.
Nicholas: Who? Why? Where?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay. Fluttershy, why don't you pick a category?
Fluttershy: *Scared* Uh, no. I'll pass.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay, you'll pass. Smart move. Sean, why don't you pick?
Sean: Ah, well met.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: I'll take months that start with Feb Trebek.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: For how much?
Sean: Surprise me you filthy bastard.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Okay that's completely unnecessary.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Months that start with Feb for 800. This is the only month that starts with Feb.
Sean: *Rings in*
Alex: Mr. The Hedgehog?
Sean: Febtober!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No.
Fluttershy: *Rings in*
Alex: Flutershy?
Fluttershy: What is... Febturday?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: *Laughs*
Alex: No.
Sean: She said turd!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: *To Sean* I hate you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: The answer was February. That's the only month that starts with Feb. It was last month.
Sean: Aha, a trick question!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Yes, it was a trick question Mr. The Hedgehog. Why don't you pick a category?
Sean: I've gotta ask you, about the penis mightier.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: What? No. That's the pen is mightier.
Sean: Call it whatever you want Trebek. What matters is does it work?
Audience: Ohh!! *Clapping*
Sean: Will it really mighty my penis man?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It's not a product Mr. The Hedgehog.
Sean: Cause I've heard of devices like that before. Wasted a pretty penny, I don't mind telling you, and if the penis mighter really works I'll order a dozen!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: It's not a penis mightier Mr. The Hedgehog. There's no such thing.
Nicholas: Wait wait wait. Are you selling penis mightiers?
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: No! No I am not.
Sean: Well you're sitting on a goldmine Trebek!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: alright. I'll tell you what, let's move on to final jeopardy. It should be a lot of fun.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And the category is, the federalist papers.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Wait. You know what? I'm sorry, that's for regular jeopardy we're filming later today. Your category is Humans.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: All you have to do is tell me, are humans pretty?
Audience: *Laughing*

The jeopardy theme played while everyone answered the question.

Alex: Yes, or no. We'll except either answer. Are humans pretty? Keep in mind, there's no wrong answer. Humans.

The bell rang

Alex: Alright, let's see what everypony wrote, Mr. Cage, we'll start with you... And your podium is gone.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Nicholas: I know where it went! I can search for it!
Alex: You lost your podium.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You know what? I don't care. Let's move on. Fluttershy-
Fluttershy: *Nervous* What? What?
Alex: Settle down, just relax.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: You wrote....... Nothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: And you wagered..... Nothing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Fluttershy: The pen was too heavy.
Audience: Aww, *Laughs*
Alex: Fair enough. Mr. The Hedgehog.
Sean: We meet again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Let's see your answer. *Looks at his answer* I guess that's your wager. A buck. Fine, and your answer is, futter.
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Buck futter.
Audience: Ooooh!! YEAH!
Alex: I don't get it.
Sean: Oh, I think you do. You do indeed.
Alex: Well thanks for joining us-
Sean: Buck futter!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Alex: Fine. Whatever. That's it for Celebrity Jeopardy. I don't know.
Audience: *Laughing*

The End

Coming up next, it's The Story Of Corporal Agarn.

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic Rainbow as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy

And introducing the hedgehogs as the Indians.

Sean as Chief Wild Eagle
and Sonic as Crazy Cat

Corporal Agarn was helping Captain Parmenter put weapons in the supply room when this happened.

Dobbs: *Playing his bugle*
Corporal Agarn: You think that five hours of practice would help him get better, but no! With Dobbs, it's the complete opposite!
Audience: *Laughing*
Dobbs: *Stops playing bugle*
Corporal Agarn: Thank goodness.
Dobbs: *Looks at the sky* Hey Captain! Smoke!
Captain Parmenter: *Looks at smoke*
Dobbs: There's a fire up that hill!
Captain Parmenter: Oh there's no fire, that's just smoke signals from some indians.
Audience: *Laughing*
Dobbs: But still, we should act like it's a fire, and run away!

Half of the soldiers started running away.

Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: Some help you are to this army.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: *Looks at smoke*
Captain Parmenter: Can you understand what it says Sarge?
Sargent O' Rourke: Yeah. It's from a tribe of indians, and they want to go on warpath.
Corporal Agarn: Which path would you have to take to go to war?
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: Never mind that, let's go.

The indians that created the smoke signal was the Hikawis.

Sargent O' Rourke: *Looks at indians*
Corporal Agarn: They don't look like they want to take any path towards a war.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: It's called a warpath.
Chief Wild Eagle: They are here everyone.
Indians: Yay!!
Corporal Agarn: They're cheering for us?
Sargent O' Rourke: What's going on here?
Crazy Cat: You saw our signals, and arrived.
Sargent O' Rourke: You said you wanted to go on a warpath.
Chief Wild Eagle: No, that was just to get you over here to join us.
Audience: *Laughing*
Crazy Cat: We want to party with you, and form an alliance.
Chief Wild Eagle: And do some trading of course.
Sargent O' Rourke: *His eyes turn into dollar signs*
Audience: *Laughing*

And so they partied, and everyone had a good time.

Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the bugle poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning you Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*

Golfing

Starring Tom Foolery as Otis
Master Sword as Chip
Snow Wonder as Elena
Heartsong as Casey
Cosmic Rainbow as Olson
Mortomis as Caddy
Blaze as Mitchell

Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: What are you laughing for? We didn't even start the skit yet.
Audience: *Laughing*

The End

Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: What the hell are you doing?! If we didn't even start the skit, what makes you think it's the end?

Now the skit starts. At the Ponyville golf course, Mitchell, and Olson were playing against each other.

Mitchell: *Waiting to hit the ball as he hears a train's horn*
Olson: *Waiting*
Mitchell: *Hits the ball*
Olson: *Sees the ball land on the green*
Mitchell: Ha. You said I couldn't do it.
Olson: Oh, that's what I said half an hour ago.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mitchell: Idiot.
Olson: I bet you cheated.
Audience: *Laughing*

Meanwhile, Otis, and Chip were two holes behind them on the 12th hole.

Chip: So I heard you had trouble with the audience, and producers.
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: Where did you hear that?
Chip: Oh, somewhere. Actually, I think it was the 11th hole. I'm not sure.
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: You mean you can't remember?
Chip: Do I look like a smart pony to you?
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: No.
Chip: Well there you go. Let's tee off.
Otis: *Spots Elena, and Casey* You do that, I'm going to jack off.
Audience: *Laughing*
Chip: What for? *Looks behind him, and sees Elena, and Casey* Oh. That's why.
Otis: So, how long have you sexy mares been playing this sport?
Elena: I played for four years.
Casey: Two years.
Otis: Oh yeah? I have been playing for three years. Right between you two.
Chip: Hey Otis. I thought you said you were going to jack off!
Audience: *Laughing*
Casey: What did he say?
Otis: He's drunk, forget him. *Runs to Chip* What the hell did you say that out loud for?
Chip: I was just repeating something you told me.
Otis: Yeah well, don't do that.
Chip: How come?
Otis: There are certain things you don't say outloud.
Chip: Well I told you I'm an idiot. I don't know any better.
Audience: *Laughing*
Otis: *Walks to tee* Let's finish this hole.
Chip: *Looking away from Otis* Okay. Idiot.
Otis: And stop calling yourself an idiot.
Chip: I just did.
Audience: *Laughing*

Master Sword, Tom, and Saten Twist were at Tom's house trying to make a cake.

Saten Twist: We need to have chocolate on this cake.
Master Sword: No we don't! Chocolate is bad.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: How could you say that?! Chocolate is the best flavor for everything!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Saten Twist: Aren't we forgetting something?
Tom: Frosting?
Saten Twist: I'm not talking about the cake. I mean the show.
Tom: Oh, that. Brony of the month. For March, it's BlondLionEzel.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Tom: When it comes to writing about My Little Pony with super heroes from Marvel, the possibilities are endless.
Master Sword: What are super heroes from Marvel?
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: Why don't you ask him? He knows basically everything about them.
Master Sword: Forget it, let's continue working on the cake.

Meanwhile, Sean was at the mansion he created for himself. It was near Fluttershy's cottage.

Mortomis: Whoa. This place is cool.
Sean: Yes it is. Soon, I might make my own airport by here. I'll have a collection of airplanes, and host an airshow once every month.
Mortomis: If they'll let you of course.
Sean: What's that supposed to mean?
Mortomis: You're not a pony.
Sean: Well Zecora isn't a pony, and they let her do whatever she wants.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sean: For all I know, she could get away with raping fillies.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Mortomis: *Sees a big model train layout* How much did this cost?
Sean: How much do you make in five years?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mortomis: Can I run one of the trains?
Sean: Of course.
Mortomis: Thanks.
Sean: But if you derail it, I'll kill you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: *Walks into Sean's house, and looks at the camera* Hey, get back to us. Will you? *Walks away* God I love breaking the 4th wall.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*

Back at Tom's house

Master Sword: The cake is finished.
Tom: Good work.
Saten Twist: *Takes a slice, and eats it* Delicious.
Tom: All we need is some beer, and hot dogs to celebrate this Season 2 premiere.
Master Sword: With cake?
Audience: *Laughing*
Announcer: Okay fellas, time is up!
Tom: What?!
Announcer: The season 2 premiere is over. Go away!
Tom: Goddamnit. I didn't even get to have any cake.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*

The End

STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2015